Friday Fictioneers – Poorly Thought Out
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle at Addicted to Purple. This week’s photo was contributed by Claire Fuller.
To read this week’s other stories, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright Claire Fuller
“So what’s this you’re demonstrating, then?”
“Well, you know how the little bastar… darlings from Class 7B are always tipping the lockers over?”
“Yeeesssss…”
“I’ve retro-fitted them with special bars that automatically slam down to steady them the moment any tipping movement is detected.”
“Riigghttt… one problem I can see…”
“I’ll give them a shove and you’ll see it in action.”
“…is that there’s a busy corridor right behind…”
Shove.
Creak.
Clunk.
SPLAT!
“Yay! The anti-tipping mechanism deployed beautifully.”
“On top of Class 5C.”
“Some sort of pre-deployment alarm system, perhaps?”
“Go away now, please. Somebody call an ambulance!”
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Friday Fictioneers
draliman on life 
Yes, that’s government bureaucracy in action. Gotta love it.
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By the time they’ve been through all the committees, vetting processes and so on there’s never enough money left to do the job properly.
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Pacman with moving walls…do eet!
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That sounds fun. A new lease of life for an old game!
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Would not be surprised if that really happened.
DJ
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Probably has 🙂
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D-man at his destructive best 🙂 Nothing worse than a slamming stabilising bar. The inventor was obviously not scientifically minded. Someone needs to tell him bolting them to the floor might be a better option–and there’d be a lot less blood and guts.
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Where’s the fun in that? Auto-deploying metal bars are much more exciting 🙂
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Hahahah.. thanks for my daily dose of laughter
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You’re welcome 🙂
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I hate when that happens! lol
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Yeah, it’s always a bit annoying, disrupts the whole day with all those paramedics tramping in and out 🙂
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Hah! Engineering overtaking humanity.
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And crushing it horribly 🙂
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Dear Ali,
Best laid plans of mice, men and bureaucracy. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
Well, it’s impossible to provide for every contingency and get it all signed off, built and installed! Something has to give…
I’m glad you liked it!
Ali
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Dear Draliman,
You are a man after my own heart. Well imagined and perfectly executed.
Aloha,
Doug
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Dear Doug,
Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it! It took a couple of fairly major rewrites to get this one done.
Ali
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The HSE is going to have a field day!
Good piece.
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HSE pah! It’s a world gone mad, all those rules and regs. Though they may have a point this time, I suppose…
I’m glad you liked it!
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Hehehe. Safety? Whatever for? Look at all the cool functions this thing has. I love it.
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Stabilises lockers and crushes unruly school children, all in one handy package 🙂
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Class 5C probably had it coming anyway. It pays to stay vigilant.
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They were probably always in detention for “failing to pay attention”. This’ll learn ’em 🙂
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Engineers were involved for sure… they love to wreak havoc (though they think they’ve covered all the angles!)
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It’s all about the product. Consequences be damned, it worked, didn’t it? 🙂
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Who cares about the consequences, right?
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But well written. 5C – pah!
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I never liked 5C. Troublemakers, the lot of them.
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Splat.. I think there is a reason to evaluate ideas before implementing.
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Possibly a “live test” wasn’t the way to go.
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I do love a good preventative mechanism that just causes more damage. This post has the Safety Unicorn® Seal of Approval!
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Wow, thanks! I have reached the pinnacle of the Health and Safety mountain 🙂 Mayhem guaranteed.
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Would it work for tipping cows?
Funny and typical when solving a problem via committee! Been there done that! 🙂
You know I really miss the LOL – so much easier to type! 😦
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It can be affixed to anything! That’s the beauty of it 🙂
LOL away!
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Gee, I hope everyone is still alive! I think they have a law suit on their hands. Well done, Ali!
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I’m sure they’ll be fine. In a couple of months or so 🙂 It’s Christmas come early for the lawyers.
I’m glad you enjoyed it!
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LOL. Too funny. 🙂
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Glad you liked it 🙂
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LOL! AS you pointed out it’s “Christmas come early for the lawyers. :-D”
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This is gonna cost 🙂
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Hahaha. Having taught for umpteen years, I find this hilarious. Kids ‘messing about’ in lockers is comon enough, but having lockers that ‘squash’ the class behind when shoved is an excellent… er… ill-thought-out-idea. 🙂
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Maybe this wasn’t quite the “accident” it first appeared to be 🙂
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I’m constantly poorly thought out and caught out – had all the gutters cleaned and this week the drain couldn’t cope and flooded. Water pouring out in all directions like the old days was the best system after all!
Thanks for reminding us sometimes the best option is to do nothing…
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Oh no! You do the right thing, get it all sorted…
With all the rain recently (I think you’re also in the UK?) I’m not surprised something had to give.
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Love this story–so typical of the “perfect fix” to any problem, right? Those whoopies get you every time! 🙂
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It seemed like such a good idea at the time 🙂
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🙂
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Too bad! Well, back to the drawing board.
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I dread to think what his next brilliant idea will be!
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Nothing like a solution that’s worse than the problem. Good story.
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It happens quite often, I think (though maybe not this exact situation!).
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Good story, Ali. I knew it was going to turn dark when I saw the word “SPLAT.” Well done. 😀
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Dark in a funny way, though 🙂
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Genius. A few squashed…darlings are a small price to pay for progress!
Nicely done, great dialogue story.
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Exactly! There are always casualties on the road into the future.
Glad you liked it, I enjoy writing dialogue.
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An excellent story, I love dark humor.
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Thanks, I love writing it!
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After a few such accidents I’m sure the kids will learn not to mess around in the lockers! Wonderful, as always, Ali. 🙂
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Thanks! I dunno, some kids never learn 🙂
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Oops. There was god intentions there, at least. Hope that ambulance is quick!
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I hope so too. The best laid plans… and the most poorly laid plans too 🙂
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