FF – Induction
Here is my post for the 100 word fiction challenge Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. The photo this week was supplied by Dale Rogerson.
A quick warning – I used the “f” word near the end as I felt it gave more impact to the story and served to emphasise the mood switch. Nothing else I tried had quite the same bite and I feel this guy would have said it.
To read this week’s other stories, click on the blue froggy!
Copyright Dale Rogerson
Cowled figures shrouded in darkness, we await the acolyte. Candles in alcoves light the way to the sacred chamber. All is in readiness. Ceremonial knives are razor-sharp; the sacrifice bleats in terror, bowls ready to receive its blood.
Our origins lost in the mists of time, our members few yet powerful, today we welcome another into our fold.
Movement! He approaches!
“Excuse me, I’m looking for the toilets… um… bloody hell, is that a goat?”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, another one! Back the way you came, second door on the left.”
“Um… thanks.”
Ahem. Cowled figures shrouded in darkness, we await the acolyte…
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draliman on life 
Hee hee, that undercut their ceremony a bit! Good one 🙂
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Isn’t it always the way? You go to all the effort, you’ve got the robes, the ambience, the goat…
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Hehe, very cute. It reminded me of Terry Pratchett’s humor. Great job.
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He’s my main inspiration, so thanks for the comparison!
I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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That was fun
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I’m glad you liked it!
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Ha! Good one.
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I’m glad you enjoyed it!
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Absolutely brilliant – especially ‘bloody hell, is that a goat?!
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I’m glad you liked it! I enjoyed imagining what the poor bloke was thinking when he walked in on their little ceremony 🙂
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You never know who you’ll bump into in public conveniences I guess!
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Hilarious! They need a new meeting place! 😀
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But the meeting room at the local pub is both cheap and conveniently located!
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As well as goat-friendly or unfriendly as the case may be 🙂
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I LOVE this!!! It truly made me laugh out loud .
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, another one!” “bloody hell, is that a goat?” “Ahem”
I don’t think you could have done any better with your lines. Kudos!
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I’m glad you enjoyed it! I almost panicked and toned down the language but that would have compromised the story.
🙂
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Lucky I put down my coffee before the last lines 🙂 Great story
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Spontaneous coffee spray is my goal. I’ll get you next time 🙂
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Looking forward to that!
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🙂
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Hilarious! I love the sudden shift in mood. Great story!
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I’m glad you enjoyed it! The mood shift made me smile too 🙂
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Love it! Kind of takes away the seriousness of the whole thing! You needed the f-bomb for sure!
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I thought so too. Anything else wouldn’t have had the same impact. I’m glad you enjoyed it, and thanks for the photo!
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Most welcome
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Funny and macabre, Ali. Though I’d expect no less from your diabolical (in a good way) mind! 🙂
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I enjoy a good mixture of light and dark. I’m glad you liked it!
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I used to work at the college radio station which everyone thought was the bathrooms. When it turned out otherwise, they would pee into the storm drain. It was a great little radio station, but smelly. I LOVE this one 🙂
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Hmm, sounds lovely 🙂 Maybe more signage was required.
I’m glad you enjoyed my story!
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For future reference, I’ve found that “Jeepers” is an excellent substitution for the “F” word.
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Thanks! I haven’t heard “Jeepers” in a while 🙂
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OMG! The F word! You have scarred me for life now!
Would it have killed them to put a sign on the door… “Live Sacrifices ONLY”?
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I’m sure it came as a terrible shock to you 🙂
I expect they thought a sign would detract from the mysterious nature of their ceremony. More fool them!
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Lol..Oops!
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It’s easy to get turned around down there… 🙂
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I was thinking he was lucky to get out lol
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They’ll do goats but draw the line at humans. They don’t make secret societies like they used to.
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Dear Ali,
Thank you for the warning in your intro. I’m sure there are some who might be offended. To those of us who weren’t it was perfect and added to the humor. A word fitly spoken given the circumstance.
On a side note…in my first novel I use the term ‘bloody bastard’ that was suggested might be too strong for a particular religious audience. After wrestling with it, trying other ways of getting the message across, I decided there was no other way to say it.
Sorry for being so verbose here. Good story. You made me laugh.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
Yes, I thought maybe some people might be offended so wanted to make sure those people stopped at that point – although a commonly-used word these days, it is pretty strong and not one I use much, even less so in writing.
However, like you I tried various alternatives and only this word put across the strength of his dismay and switched nicely from “dark and mysterious” to a humorous and almost farcical situation. I’m glad you thought the same, both in your novel and my story.
