Cash Cow
It’s time for my entry to Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo prompt is by Jean L. Hays.
I was going to do a dialogue based on all the “no parking” signs but ended up doing some even sillier dialogue concentrating on the banner which sort of says “Unthink”. I know it’s slightly bad form to write “500” rather than “five hundred” but I was having word count issues :-).
Read all the other contributions by clicking on the blue froggy.
Copyright Jean L. Hays
“UnThink Memory Wipes” – only 500 bucks, and if ever there was a year Bob wanted to forget, this was it.
“One memory wipe,” said the receptionist. “500 dollars, please.”
Presently Bob emerged looking confused, the last year erased.
“One memory wipe – 500 dollars please, sir.”
Bob paid up (again) and left.
“Heh heh!” smirked the receptionist. “Great scam.” He turned to the technician. “You want your cut?”
“Cut of what?”
“You stood too close to the machine again, huh?” asked the receptionist.
“What machine?” asked the technician.
“Uhhhh… never mind. One memory wipe – that’ll be 500 dollars please, sir. Heh heh.”
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Friday Fictioneers
draliman on life 
I saw that Unthink banner and thought “I bet draliman writes about that!”
Sadly, I didn’t make that bet with anyone, so I don’t get rich this week. Cute story though 🙂
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You know me well :-). That banner definitely looked like it was begging for someone to write a story about it.
I’m glad you liked the story even if you didn’t make a big wad of cash out of it!
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This was great! A great humor spin on classic sci-fi. 😆
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I’m glad you liked my little bit of Total Recall meets… I don’t know… something crazy with Jim Carrey in it 🙂
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Have you ever read the original short story that inspired Total Recall? If not, you should, because it was rather humorous as well. 🙂
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I’m aware of it but not sure if I ever read it. I’ll have to track down a copy, thanks!
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PKD is one of my favorite authors. I think you’ll like it. The short story is called, We Can Remember it for you Wholesale, I believe.
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Thanks!
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Can I get one of those? It wouldn’t solve my problems, but they wouldn’t bother me because I wouldn’t remember them.
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Ah, but they’d probably still be there waiting to leap out at you. I expect Bob will discover that soon enough!
I’ll put you on the priority list for when it’s invented, though 🙂
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I think I can send you even MORE customers.
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🙂
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Such fun! I saw the UNTHINK sign but COULDN’T THINK of a story about it. You’ve done a stellar job.
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Thanks! The moment I saw it I thought “Total Recall but in reverse” 🙂
I’m glad you liked it!
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I’ll take a few of those…wait, what? 🙂
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A few of those what? Huh? 🙂
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Very cute – if i could only remember what I was reading. 😉 Randy
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Something about a… um… oh.
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Ha! Good one, whoever you are.
from someone
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Good one what? Who’s this? Who am I?
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Such a fun story and very imaginative! I loved it.
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Glad you liked it 🙂
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i wondered what you were up to this time and i wasn’t disappointed. it was funny. truly enjoyed it. 🙂
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I’m glad you liked it! I saw the banner and thought it was just begging for a story.
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Flashes to “Men in Black” … where did I leave my neuralizer? Darling Hubby also makes an excellent and effective shooter called the “Mind Eraser.” Thanks for the grins.
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You’re welcome for the grins 🙂 At least the neuralizer was free!
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That was great (bump)…what am I doing here.
DJ
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What are you doing where? Who are you? Whatever it was you thought was great, I’m glad 🙂
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LOL…only you! 🙂
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Yep, only me 🙂
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Glad there is you!
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🙂
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Not a clue how your mind works.
How did you go there?
Never would I waste $500 on anything I didn’t control or couldn’t eat.
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I was thinking outside the box 🙂
Maybe you did spend $500 on a memory wipe and now you’ve forgotten.
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Noooo, I love wattling in my misery.
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Ali, Hilarious. 😀 I don’t doubt there’ll be something like that one day, but it’ll probably be illegal like some drugs are now. There are some things we don’t dare forget. Actually, I forget enough without using one of those wipes. What I forget usually pops back in later though, so I don’t worry about it. 🙂 — Suzanne
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It’ll be “back room” memory wipes performed by “doctors” who got their medical degree online 🙂
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This Friday Fictioneers thing is pretty cool. I think you should write one of these every week! Oh, sorry, I haven’t even introduced myself, I’m Evil Squirrel! Nice blog you have here Mr. Draliman!
