Home > Fiction > Major Demotion – MFtS

Major Demotion – MFtS

It’s Monday, and there’s a story which needs finishing. Yes, it’s Mondays Finish the Story! This is a 150 word flash fiction challenge hosted by Barbara Beacham where we get a photo and a starting sentence (which doesn’t count towards the word count).

The supplied sentence is in bold in my story, and don’t forget to click on the blue froggy to read the other stories.



On March 9th, 2015, three objects were reportedly seen in the skies over the Borracho Todos los Tiempos Vineyards.

Major Dickens couldn’t believe his eyes.

“Corporal, any radar contacts?”

“No, Sir!”

Nothing on radar, but visible through his binoculars. Aliens! Aliens were invading Earth, and on his watch! He reached for the radio.

“General, three inbound bogies, alien origin!”

“Major, are you sure? You have been to the therapist regarding your alien fixation, yes?”

“Absolutely sure this time, Sir!” replied Dickens. Around him troops were staring at the sky, shrugging and shaking their heads.

“Right,” said the General. “I’ve contacted the President and mobilised our forces.”

“Yessir!” replied Dickens. He looked again. There they were, hanging above the distant trees.

The corporal, shaking his head, wiped the water from the Major’s binoculars with his sleeve.

“Ah, General…”


“False alarm, sir! Rain on the binoculars, Sir!”

“Right, Captain, I’ll call the President back, shall I?”

“Um, it’s ‘Major’, Sir…”

“This isn’t good enough, Lieutenant,” continued the General. “Don’t let it happen again. Carry on, Sergeant.”


  1. March 9, 2015 at 7:38 pm

    The fastest descent down the ladder of success EVER.


    • March 9, 2015 at 7:40 pm

      I think he’s cried “alien invasion” one time too many 😦


      • March 10, 2015 at 7:46 am

        Great way of putting it. … 😦


        • March 10, 2015 at 8:21 am

          Well, at least he didn’t just send an email… 🙂


  2. March 9, 2015 at 8:17 pm

    Ahahaha! Fantastic. 😀


    • March 9, 2015 at 8:42 pm

      I’m glad you enjoyed learning how Major Demotion came by his unfortunate nickname 🙂


  3. March 9, 2015 at 9:16 pm

    You mean Sergant Demotion? LOL! This was hilarious! 😀 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • March 10, 2015 at 8:16 am

      Hopefully he won’t stay a sergeant for long. He has big plans! Glad you liked it 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. March 9, 2015 at 10:15 pm

    Very funny, rapid demotion indeed…..


  5. March 9, 2015 at 10:55 pm

    It’s those little things in life that will bite you in the butt every single time!


    • March 10, 2015 at 8:17 am

      Yep. I guess if there ever is an alien invasion nobody will believe him…

      Liked by 1 person

  6. March 9, 2015 at 11:51 pm

    Loved your story! The little bit with the therapist…very telling! Loved the demotion too! Thank you for participating again, and I look forward to reading more of what you write next time! Be well… ^..^

    Liked by 1 person

    • March 10, 2015 at 8:18 am

      Glad you enjoyed reading about Dickens’ meteoric fall through the ranks!

      Liked by 1 person

      • March 10, 2015 at 5:11 pm

        Very good story, and the bit with the therapist was a nice touch!


        • March 10, 2015 at 7:48 pm

          Thanks! It sounds like his therapist hasn’t quite gotten to the bottom of his alien fixation yet 🙂

          Liked by 1 person

  7. March 10, 2015 at 2:19 am

    Poor Corporal Dickens….


    • March 10, 2015 at 8:19 am

      Ha! But why stop at corporal when there are so many mistakes left to make? He’ll be cleaning out the latrines before you know it.


  8. March 10, 2015 at 3:56 am

    Loved it! I really laughed at the therapy bit.


  9. Lyn
    March 10, 2015 at 9:03 am

    Raindrops on the binoculars… poor guy, you have to feel sorry for him. I guess we can be thankful that he isn’t in charge of UNIT or NORAD. Great story, D-man, and not a drop of blood or gore in sight 😀


    • March 10, 2015 at 2:33 pm

      I reckon he keeps getting to be almost in charge of things, then he makes an awful mistake 😦 Nice Dr Who reference!
      I do actually miss the blood and gore. But I’ve done a lot of humour recently. Blood and gore is not everyone’s cup of tea 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  10. March 10, 2015 at 10:23 am

    I think you’ve been reading my service records! LOL – this was really good.


    • March 10, 2015 at 4:10 pm

      I hope I didn’t bring back any bad memories!
      Glad you enjoyed it.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. March 10, 2015 at 2:57 pm

    Very entertaining read…:)


  12. March 10, 2015 at 5:51 pm

    Incredibly rapid demotion for the bungling major …er … sergeant. A very funny and enjoyable little scene. 🙂


    • March 10, 2015 at 7:49 pm

      I get the feeling he spends his whole career yo-yoing up and down the ranks 🙂
      Glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. March 10, 2015 at 11:33 pm

    … Well, I like your brand of blood and and gore.
    Great story, needed a few flying body parts.


    • March 11, 2015 at 12:41 pm

      I’ll try to incorporate some flying body parts into an upcoming story 🙂


  14. March 11, 2015 at 5:36 pm

    Someone forgot his medication today. But that’s Private (ahr ahr ahr).


  15. March 11, 2015 at 8:40 pm

    He’s going to be a private soon at that rate! Hopefully he won’t be quite so quick to cry ‘alien’ in future. Great story, Ali.


    • March 12, 2015 at 8:03 am

      Yes, he needs to shut up before he’s the oldest “new” recruit in the army!

      Liked by 1 person

  16. gentlestitches
    March 12, 2015 at 5:01 am

    Loved the way we saw what Major Nutjob saw. 😀


    • March 12, 2015 at 8:16 am

      Ha, yes, I didn’t think of that. Maybe he’s not so nutty after all, or…

      Liked by 1 person

  17. March 14, 2015 at 10:28 pm

    Yikers! Yeah false alarms to the president are a great way for a quick demotion. Too funny! I loved this.


    • March 15, 2015 at 8:48 am

      He’s lucky he’s only down to sergeant and not “latrine-cleaner” 🙂
      Glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

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