Home > Just Silly > On the First Day of Christmas…

On the First Day of Christmas…

On the first day of Crizz-muzz, my true love sent to meeeeeeee,

A bill for a pretty pe-nneeeeeee.



Well Merry f*cking Christmas to you too, Water Company.


Have any of you got home all excited to see mail on your doorstep right before Christmas, only to have reality come crashing back in?


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  1. NotAPunkRocker
    December 23, 2014 at 6:51 pm

    If it’s any consolation, your quarterly water bill is less than mine over three months (mine gets added to the rent each month).

    Maybe next time it will be nine ladies dancing? 🙂


    • December 23, 2014 at 7:22 pm

      It was actually estimated but I can’t be bothered to go out in the cold and dark to read it. They’ll read it next time! It averages out about £10 more, which still isn’t too bad.
      It helps that I don’t do any laundry or washing up and haven’t showered since 1995. Just kidding 🙂

      Ooh, ooh, nine ladies dancing, do you really think so? 🙂


      • NotAPunkRocker
        December 23, 2014 at 7:38 pm

        Just estimated? Your true love sounds lazy.

        You never know what may show up…I am still hoping for the pipers to show up here!


        • December 23, 2014 at 8:20 pm

          Yeah, I know, right? How hard is it to pop round and lift a little metal cover up?

          Good luck with the pipers!


  2. December 23, 2014 at 7:12 pm

    Yes I have! I was all excited that I had finished shopping early and remembered everyone. Except I forgot about Car Insurance!!! 😦 dang! broker than I thought… at least the food is bought and the gifts are wrapped. Woohoo!!!


    • December 23, 2014 at 7:24 pm

      Boo 😦

      At least you got the food and presents bought!
      I pay everything else by direct debit so the water bill always takes me by surprise.


      • December 23, 2014 at 7:28 pm

        Car insurance is direct debit… oops… 😦
        But yea so excited that I’m not scrambling to get presents now. (that would be the norm).

        Wishing you a wonderful Holiday! (HUGS)


  3. December 23, 2014 at 7:39 pm

    You must have been a very good boy. I guess I compare that to rebuilding my well and it looks like … well … a gift 🙂


    • December 23, 2014 at 8:22 pm

      Yeah, no comparison really. It’s not a lot when you consider what they have to do to get it to me.


  4. December 23, 2014 at 8:49 pm

    Ali, We get water from the city and still have to buy bottled water. At the level our flat is on the water pressure isn’t enough for the filter to work since the city cut down on the supply. Every year there’s a water shortage just before the monsoon hits and they’re still building more and more flats. Same with electricity. Of course, if they found all the leaks it would greatly increase. Leaks, illegal connections, etc. account, I believe I read, for about 1/4 of the water. Of course the city can’t find any maps of water lines that were laid, so that poses a bit of a problem. Anyway, Merry Christmas to you and yours! 🙂 — Suzanne


    • December 24, 2014 at 8:11 am

      A lot of water gets lost via leaks here as well. They discovered that some of the pipes in London were so old they had completely disintegrated and the water was just running through the hole that was left!
      Merry Christmas to you too 🙂


  5. December 24, 2014 at 3:29 am

    I must be living under the wrong government… they don’t make any contribution to my water bill!


    • December 24, 2014 at 8:15 am

      It’s a special thing for Cornwall. The water companies are responsible for all non-privately-owned coastline and although some of the Cornish coast is owned by the National Trust that still leaves a lot. Because Cornwall has so much coast (it’s a peninsula basically), that means that our water bills are massively higher than other, much richer parts of the country.
      So the government contributes (this year anyway) £50 to each household to help out 🙂


  6. merbear74
    December 24, 2014 at 2:10 pm

    Yes. All the damn time. 🙂


    • December 24, 2014 at 4:38 pm

      I got a text earlier and thought it might be someone wishing me a merry Christmas. It was one of my Visa cards kindly inviting me to pay my bill. Don’t these people know it’s Christmas?

      All the rest of the country’s post is suffering backlogs and delays, but somehow my water bill made it through.


  7. December 29, 2014 at 4:42 pm

    Yea reality rolls right on in.


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