Sharing My World 14-09-2020

September 20, 2020 13 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World, once again augmented by “Harry Potter-themed” questions from Roger Shipp.

You have just been gifted a magic wand that specialises in completing household chores. You can request the completion of only two household chores. Which chores would you assign your wand to complete?
Well, this wand is a bit disappointing, to be honest. Only two chores? Vacuuming and cleaning the oven. My oven’s instructions said it was self-cleaning, so I never cleaned it. And it’s filthy. So that needs doing.

At the local Wizards-R-Us store there was a sale on handshake shockers, instant darkness pellets, and levitation pills. Which of these ‘party thrillers’ are you more likely to purchase?
The instant darkness pellets. They’d be useful in all sorts of situations, like random street muggings and the like.

In the alley behind Wizards-R-Us, there was a tradesman selling a Love Potion. The sales pitch was too much for you and you yielded and purchased one vial. What do you do with it?

COMBINED WITH

You are the Great Clearinghouse Winner of a new ‘good luck’ potion – Felix Felicis. It has to be used within the next thirty days or its potency becomes diminished. Do you use it? Do you give it to a friend in need?
Yes, I’m combining these two. Think of the “significant other” I could hook with these two babies in my “chat up” arsenal.

If everyone spoke their mind, would this world be a better or worse place? Why?
It would be simpler but a disaster. Think of how many people would get beaten up by strangers, fired from their jobs, divorced by their partner…

Can achieving nothing make a person happy?
Yeah, if they’re really lazy and unambitious. Like me.

How do you know if you love someone enough to marry them?
You never will. Take a chance.

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FF – Nuthead and Numbnuts Have a Picnic

September 16, 2020 45 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Roger Bultot.

Copyright Roger Bultot

 

“Here we are, Nuthead! A nice picnic.”

“Yes, Numbnuts, lovely. Is this where we meant to go? Never mind. Spread out the food!”

“Food?”

“Dang!”

“I remembered the baby chair.”

“Good-oh. But that makes me think we’ve forgotten something.”

“The food?”

“Something else.”

“The baby! We forgot the baby!”

“Omygodomygodomygod…”

“Wait a sec. We don’t have a baby.”

“Oh, that’s a relief. I thought for a minute we’d left him slash her at the supermarket slash petrol station slash home.”

“Phew! Though we do have a baby chair.”

“But why?”

“I forget. Let’s go home.”

“Yes, let’s. Where’s that again?”

 

Sharing My World 07-09-2020

September 13, 2020 23 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World, co-hosted by Roger Shipp with his Harry Potter-inspired questions.

What happened to cause you to discover ‘bullies” were real?
It was when I went to “big” school. It was just low-grade bullying. I only ever got punched once and that was right in front of a teacher. Heh heh.

Eavesdropping – When given the chance, how often do you eavesdrop?
I don’t really eavesdrop. I just sometimes hear other people’s conversations 🙂

Escalators, at one time, were the ‘next big thing’. When was the last time you rode an escalator?
Whenever I was last in Marks & Spencer. They have an escalator up to the first floor (if you’re American that’s probably the “second floor”), which is where menswear is. That was at some point before lockdown.

Have you ever ‘let’ someone win in a sports competition or a board game? How did it turn out?
Nope. I don’t think that does anyone any favours. No, you lost, get over it! Stop crying and man up, you snivelling little three year old!

Do our fears start with our DNA?
For sure. I’m terrified of DNA.

If you could have your hair any colour for 24 hours, what colour would you choose?
I’d leave it the way it is. Brown with edges of grey. Very distinguished, I reckon 🙂

When do you think a person gets old?
When they’re around 10 years older than me.

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FF – Spy Games

September 9, 2020 61 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by herself!

 

“Look, that altered ‘open’ sign. That’s the signal!”

“Hmm. Are you sure, Sir? Maybe the neighbourhood kids…”

“Yes! Come on!”

ding!

“Hello, my good man. Ahem. The biscuits dunk well in the Darjeeling.”

“Huh?”

The biscuits dunk well in the Darjeeling.

