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FF – Out of Ideas

May 23, 2018 54 comments

Here is my “not really a story” for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Rochelle.

I was a bit stumped this week and didn’t have a lot of time.

 

“Okay then, here goes…

“The mists rolled ominously across the moors. Bethwick drew a deep breath, cocked his rifle and strode out into the gloom. Suddenly…”

“Hang on, what’s this?”

“My photo prompt story.”

“You’re supposed to be writing about a weed in an ash tray.”

“Shh, keep it down. That’s probably her prize crystal serving dish.”

“It’s definitely a weed, though.”

“Yeah, I’ll give you that. Okay, ditch the tale of intrigue and murder out on the misty moors. Take two!”

“There once was a weed which lived in an ash… I’m not feeling it. Pub?”

“Yeah.”

 

FF – Wrath of the Gods

May 16, 2018 84 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was submitted by Courtney Wright from an anonymous source.

Heh. I started smiling the instant I saw this and within 5 minutes my story was all typed in. So you can probably guess it’s not one of those “cerebral” ones. You know, like the ones I never write.

Copyright anonymous, submitted by Courtney Wright

 

“Wow. Sure they’re Chaeron’s boots?”

“Verily. They were still smoking when I arrived.”

“You think Zeus finally zapped him for his blasphemy?”

“Maybe. Wait though, who’s this? Hey, it’s Chaeron!”

“It worked! My teleporter! It worked! It zapped me clear over the other side of the village! Left my boots behind. Needs a little adjustment.”

“Yeah, Chaeron. Sure it did. C’mon, Callinus, let’s go.”

“No, wait, it did work! I am all powerful! More powerful than even feeble Zeus! The gods will tremble…”

Zap! Bang! Fizz!

“What was that flash of light?”

“Dunno. Can you smell barbecue? I smell barbecue.”

 

Pegman – A Wales by Any Other Name

May 14, 2018 26 comments

Here is my post for What Pegman Saw. This week Pegman is in Gwynedd, Wales. It’s been a few weeks since I’ve contributed 😦

The photo I chose is of the Cross Foxes Inn where I stayed a few years ago on a little holiday. My story is more inspired by Wales than in Wales, and I’ve popped a couple of photos at the end which I took while I was there.

Copyright Google

 

“At last week’s product meeting we tasked Barry to give us all his view on the market in Wales. Barry?”

“Thank you Alyssa. Ahem. Whales. Monsters of the sea. Grand, majestic…”

“Uh, Barry…”

“… blubber for oil, bone for corsets…”

“Barry, stop! Not only are you horribly out of date but we need your product evaluation for Wales, not whales. Next week?”

“Okay, sorry.”

Next week…

“Okay folks, sorry about last week. Barry, if you will?”

“Thank you. Ahem. Wails. Screams. Screeches. The banshee’s call of dooooom. A weapon of awesome power, to monetise as we see fit…”

“BARRY! Wales. The country.”

“Oh, shit. Sorry everyone. Next week, I promise. A fully comprehensive breakdown of product opportunities in Wales. The country.”

Next week…

“Wales. Damn pretty. Hills, rivers, forests. Nothing we can sell them. They have it all. Luvvvvly.”

“Barry? You’re right. And you’re fired.”

 

Waterfall in Wales

A waterfall in Coed y Brenin forest park, Wales

Coed y Brenin

Copyright me

FF – Letter to Mama

May 9, 2018 64 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Jill Wisoff.

After my last dark stories I was really in the mood for more gruesomeness this week but I don’t want people to start to worry about me 🙂 so I’ve ended up with this. As you can probably tell from the title “Letter to Mama” there will be no violence, unless it’s like “Dear Mama, I ritually disembowelled another heretic today. How is Papa?” or something.

I wrote a third person one and a letter one and went with the letter one in the end.

Copyright Jill Wisoff

 

Dear Mama,

I have arrived! So many strange sights. Though dressed in loincloth and carrying my spear, no-one seems to care. Many strange people are here!

Today I glanced up and saw a wonderful omen. Yellow eyes, red cheeks, spiked hat… yes, Mama. The god Meechakukuwhawha (photo enclosed)! These people also worship the god of the harvest, procreation and anteaters. How wonderful!

Later, I obtained a “chilli dog” from a street vendor. I do not know what dogs they have in Chile and hoped it would be Chihuahua within the bun, but I fear not.

Your loving son,

Natwahu

 

FF – He Seemed Like Such a Nice Man

May 2, 2018 91 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Karen Rawson.

For some reason a very dark story occurred to me this week, sorry.

Copyright Karen Rawson

 

He glanced behind as his family struggled up the slope, grinning as his youngest fell and slipped into the muddy water. Lashing out he threw his wife against a tree. His eldest ran past and he tripped her, laughing as she tumbled down. He was free, free…!

Jerked suddenly awake, he hears the grating, whining voice of his wife even from inside his shed. The kids are arguing. Again. Plagued in dreams and wakefulness! Something snaps inside, white and red flashes in his brain. He grabs his axe and stalks towards the house.

“… he seemed like such a nice man…”

 

FF – Marital Bliss

April 25, 2018 86 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Jan Wayne Fields.

I tried a bit of present tense this week to try to make it seem more “immediate”. Or whatever. I had major issues with the word count, much rewording was required!

Copyright Jan Wayne Fields

 

“How about a photo, my darling? Move a bit closer to the edge, it’ll be more dramatic. Look at the view.” A couple more yards, then I’ve got you…

“Of course dearest. It’s lovely!”

She reaches the edge and he charges forward, arms outstretched, face murderous, triumphant. Oblivious, she bends to rummage in her bag. Eyes wide, he trips over her and falls, smashing on the rocks below.

“Oh my. How… unfortunate. And messy. Well, this is more ‘accidental-looking’. It’s so hard to explain a stab wound.“

She places the knife back in her bag, dials the police, and smiles.

 

Pegman – Revelations on Safari

April 22, 2018 50 comments

Here is my story for What Pegman Saw. This week we’re going to Botswana. Tell you what, I must have looked at 100 photospheres before I found one that had animals in it. And you can barely see them.

My story has three people but it’s hopefully easy enough to work out who’s speaking.

Copyright Alexandre Suplicy/Google Maps

 

“Dada, what dey giwaffies doin’?”

“They’re having lunch, little one.”

“An’ Dada, what is dey zebwas doin’?”

“They’re, um… oh my. One for you, darling!”

“Of course, my love. The zebras are… getting to know each other, because they love each other very very much. And they’re very very nice.”

“Oh. Then you mus’ be vewy vewy nice too, Mama, ‘cos jus’ last week you was getting’ to know da gardener and da pool man and da pizza dewivewy man an’…”

“Uh, my sweet, what is she saying…?”

“Haha just ignore her my love haha the deluded ravings of a confused child haha such an imagination must get it from your mother haha did she say something I didn’t hear her say anything oh look baby elephants let’s go and see the baby elephants…” (races off with the kids)

“Um. Shit.”