FF – Man vs Bird
Here is my story for this week’s Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Roger Bultot.
To read the other stories, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright Roger Bultot
It was a day like any other, when…
“Woah, look up there! It’s like that film with all the birds.”
“’The Birds’?”
“Yeah, that’s the one. They’re gathering, ready to pluck out our eyeballs. Death by a thousand pecks. Man the guns!”
“Calm down, you’re overreacting. Ooh, wait, pigeon pie! Attack!”
Meanwhile, outside…
“Woah, look down there! It’s like that film with all the humans.”
“’The Humans’?”
“Yeah, that’s the one. They’re gathering, ready to shoot us out of the sky. Death by a thousand air rifles. Beaks on standby!”
“Calm down, you’re overreacting. Ooh, wait, they’ve got snacks! Attack!”
Mutually assured destruction.
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draliman on life 
Hah! That was hilarious – and I really enjoyed the nicely balanced points of view!
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Who knows what goes through the minds of birds? I’m glad you liked it!
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🙂 Birds are somewhat mysterious and have their own dark plans for all of us.
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I’ve always felt that 🙂
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🙂
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What a gem, Ali. This made me laugh. I like how we get both POVs. I’m siding with the birds!
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Me too, they have the advantage of height 🙂
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I’m still laughing. GOOD one. Though a true pigeon attack (per Mel Brooks) doesn’t need beaks. Pigeons have far more lethal weapons 🙂
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Soften them up with a good pooping, then in for the kill 🙂
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Very true we see ourselves in others. Be they human or avain, birds of a feather
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Exactly. There seems to be little difference between these two side.
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Oh, man, I can’t tell you how very much I really seriously needed such a good laugh! You’ve really made my week with this one. ROFLMAO! and then some! 🙂
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I’m really glad I gave you a good laugh 🙂
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I just might have to print me a copy to put in my “happy” book. Seriously. I could read this one over and over.
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Thank you! That would be an honour 🙂
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Beaks on standby lol
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Hee 🙂
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Ha! A great, fun twist on the prompt. I do always wonder what animals are thinking when they look at us – this could just be it 🙂
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I reckon so. Who knows what really goes through their minds as we wander past? 🙂
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I suspect it’s pretty basic -‘Is that a hawk?’ ‘Is that edible?’ ‘Get out of my territory!’ Apparently that’s all the dawn chorus is – lots of birds telling each other to clear off 🙂
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And here was me thinking they were welcoming the new day… 🙂
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Ah, if only nature was that sweet and reflective and not so ‘red in tooth and claw’ 🙂
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Hee Hee, laughing out loud 🙂
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I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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So glad you saw beyond the greyness, loved it.
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I’m glad you liked it! I tend to do darker stories in response to more cheerful photos.
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Last one standing gets all of the pie and snacks!
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Me, me! And the squirrels, waiting on the sidelines for the carnage to end…
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Fun and funny this week, Ali.
Personally, I’ve never been able to watch Hitchcock’s The Birds. When I was in preschool, a little boy in our neighborhood had his skull pecked away by big blackbirds. That movie touches a little to close to reality for me. It would be a true shame if all they wanted was our snacks.
All my best,
MG
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That sounds awful. We get the occasional injury here, usually when someone is holding a pasty or ice cream cone.
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LOL! Its like that movie with all the birds. HAHAHA!
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🙂
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Oh I loved this.
Mutual destruction indeed.
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Glad you liked it! They’re going to take each other out for sure.
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🙂
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Hilarious, Ali. POV’s coming from all directions. The moral of the story is “don’t carry snacks when the birds are gathering.”. Well done. 😀 — Suzanne
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Definitely best to keep the food out of sight 🙂
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LOL never thought of pigeons thinking the same way as us. But, oh yes, they will definitely attack for snacks. Well written Ali. 😀
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We get bird attacks here all the time (usually seagulls). I had an entire ice cream cone snatched once in Newquay 🙂
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And hot chips…seagulls just love hot chips!
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Me too! When the seagulls let me eat any…
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😀
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hihi 😀
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Glad you liked it 🙂
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“Ooh, wait, pigeon pie! Attack!” – that’s my favourite part! 😀
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🙂
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That was fun, Alistair! Why should these attacks be one-sided! Guffaws all ’round
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Exactly! Of course, it’s not going to end well 😦
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No…that is a sad truth…😢
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Dear Ali,
I saw The Birds as a child. Scared the youknowwhat out of me. Who knew that birds went to the movies? Oh yeah…Drive Ins. Duh. Love the two different thoughts going on here. Clever.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
I was quite young when I saw it too. It freaked me out somewhat! I’m glad you liked the story!
Ali
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Hehehe, love it. As someone above mentioned, they don’t even need beaks, gives the birds a clear advantage.
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Brilliant! It’s been a pig of a day and that really made me laugh. Thanks!
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I’m glad I was able to cheer up your day 🙂
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Hahaha! Play on words – SNACK ATTACK! LOL!
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Ha 🙂
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That was amazing! I liked how you wrote them from both POV.
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Thanks so much! I’m glad you enjoyed it. Which reminds me, I’ll have to get back to the Limericks. I got all Limericked out there for a bit 🙂
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I knew that snacks are deadly. Fat and salt…
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Tasty silent killers… 🙂
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Hahaha! I guess… the feeling is mutual? XD Clever take, Ali!
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Yeah, everyone wants something off the other. Thanks!
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True! XD
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ha ha. Every one has their own point of view. In this case the pigeons win! Nice story!
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Never go near a hungry pigeon with a snack. I’m glad you liked it!
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it made me feel like watching a cartoon on tv. well done. 🙂
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Ha, thanks 🙂
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I love this! ‘Mutually assured destruction’ indeed!
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Yep, they’re all goners 🙂
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Very funny well done. I read a newspaper story once stating that rats in London were almost at plague proportions, because there were nearly as many rats as humans in the city.I just imagined the rats reading the same story and asking, “If we’re at plague proportions and there’s less of us than you, what does that make you?”
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Thanks, I’m glad you liked it!
Now, there’s an interesting thought…
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Loved the view from both sides! The only thing is, now I’m a little scared to go out and fill up the bird bath this morning (The Birds.) lol.
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You should be – they’re watching 🙂
I’m glad you liked it!
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Yes, I always enjoy your writing, Draliman!
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Thanks 🙂
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I especially liked the birds point of view. But both made me smile. Fun story this week Ali.
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I’m glad you liked it! Who knew how human birds could be? 🙂
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Made me smile – thank you 🙂
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I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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So all we need for mutually assured destruction is have bird brains in charge on both sides 😉
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Ha, pretty much, yes 🙂
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LOL! As so many have said, what a great twist to this story – works so well, the two perspectives …. has me laughing at how clever the birds are. 😀
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Yeah, they’re more clever than we think. They’re just waiting for us to slip up so they can take over!
I’m glad you liked my story 🙂
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Haha–great story! I’d like to see “The Humans”! As always, I enjoyed the humor–“yeah, that’s the one!”
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“The Humans” is a real eye-opener. I’m glad you liked my story!
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Funny story. The double point of view is a great approach.
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Thanks, I’m glad you liked it! I like to think of the birds doing the same things and thinking the same way as us 🙂
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A great two-sided look at a the situation. Beaks versus guns … hmmm … It should be an interesting battle. Nice one.
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I’m betting on the birds. I’m glad you liked it!
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Loved it! I do wish that there were times we could hear both sides in a animal encounter!
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It would be a real eye-opener, I’m sure!
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