All kidding aside, I kinda got excited when I saw the picture, because old Route 66 runs just a couple miles north of where I live as it crosses from Illinois over into Missouri, so I’ve seen those signs a lot. I’m guessing from the “Begins” sign and the skyscrapers in the background, that the photo was actually taken in Chicago, so I can forget about trying to identify any of the landmarks in it…
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Nice to meet you, um, who did you say you are again? 🙂
I’m aware that it’s a road and something about “getting your kicks on route 66” but that’s the limit of my knowledge on the subject. So I concentrated on the banner instead! I’ll have to take a look at Google maps and see where it goes.
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Route 66 technically doesn’t exist anymore, but it is a fabled part of 20th Century America, thus the “historic” signs. There are two breaks in the old Route 66 just near me… one of which is the bridge that goes from Illinois into Missouri. It shut down in the 70’s, and was recently turned into a walking trail.
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Thanks. I bet a few people still follow the route it took, just for the adventure!
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What a great story. That ‘Unthink’ sign was just begging to become a story, and you’ve done it justice, and then some. Great fun.
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Yeah, I couldn’t let that one go by without making it part of my story 🙂
Glad you liked it!
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Dear Ali,
You have an amazing sense of humor. Mix that with Sci Fi and you have your cash cow. I can hardly type for laughing. Great story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
Thank you! I’m glad I made you laugh 🙂
Ali
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Dear Draliman,
Excellent, whimsical and humorous. Who could ask for more. I loved your story for its simplicity and imagination. Even the invention of Memory Wipes was inspired. Very well done.
Aloha,
Doug
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Dear Doug,
I’m so glad you enjoyed it. I seem to be on a “humour kick” at the moment!
Ali
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This is zany, Ali. I didn’t even notice the “Unthink” sign. Great take and really inventive. You always seem to see things I don’t. 🙂
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I wonder what that banner is really about? I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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Great story! Also now I just have to read the PKD original as mentioned by your commenter.
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Thanks! I need to read it too. Having seen two versions of Total Recall, it would be nice to read the inspiration.
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I’m cracking up over here…I will find a way to use the phrase ‘memory wipe’ in future situations.
Ellespeth
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Try dropping it into some everyday conversations 🙂
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Ingenious! well done!
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Thanks!
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Good fun. Gave me a good laugh.
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I’m glad you liked it!
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I’m glad you focused on the UNTHINK sign, Great story with a lot of humour but also a scary thought that such a machine would be in the hands of such a man. Still, I can’t help but admire his enterprising spirit. Maybe those who buy into it get what they deserve!
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It doesn’t sound like the safest of machines to subject oneself to, does it? Glad you liked my story!
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Ha!! This was wonderful! A very imaginative idea. I think the 500 worked fine :-). I wonder if the person asking for the 500 will ever get caught by their own scam…
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I’m sure sooner or later he’ll wander too close to the machine himself. Or the technician will twig that something’s afoot and take matters into his own hands (if he ever remembers who he is!).
I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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Who’s on first? Hu? What? Where? Very clever, Draliman!
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PS) I hadn’t figured out that the other sign said “un-think;” I just thought it was in Russian! :-p
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The first few times I read the sign I didn’t even notice that two of the letters are upside down. I guess my brain auto-corrected 🙂
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I noticed they were upside down, but thought I was looking at Russian… my brain shut down. 😉
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Thanks, glad you liked it!
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so interesting – Route 66 is conventionally experienced from East to West, mimicking the countless California-bound travelers that headed that-a-way way before. But for nonconformists heading West to East on Route 66, this battered brown sign in downtown Chicago marks the end of the road. And if their rebellion is spent, they can drive a block north to the “Begin Route 66” sign and start chasing sunsets.
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I think I’d rather do it the “conventional” way and finish my journey in the warmth and sunshine!
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You never cease to amaze me with your sharp thinking & brilliant sense of humour. What a great tale. I was cracking up laughing lol 🙂
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Thanks for such a lovely comment! I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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This had a CLASSIC comedy feel to it. Well done, darling. One of your best.
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Thanks! Nothing too sophisticated, straight for the laughs 🙂
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“Get your Memory Wipes Here! Only $500 and it works!” I can just see this as a scam in the future – but it appears that it does work. Wow – I like how your mind works! Nan 🙂
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It’s the perfect scam when you can’t even remember where your money went!
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Oh my, I laughed out loud! What a great story.
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Thanks, I’m glad it made you laugh 🙂
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Ha.. very clever and fun .. I think.. I might have forgotten.. where do I pay?
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You pay just over here sir, 500 dollars. Heh heh.
Thanks, glad you liked it!
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