Home > Fiction > Mistaken Identity

Mistaken Identity

I can hardly believe it’s time for Friday Fictioneers once again, but it is! This is a 100-ish word writing challenge hosted by the lovely Rochelle, who is currently on her summer break, it seems. Therefore we have a re-run photo to write to. It’s not a re-run for me, though, as I’ve only been doing this for a year. A year and 4 days, in fact, so this is my FF anniversary!

The photo was contributed by Madison Woods, and nearly made me throw up when I saw it. I have no idea what it is, and I don’t think I want to either. Thanks, Madison 🙂 .

Click on Bracken, the little blue fellow, to see this week’s other contributions.

grapevine2bgoo1

“Trust me, this stuff is fine! Hmm, tastes a bit rank.”

“It looks gross. How you know it’s good to eat?”

“It says so in the ‘Fruits of the World’ book. See? Ugh, it’s all crunchy.”

’Curved and yellow in colour, a good source of potassium. Peel before eating.’ Sounds like a banana. That’s not right. Look, there’s a page missing. It’s been ripped out.”

“Oh. I wonder what the description for this was?”

Gross, do not eat? I’ll Google it. Here it is. Oh.”

“I can’t feel my feet. Everything’s going dark.”

“If anything were to happen to you, could I have your Xbox?”

“Why do you ask?”

“No reason.”

  1. August 27, 2014 at 6:50 pm

    Whatever that is it is absolutely pukey looking! :/ Bleh… of course I had to see that right before lunch. I’m not longer hungry…

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 6:55 am

      I actually swore when I saw the photo! Sorry about your lunch 😦

      Like

  2. August 27, 2014 at 8:39 pm

    Funny. The Xbox comment made me laugh. Brothers I guess.

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 6:56 am

      Could be, though he doesn’t seem too upset! Possibly he’s read it’s not definitely going to be fatal.

      Like

  3. August 27, 2014 at 8:46 pm

    Creative entry! It indeed does not look like a banana! 😀

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 6:57 am

      I certainly wouldn’t eat bananas if they looked like this 🙂

      Like

  4. August 27, 2014 at 9:38 pm

    always get your priorities right, lol 😉

    Like

  5. August 27, 2014 at 9:48 pm

    Ew. Yuk. Ick. But I’ll take the xbox.

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 7:00 am

      Me too.
      I wouldn’t eat that no matter what the book supposedly said.

      Like

  6. August 27, 2014 at 10:38 pm

    Good story, funny that the kid is calling dibs on the xbox. This was the picture for the first FF box I did. I remember this photo well.

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 12:37 am

      Not one that can be easily forgotten, is it? What it *really* is can never compare to all the stories everyone came up with to explain it, LOL.

      Like

      • August 28, 2014 at 7:02 am

        It must be fun to take a picture when no-one knows what it is, and see what people come with!

        Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 7:01 am

      It’s hard to forget I reckon! Glad you liked the story 🙂

      Like

  7. August 27, 2014 at 11:31 pm

    Funny! I don’t want one friend like this one.

    Like

  8. August 28, 2014 at 12:39 am

    I think I lost a few Fictioneers when I posted this photo, but it has to be one of the most memorable of all the photos used. Sure you don’t want to know what it is?

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 7:03 am

      The title of the photo said something about grapes. Maybe some bugs have built their home on a bunch of grapes?

      Like

      • August 28, 2014 at 12:05 pm

        It was a large grapevine that had been cut when the road crew came down our road. The goo is the stuff that oozed out of the end of the vine. Still pretty yucky! I’d never seen anything like it before, so of course I had to take a picture. So there you have it, the rest of the story.

        Like

        • August 28, 2014 at 12:09 pm

          Wow, who knew all of that could ooze out of a grape vine! Yuck.

          Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 8:11 am

      I would love to! Don’t keep us in suspenders. 😉

      Like

  9. Lyn
    August 28, 2014 at 12:58 am

    LOL. That was a great read, D-Man, loved it! 😀

    Like

  10. August 28, 2014 at 1:55 am

    very funny. this made me laugh. 🙂

    Like

  11. August 28, 2014 at 6:04 am

    Very funny. Well done!

    Like

  12. August 28, 2014 at 10:23 am

    Funny. Always check with google before tasting!

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 10:56 am

      Google is the font of all knowledge!

      Like

  13. August 28, 2014 at 11:22 am

    Seems like home a to me!

    Like

  14. August 28, 2014 at 1:53 pm

    Ali, I’m glad I now know what that stuff is. That’s really weird. I would also never have guessed that was inside a grape vine. Rocelle has quite a sense of humor to choose that photo of all those shown over the years. Your story was funny, but sounded like kids. That one was kind of mercenary. He should have actually gone for help when his firend’s feet went numb. That was real dark humor. Of course kids often can’t envision someone actually dying, so it probably isn’t that bad. Well written dialogue. 🙂 —Susan

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 2:56 pm

      Thanks 🙂
      I would certainly hope if it happened to me my colleague(s) would get help (especially since the other guy in my story has a phone).