“Your mate… bit ‘odd’ is he? A sandwich short of a picnic?”

“Um, Sir, I don’t think we’re in the right place…”

“Nonsense! I’m sure that is the correct counter-response. Um. Ahem. Yes! Here, my good man, the microfilm.”

“Um, okay.”

ding!

“Best put this with the others. Seven microfilms today! Maybe I better get my ‘open’ sign fixed. Damn kids.”

 

Sharing My World 31-08-2020

September 6, 2020 23 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World, co-hosted by Roger “Harry Potter” Shipp. This week we’re up to “The Goblet of Fire”.

Many local regions, especially rural areas where I live, have haunted houses. Have you ever spent the night in a house that was supposedly haunted? Anything ‘strange” happen?
I’ve not heard of any haunted houses around here. Nearby we have “The Beast of Bodmin Moor”, so it’s probably best not to go there after dark. Though it’s probably just an escaped jaguar or tiger or something. Nothing to worry about 😉

The Quidditch Cup (riding broomsticks while chasing a small ball) was a huge sporting event in the land of Hogwarts. What is the largest sporting event (or concert, etc.) that you have ever attended?
I can’t think of any large sporting events. I went to a few concerts while I lived in Germany way back when. The biggest were probably Paul Simon’s “Rhythm of the Saints” tour, and Iron Maiden.

When you go for a swim, do you prefer an ocean, the seaside lakes, or a pool?
What on earth’s a “seaside lake”? Not one of those, then. I swam in the sea a couple of times as a kid, but a pool sounds the best thing to me. Nice and safe.

Ron Weasley received a horrid robe to wear as formal wear to the Christmas dance at Hogwarts. Tell about the most ‘ghastly’ fashion statement that you have ever made.
Excuse me, I’m the very epitome of fashion. Jeans and a jumper never go out of style.

What is the last song you sang along to?
I tend to have songs going round in my head rather than singing aloud. Except in the car, and that would have been whatever was playing, I sing along in the car all the time.

What was your scariest nightmare about?
Like I can remember the details… I should have answered this in the 2 minutes after actually having the nightmare, after that the details float away. I’m just left with an uneasy feeling.

What food do you crave most often?
Either chocolate or cheese, depending on whether my body needs sugar or wants savoury.

What’s your grossest bug story?
I can’t think of anything in particular. Bugs are gross. end of story.

Nemesis

Categories: About draliman

FF – Bloody Tourists

September 2, 2020 67 comments

Here is my contribution for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by C.E. Ayr.

Copyright C.E. Ayr

 

“Oh, how very ‘olde worlde’! Costumed inhabitants, old cars! I think I’ll try some of the ‘olde worlde’ ale! A pint of your finest, my good man.”

“’Ere. Free pahnd fifty.”

“Three pounds fifty? Surely you mean ‘a shilling and six pence, guvnor’?”

“Nah. I mean free pahnd fifty. Guvnor.”

“Oh, well, okay. Hey, this tastes just like regular ale! What about the ‘olde worlde’ experience?”

“Fine. Give it ‘ere.”

(sprinkle tinkle)

“’Ere. Olde worlde experience.”

“Aha! Urk, yeech, bleurgh! Yes, very olde worlde…”

*****

“Frank, you’ve been serving ages. Need a toilet break?”

“Nah, just ‘ad one. Har har. Bloody tourists.”

 

Sharing My World 24-08-2020

August 30, 2020 26 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World, this week co-hosted by Roger Shipp who has provided Harry Potter-themed questions.

One of my favourite gifts that Harry Potter received came from the Weasley Twins; and was “Mrs. Mooney’s Marauder’s Map”. This magical document showed every classroom, hallway and secret corner in all of Hogwarts. It also showed you the location- by name- of every person in Hogwarts. If you had such a magical map of your town, what would you use it for? If you would not use it, is there another person to whom you would gift it?
I would have liked one of my school way back when. I don’t know what I’d do with one of my town. It would be quite useful for burglars! Maybe I’d gift it to the police, that would be a very useful intelligence tool.

