Home > Fiction > MFTS – What Goes Around…

MFTS – What Goes Around…

Here is my story for Barbara Beacham’s Monday’s Finish the Story. This week’s photo was provided by Marcy B. Ayanian. She also provided the opening sentence! The opening sentence is in bold in my story, and to view this week’s other contributions, click the blue froggy.

I spent all day yesterday holding on to a comedy story with grim determination, but couldn’t think of a decent ending so I’ve written this instead.

Copyright 2015 Marcy B. Ayanian

Copyright 2015 Marcy B. Ayanian

 

As her mount shifted uneasily under her, she grasped the brim of her old felt Stetson, gazed upwards and remembered Jean Pierre.

The way his eyes flashed with amusement at some joke. The way his body moved while playing tennis at their Paris manor. The smile on his face when he repeated “I do” at their wedding, the smile which remained throughout the reception, and later, when they were alone…

The way his beautiful eyes opened wide as saucers as the laced brandy took effect, the poison causing his heart to falter, then stop.

She even spared a thought (however briefly) for the maid, eyes streaming tears as she was lead to the gallows, lips protesting her innocence of a crime she didn’t commit.

Lady Genevieve smiled as she rode back to the manor – her manor now – and looked out over Paris.

In the shadows lurked her butler, sometime lover of the maid, a grim smile on his face as he watched her sip the cocktail he’d so carefully prepared.

 

  1. NotAPunkRocker
    September 8, 2015 at 7:30 pm

    Some would have gone for romance, others for comedy (like you originally thought)…you went for “Arsenic and Old Lace” instead LOL

    Like

    • September 8, 2015 at 8:01 pm

      I haven’t read the others yet (I always write mine first so that I don’t get subconsciously influenced) but I’m sure there’s a romance or two in there.
      I don’t do romance 🙂

      Like

  2. Merbear74
    September 8, 2015 at 7:46 pm

    She’s one cold lady!

    Like

    • September 8, 2015 at 8:02 pm

      Yeah, soon to be cold and dead heh heh 🙂

      Like

      • Merbear74
        September 8, 2015 at 8:03 pm

        I admire how morbid you are! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  3. September 8, 2015 at 8:02 pm

    Karma is definitely a bitch. Sometimes, Karma looks like the butler 🙂

    Like

    • September 8, 2015 at 8:05 pm

      Turns out this time the butler did do it (the second one anyway).

      Like

  4. September 8, 2015 at 8:15 pm

    Ooh, I like this one. What a cold and calculating lady. But I think she’s about to get her comeuppance… Good on the butler. Some lovely descriptions, Ali. 🙂

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 8:16 am

      Karma, your name is “the Butler” 🙂 I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  5. September 8, 2015 at 8:17 pm

    So it was the butler! Great story Ali!

    Like

  6. September 8, 2015 at 8:48 pm

    What goes around comes around. Heheheh.

    Like

  7. September 9, 2015 at 12:57 am

    What a great twist at the end! Loved the story Ali! Thank you for participating in the Mondays Finish the Story challenge. Be well… ^..^

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 8:19 am

      I’m always one for a twisty ending 🙂

      Like

  8. LRose
    September 9, 2015 at 1:00 am

    I agree: Write first, read others afterward. Really fun read!

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 8:20 am

      I don’t like to be influenced!
      I’m glad you liked it.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. September 9, 2015 at 1:00 am

    You never disappoint. Don’t think you would be as good writing romance. 🙂

    DJ

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 8:21 am

      No, I tried romance for a FF story once. When I wrote “she melted” everyone, knowing my writing, assumed she’d actually melted :-(. Well, I tried…
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

  10. September 9, 2015 at 2:11 am

    It takes great talent to kill off three people in 150 words or less. I admire your efficiency!

    Like

  11. September 9, 2015 at 2:47 am

    Karma has never been so swift. 😀

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 8:22 am

      She never even got a chance to try out her heated swimming pool!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Lyn
    September 9, 2015 at 2:48 am

    Yes! she got what was a commin’ to her! Evilsquirrel is correct…I admire your efficiency! 😀

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 8:23 am

      She certainly did! I like to keep my deaths/wordage ratio up 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Lata Sunil
    September 9, 2015 at 3:20 am

    Wow.. A story within a story within a story.. Loved the numerous twists you have in this story.

    Like

  14. September 9, 2015 at 4:36 am

    Wonderful! You made my day…love the twists and flips. Well told!

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 8:24 am

      I’m glad you enjoyed my twisty tale of murder most horrid 🙂

      Like

  15. September 9, 2015 at 6:02 am

    Wow, Ali. People are dropping like flies in your story. It sounds like that estate might have a curse on it. It will probably have ghosts in future. 😀 — Suzanne

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 8:24 am

      I certainly wouldn’t want to inherit it next 🙂

      Like

  16. September 9, 2015 at 6:04 am

    Sorry about not mentioning the most important thing.. Really well done. 🙂

    Like

  17. September 9, 2015 at 10:00 am

    The plot thickens. I also like to write before I read the other submissions. Sometimes that can be a hard thing to do though when they show up in my reader before I’ve seen the prompt.

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 1:26 pm

      I know I have to get on and write my story when my email inbox starts to fill up with stories I don’t want to read yet!

      Like

  18. September 9, 2015 at 10:01 am

    And like Ms. Joshi I too neglected to say how much I enjoyed the story, sorry about that. Great story.

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 1:26 pm

      Thanks, I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  19. September 9, 2015 at 11:36 am

    Lovely. Live by the sword, die by the sword. She got too comfortable too soon.

    Like

    • September 9, 2015 at 1:27 pm

      She certainly did. After what she did she should have been watching her back.

      Liked by 1 person

  20. Life Lessons of a Dog Lover
    September 9, 2015 at 10:42 pm

    What twisted thoughts you have, she said admiringly!

    Like

    • September 10, 2015 at 7:03 am

      Thanks! I think 🙂
      It was that or a Paris romance and I can’t do romance so that would be a big fail.

      Liked by 1 person

  21. September 10, 2015 at 10:08 am

    Oooo I like that, and the little twist at the end 🙂

    Like

    • September 10, 2015 at 12:05 pm

      Thanks! I do like my little twists 🙂

      Like

  22. September 11, 2015 at 9:59 pm

    ahh, you are the man, DrAliman!
    I wanted her to win the manor, not fair after all her planning.
    OK, I’m a wee bit off.

    Like

    • September 13, 2015 at 5:49 am

      It does seem that after all her careful planning she should have at least got to enjoy her manor for a little while 🙂

      Like

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