      Like

  15. August 28, 2014 at 3:30 pm

    Mmmmm!!! I must borrow some of that for a certain marsupial…. 😉

    Like

    • August 28, 2014 at 3:31 pm

      Ooh, nasty! Pop it in a cartoon so we can all watch him eat it 🙂

      Like

  16. August 28, 2014 at 8:34 pm

    There is a purpose for everything.. and an Xbox is a great price sometimes … 🙂

    Like

    • August 29, 2014 at 6:28 am

      Every cloud and all that… 🙂

      Like

  17. August 28, 2014 at 8:36 pm

    hahahaha! you are sick..or should be after seeing that revolting whatever-it-is!

    Like

    • August 29, 2014 at 6:29 am

      I was inflicted with a sick sense of humour even before seeing the picture 🙂

      Like

  18. August 29, 2014 at 1:24 am

    ha. That’s one way to get an x-box. Rip out the page about poisin and then get the other person to eat it.
    I’d like his baseball glove, if he has one.

    Like

    • August 29, 2014 at 6:36 am

      Hah, I never though of that. Quite sneaky!
      I’ll get back to you regarding the baseball glove 🙂

      Like

  19. August 29, 2014 at 4:27 am

    Ooops! Hopefully just a momentary paralysis 😛 And you’re right…this picture is pretty gross. And ewww even more to Madison’s explanation. Hahaha!
    Ellespeth

    Like

    • August 29, 2014 at 6:37 am

      Yes, I’m sure he’s going to be just fine 😉

      Like

  20. August 29, 2014 at 5:45 am

    Dear Draliman, You are so flipping funny – I love the “Could I have your x-box?”. Great story! This “Oozy junk made me queasy too!” Your story is very good and smart! Hey – what are friends for? I don’t care if someone told me it tasted like good old home cooking – I still wouldn’t eat that stuff – Maybe the leaves on the tree, but not that glob! Nan 🙂

    Like

    • August 29, 2014 at 6:39 am

      Thank you! I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
      I wouldn’t eat that under any circumstances, but I’m not very adventurous when it comes to food. though I think even the most adventurous would baulk at that.

      Like

  21. August 29, 2014 at 7:12 pm

    Your story had me laughing out loud, a good think for the middle of a Friday afternoon and when I’m just ready to start attacking piles of papers. Thanks.

    janet

    Like

    • August 31, 2014 at 5:00 am

      I’m glad I brightened up an afternoon of paperwork 🙂

      Like

  22. August 30, 2014 at 12:20 am

    Oh, no. You would have to go with eating this thing! Too bad about that missing page. Oops! Really funny, Alistair. Happy Blog Anniversary! Congrats!!

    Like

    • August 31, 2014 at 5:05 am

      Quite a few people decided it would be eaten! I don’t think it ended well for any of the eaters, though.

      Like

  23. August 30, 2014 at 2:41 am

    Nasty looking. Burnt lemon cream with foam, maybe.
    Great story, I want your mind.

    Like

    • August 30, 2014 at 2:41 pm

      Very nasty looking! It’s goo from the severed end of a grapevine covering grapes, apparently.
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

      • August 30, 2014 at 6:57 pm

        I always read comments, yes grapevine but it also resembles a few of my kitchen mistakes. My dogs would not even eat them, really.

        Like

        • August 31, 2014 at 4:47 am

          That would be quite the kitchen mistake to look like that!

          Like

  24. August 30, 2014 at 2:48 pm

    Dear Ali,

    Happy anniversary first off. You’ve been a delightful addition to our FF community.

    Now onto your story…eeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww! Poor shnook, first he ate it and then his sentimental friend cares only about his XBOX. (I hope a snake bites him you-know-where 😉 ). Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

    • August 30, 2014 at 2:57 pm

      Dear Rochelle,
      Thanks! I’ve really enjoyed my first year at FF.
      Yes, he deserves some sort of prize just for eating the stuff, and who needs friends like that!
      I hope you’re enjoyed your holiday 🙂
      Ali

      Like

  25. August 30, 2014 at 10:53 pm

    This is delightful. Love how the Xbox was asked for but the discovery on Google not read aloud. Meany-pants.

    Like

    • August 31, 2014 at 4:47 am

      He just wanted to stake his claim before panicking him I expect!

      Like

  26. Sarah Ann
    August 31, 2014 at 8:45 pm

    Oops. Better check for ripped pages where exotic fruits are concerned. Love the priorities here – boys will be boys.

    Like

    • September 1, 2014 at 7:23 am

      Yes, a bit careless of them not to check. Everyone loves a free Xbox 🙂

      Like

  27. Sun
    September 1, 2014 at 11:05 pm

    somebody methinks is cruising through life with serious ulterior motives…oh, the poor innocent “why do you ask” character. 🙂

    Like

    • September 2, 2014 at 8:08 am

      All’s fair in love and Xbox 🙂

      Like

  28. September 11, 2014 at 11:34 am

    I missed this one! Hilarious!

    Like

  29. Aileen
    January 2, 2015 at 3:31 pm

    Sounds like they used one of my nature and wildlife books – they’re in desperate need of updating too, though I hope I wouldn’t be so daft as to try it! 😉

    Like

    • January 2, 2015 at 4:14 pm

      I’d hardly know a deadly toadstool from a cucumber, so I don’t push my luck 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Aileen
        January 2, 2015 at 4:20 pm

        Wise decision 🙂

        Like

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