When was the last time you made a snowball? Were in a snowball fight?
Way back when I was a kid. We don’t get much snow down here, and it doesn’t stay “usable” for long.

Many cultures set great value in each child of the family having godparents. Did you have godparents? Are you a godparent yourself?
I did have godparents though I can’t remember them. I am a godparent to a toddler.

You have found a secret tunnel under your house. Where does it go?
It goes to the Dralicave, of course. My secret base from which I secretly control the world bwahahaha.

Is intelligence or wisdom more useful?
Wisdom comes first. Intelligence without wisdom can be dangerous.

How important is play in living a healthy and fulfilling life?
It depends on the “play”. Although PlayStation has the word “play” in it, I don’t think it’s making me any healthier…

Is happiness just chemicals flowing through your brain or something more?
The actual feeling is chemicals, just like everything else. You have to get yourself into that state to get the “happy” chemicals flowing, though.

Categories: About draliman Tags:

FF – Children of Light

August 26, 2020 61 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by J. Hardy Carroll.

 

They called them “Children of Light”.

They came from a far distant planet. And they glowed. All the time.

They were welcomed by the Humans. Light sources. Energy sources. Even circus performers.

Within a year they were everywhere. Homes, shops, businesses. Militaries. Governments.

Perfectly positioned…

Fortunately for the Humans, the Children of Light were friendly and quite happy to be used as light bulbs.

But beware, Humans! I have learnt from this. For I am disguising my invasion army as useful widgets. And we’re a right nasty bunch of belligerent bastards. Your planet shall be ours!

See you soon.

 

Sharing My World 17-08-2020

August 23, 2020 30 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World, this week co-hosted by Roger Shipp.

Harry Potter can speak to snakes. If you were able to have conversations with any one animal, what animal would you like to speak to? What would be the topic of your first conversation?
Mice. They get everywhere. They shall be my spies, and I shall rule the world BWAHAhahahaha!

The portraits in Hogwart’s dormitories can talk. If your graduation portrait could speak to people passing it by, what would it tell them?
It would say “meh”.

Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger use the Pollyjuice Potion for finding new clues for the happenings at Hogwarts. (The Pollyjuice Potion is a magic potion that allows your body to form into that of another and live their life for a few hours.) If you could transform into another being, who would you chose to be? What would you hope to learn?
I wouldn’t be much good at being someone else. I’m sure I’d blow my cover within seconds, no matter what I looked like.

There was a flooding in the girl’s bathroom where Moaning Myrtle resides. What has been the most dangerous (or comical) ‘flooding’ where you reside?
I can’t recall any flooding incidents anywhere I’ve ever lived.

How do you think you’ll die? If you do think about it?
I don’t really think about it, that’s a bit morbid!

What’s the best on-line screen name you’ve seen? “Best might mean the oddest.
I’m sure I’ve seen a few, but that’s not something I remember.

What’s invisible that you wish people could see?
My awesomeness 😉

If over time you replace parts on a car, at what point does it stop being the same car you bought? How many parts do you need to replace to make it a new car?
l’m going to repeat my answer from last August as it was rather witty:

The rear view mirror. That’s the thing. Once you’ve replaced that it’s the beginning of the end. Because you’ll never get a new one to stick to the windscreen. There’s your new car right there.

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FF – What a Relief!

August 19, 2020 60 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Ted Strutz.

Copyright Ted Strutz

 

“I hope my friends are okay in the haunted house. Here I am, stuck viewing everything through this monitor they gave me.”

“Surprise!”

“Huh?”

“Hi, we’re with PRANK TV! We removed the colour via the monitor to make the house look haunted! You’ve been PRANKED!”

“Wow!”

“I’ll tweak the settings… here’s the colour back. Not so haunted-looking now… oh, shit.”

 

Original copyright Ted Strutz

 

“No, it’s not. Phew!”

“Um, about your friends…”

“Thank goodness they’re not in a haunted house! I’ll just wait here for my friends to come back out, then.”

“Um. About that. Yeah. I wouldn’t bother waiting…”