Sharing My World 09-12-2018

December 9, 2018 21 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

What are the most important lesson(s) you’ve learned in life?
I’ve learned tons of really profound things. Don’t run with scissors. Don’t leave a heater balanced precariously on the edge of the bath regardless of how cold the bathroom is. Important stuff.

How did you meet your husband/wife or significant other? How did you know he/she was “the one”?
Ah, yes. My significant other. I wasn’t sure but everyone at work told me to go for it. So I did! How did I know my significant other was “the one”? When I saw those graphics. Magic! Me and my PlayStation 4 are very happy together, thanks for asking.

If you could take a year-long paid sabbatical, what would you do?
I’d get bored, I would imagine. And I’d feel guilty the whole time because getting paid for doing nothing doesn’t feel right.

What is your favourite thing to buy at a movie theatre concession stand?
One sec while I run that through the translator… ah, yes, the little shop in the cinema that sells coffee and popcorn.

Nothing. I buy nothing from the little shop in the cinema that sells coffee and popcorn.

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FF – All in a Day’s Work

December 5, 2018 72 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Dawn M. Miller.

Copyright Dawn M. Miller

 

009 grimaced as he flew out the train window. Twisting his body to avoid the girders, he shot past the decomposing corpse of 004. Popular spot for chucking spies off trains…

Hitting the water, he struggled to the bank where a local wrapped him in a blanket, pointing to his shack.

“Welcome, Unfortunate Spies!” was written in seventeen different languages.

Very popular spot…

The local offered him the “Spy Pack” – fake passport, gadget watch, Walther PPK. 009 upgraded to “Deluxe”, which included bullets. Gonna need those…

Shooting the enterprising local (loose end) he headed off. All in a day’s work.

 

Sharing My World 02-12-2018

December 2, 2018 26 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

If your five year old self woke up in your current body, what would happen, what would you say?
I (my five year old self) would say something like “Ooh, what dose aches evewywhere, dis not good, where my mummy? Waaah who dat in da miwwor, dat not me!”

What is a relationship deal breaker for you? Whether you are talking about a romantic one, a friendship or a related to sort of relationship?
When she comes at me with a kitchen knife. That’s generally when I start to feel that things aren’t going to work out.

Is there something out there, a thought, an idea, a current event, or a fear that you find deeply unsettling?
Pretty much everything 😦

If you were arrested with no explanation, what would your friends and family assume you had done?
Ooh, how mysterious! No explanation, eh? That sounds like some sort of national security thing. How exciting! I’ll probably just disappear without a trace. My friends and family would be clueless, clueless I say!

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FF – Worst First Date Ever

November 28, 2018 81 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Nick Allen.

This one’s a bit icky, to the point where I was going to change the last line, but I think it’s funny so it stays 🙂

Just in case you can’t see it, the brand on the far left can is “Braime”.

Copyright Nick Allen

 

“And here we have a 1965 ‘blue oil’…”

“Right.”

“… and an original ‘red’…”

“Ooookaaaay…”

“… and this is a genuine 1932 tractor oil can… genuine! I bet you’re surprised, eh?”

“I am. Your dating profile didn’t mention any of this.”

“I don’t like to give too much away!”

“I really think you should have.”

“And my favourite…”

“Oh, Christ.”

“… ‘Blue Braime’. Shall we move to the bedroom? Braime’s oil is smooth, sensual…”

(gagging) “Um, ah, is that my phone? my dog’s been abducted by aliens? gotta go, bye…”

Slam

“Huh. Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, Braime…”

 

Sharing My World 25-11-2018

November 25, 2018 22 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.


Are you an early to bed, early to rise person, a night owl and day sleeper/dozer, or an ‘I’ll sleep when I’m dead’ person?
It’s early to bed, early to rise for me. Roughly 10pm to 6am on a school night. I do have a nap after lunch when I’m not working, though. I do enjoy my afternoon nap 🙂

What are some misconceptions about your hobby, should you have a hobby?
People think that those like me who spend all their time on the PlayStation, eschewing all social real-world contact, are sad pathetic loners. This couldn’t be further from the truth! I fully intend to talk to a real person one day. Maybe even in the new year!

So there.

A penguin walks through the door right now wearing a sombrero. What does he say and why is he here?
The poor, confused little guy. All out of place, miles from the chilly Antarctic wastes. His friends must be worried about him.  I’ll invite him in for dinner.

Mmm, tastes like chicken.

Only kidding 🙂 I’d phone the Royal Society for the Repatriation of Penguins and get him home.

Aliens have landed… do they come in peace?
Probably. But, being humans, we decided not to take the chance so we blew them up as they came in for a landing. Hopefully they didn’t get off a call to their mothership…

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FF – A Disappointing Day Out

November 21, 2018 62 comments

Here is my not really a story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Dale Rogerson.

Any resemblance to any persons alive or dead is quite possible 🙂

Copyright Dale Rogerson

 

“Well, this is disappointing,” grumbled Dail. “What did the advert say?”

“Hmm,” replied Rocheel, “’Biggest falls in Canada, terrifying rapids’.”

“What? A trickle of water, plummeting six inches to the pool below?”

“Well, I’m going for it. If one can, one must!” misquoted Rocheel, donning her life preserver and jumping in, to be instantly submerged to her ankles in the ‘terrifying rapids’.

Following her friend, Dail jumped in her canoe, only to be immediately grounded on an inconvenient pebble.

“Huh,” she said. “Rubbish. Well, best take a photo. Maybe a Friday Fictioneer can make a story out of this whole debacle…”

 

Sharing My World 20181118

November 18, 2018 16 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

What’s the most ironic thing you’ve ever witnessed?
No idea. I’m sure over the years I’ve witnessed some doozies but I can’t remember them. I do sometimes get a great situation at work where the system tells me there’s been some sort of error, but it can’t tell me what it is because the error reporting system has also experienced an error. That’s pretty ironic.

Let’s talk turkey. Pro or con? If pro, which part do you enjoy most? Is it for Thanksgiving (American Style any way) only?
Obviously we don’t have Thanksgiving in the UK – over here we traditionally eat turkey on Christmas Day. I like the breast meat best as do most of us, and Dad takes the legs.

If you’d like, share one thing you wish you’d said to someone else, but now you’ll never have the chance.
I can’t think of anything but that’s for the best. Let’s not dwell on missed opportunities.

What odd smell do you really enjoy?
Another blogger mentioned petrol (well she’s American so she called it “gasoline”) and that made me think, me too! Only in the proper place, mind. I wouldn’t be so keen if I smelled it in my house, or while I’m driving down the road…

Thankful November… share a story or time when someone did something really great for you. Alternatively, share your gratitude moments during this past week.
Number 15 is back! Yes, folks, it’s true. Three recycling collections (6 weeks) ago, Number 15 was appropriated by another household, leaving me with an older more tatty cardboard recycling bag. But this week, Number 15 came home! Welcome back, Number 15!

Categories: About draliman