Anyhoo, I’m glad you enjoyed my story 🙂
Ali
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Ha, ha. Brilliant, Ali. Talk about finding yourself in the wrong place. This was great. 😀 — Suzanne
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The poor chap had no idea what was going on! I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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Ha ha, that was great! The photo reminded me of some sacred halls where mysterious rituals would take place, too — and I love how you mixed it up with the poor chap just looking for the loo. Wrong turn!
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I’m glad you liked it! My very first thought was of a hallway leading to some sort of ritual. Who knows where a wrong turn might take you…
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Someplace bad, apparently. With goats! 🙂
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I’m so very proud of you for using the “f” word. 🙂
Great story!
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I thought you would be. I finally found the courage 🙂
I’m glad you enjoyed my story!
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Yay!! 😀
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Hilarious… poor fellow. In India, I know of some villages where the brides are first shown a sacrificial goat’s head before they enter their new home. Great post Ali!
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Interesting – I wonder what the background to that custom is?
I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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It is mostly in the warrior clan… the belief is that it makes the bride brave! 😀😀😀.
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I guess it’s be brave or run away screaming 🙂
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Hahahaha
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Haha – you are SO good!
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Hee, thanks, I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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I’m so desensitised to the f-word it’s not even funny. 😉
That poor goat…please tell me it didn’t get hurt! Brilliant story.
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I don’t notice it much either, apart from those people who feel the need to inject it every second word or so.
I think the goat probably ended up going back to the farm. The mood has been ruined 🙂
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Yay for the goat! 😊
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🙂
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This is absolutely perfect. The mood switch definitely benefited from the f word
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Thanks, I thought so too. Nothing else I tried quite hit the spot!
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Nothing like someone searching for the loo to burst a serious ceremonial bubble. They really need to put a sign up pointing the way to the toilet. Love the narrator trying to rekindle the atmosphere 🙂
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Gents right, Ladies left, Acolytes straight ahead 🙂
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Haa haa haa yes, of course 😀
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Haha, yes, I suppose if you’re going to sacrifice a goat, you’re probably not squeamish about the “f” word! Love the humor combined with this grim ritual!
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It’s tough to be prim and proper when you’re covered in blood. I’m glad you liked it!
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i was relieved it was just a goat. 🙂
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It could so easily have been a pile of people looking for the toilets…
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Absolutely brilliant! Love it.
Click here to read my tale!
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Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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Brilliantly funny!
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Thanks 🙂
I’m glad you liked it!
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Perfect! Just the right ending. 🙂
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Thanks, I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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Very funny – love it!
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I’m glad you liked it!
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ROFL. You did such a good job setting the mood…and breaking it. Having the narrator start over again with his “ahem” is just icing on the already hilarious cake 😂
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The poor guy is trying his best under very difficult circumstances 🙂
I’m glad you enjoyed it!
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This was perfect fun. But that poor goat. Why can’t these people use their own blood?
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I get the feeling they’ll never actually get to the sacrifice – too many interruptions!
I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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😀
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Hahahahaha! That kind of did it in, as they say.
Five out of five Tasmanian Goat F—s (as our drill sergeant used to call us in basic training).
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I think they should just give up and go down the pub 🙂
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Excellent!
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Thanks! I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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I hope no goats were injured in the writing of this story 😉
I love the ‘is that a goat?’ part! Still smiling.
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No, it was a specially trained stunt goat 🙂
I’m glad you liked it!
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🙂
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A little jump back to normality for the cowled figures there! Cleverly done, and the language suits the situation well. 🙂
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Thanks, I’m glad you liked it! Maybe if they have a whip-round they’ll be able to afford a more secluded meeting place.
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Very, clever, very thoughtful. The innocent interloper is hilarious and I love the way the high priest or whatever he is suddenly loses all his pompous ceremonial speech.
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The high priest has finally had enough, poor guy. I’m glad you enjoyed it!
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MOL…I thought it was getting more dangerous in the end, Draliman, especially when the goat appeared…MOL 😀 Pawkisses for the day 🙂 ❤
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Fortunately it doesn’t look like they’re going to get to the goat, with all the interruptions 🙂
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Great story – I could see it as a TV sketch.
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Thanks! Yes, that would be cool 🙂
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LOL
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🙂
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tsk tsk
They really aren’t many good cults again.
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In my day, being in a cult really meant something…
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Wonderful, Ali. 🙂 I can imagine the conversation when that interloper finds his way back to his friends… “They even had a goat!”
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And of course then they’d have to go and take a look… 🙂
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Nothing like needing to use the toilet to shift attention to the ordinary. Nice story.
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Nothing more prosaic than that. I’m glad you liked it!
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Totally brilliant..I cherish this!!! It genuinely made me roar with laughter…
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I’m glad you liked it! It was fun to write, made me smile as well 🙂
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