Extinction
It’s Friday Fictioneers time again, a weekly flash fiction challenge with a photo this week contributed by Marie Gail Stratford. As always, our 100 word fiction is overseen by Rochelle.
This week I drew inspiration from the rather witty words printed on the chopstick wrapper. To be honest, I have no idea what I’ve written, what genre it is or if it even makes much sense! Is it a damning indictment of Mankind? Maybe. Or maybe it’s a quirky story about cutlery. Quite how I got this out of a picture of a Chinese takeaway I don’t know.
To see this week’s other stories, click on the little blue fellow below.
A cleverly-aimed chopstick could take out an eye – the Chopstick People had decimated the Spoon People – but an expertly-wielded fork could disembowel. The Fork People easily subdued those of the Chopstick.
Before long the Fork People fell to followers of the Knife, who fell in their turn. Progress, proliferation. Power was everything, desired, required.
At last came People wielding such utensils as had never before been seen. They used them on the Spoon People, the Chopstick, the Fork and the Knife. Finally, when all other People were destroyed, they used them on each other.
For such is the way of People.
The cutlery wars. I side with spoons. Because I like the shape.
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Nicely smooth and rounded. No sharp edges. And often full of ice cream!
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Orwell with Sriracha on the side?
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Could well be.
I Googled “Sriracha” and that sounds like the sort of thing I’d squirt on everything. Apparently you can get it over here, yay! Goodbye stomach lining 🙂
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Yes, Matthew discovered it over the winter. It apparently goes on everything. Enjoy!
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Brilliant! Love it!
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Yay, I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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A wonderful mixture of commentary and your unique sense of humor.
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Thanks, I like that description.
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Knives might do more damage but if you want to extend the pain, go with a spoon 🙂 A dull one LOL
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True, very “Robin Hood Prince of Thieves” of you 🙂
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Cutlery wars- Revenge of of the Chopsticks lol 🙂 Good job.
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Thanks!
Next episode – The Fish Slices Strike Back 🙂
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Great story! And sadly the ending is too true…
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Thanks. And yes, sadly we see this all the time.
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Oh 😛 Yes! Those darned Fork People started the entire mess…just as I’ve suspected all these years!
This was a great piece, doc…and not too heavy moral handed.
Ellespeth
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Never trust the Fork People.
I was only partly on my soap box 🙂 I’m glad you enjoyed it!
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This made me burst out laughing! How DID you manage to be both funny AND philosophical? (Something in it reminded me of the extinction of the Cat People’s race in Red Dwarf — have you seen the series?)
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I think a good way to get messages across is to sneak them in under the guise of humour 🙂
Yay, “Boys from the Dwarf” (wave hands in front of body)! I’ve seen Red Dwarf (at least the first 6 series) so many times I can practically quote entire scripts. Nice to meet a fellow fan!
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Bill uses Sriracha on all sorts of things and homed in on that immediately. 🙂
janet
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I’d never heard of it until NAPR commented but it sounds like something I need to get better acquainted with 🙂
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It’s the Spork People who will prevail!
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I did wonder if I could get Sporks in there too as some sort of mixed race cutlery, but sadly only 100 words 😦 That’s a moral for another day!
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The Sporks will not be alone…the Splayds will join them in victory!
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That sounds cool! Now I’m trying to imagine what a splayd would look like 🙂
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Loved the tone of this.
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Thanks, I’m glad it worked!
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Ali, This was a bit crazy but fun. A video of this could be shown along with Cows With Guns, a violent cartoon double feature. It might even become a cult favorite. Well written with kind of darkish/utensilish humor. 🙂 —Susan
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Thanks!
That sounds cool – working title “Sporks with Uzis” 🙂
I’m glad you enjoyed it.
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Dear Draliman,
You nailed the characteristic of People. Say….the Nailers…
Good job.
Aloha,
Doug
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Dear Doug,
Thanks! Maybe the Nailers are the ones looking down sadly and telling this story.
Ali
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This is so clever. I could really picture cutlery wars. Great job.
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Thanks! It’s carnage in the kitchen 🙂
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Bit like when I cook then!
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🙂
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Clever. I’m glad you took this path. No need to explain because it really worked. We have a tub of this hot sauce in our fridge – ready to fry taste buds at a moments notice.
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Thanks!
I’m going to have to find some of that sauce. I like it hot 🙂
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It makes a lot of sense. Horror would be the genre I suspect. The metaphor of man constanly trying to make better and better weapons until we finally destroy ourselves.
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Exactly, thanks! I guess the idea is pretty horrific so that seems the appropriate genre.
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I’m sticking with finger food, all of you sound blood thirsty. Cute story.
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Yeah, finger food dipped in that hot sauce, sounds good 🙂
Glad you liked it!
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Cutlery Wars – a reality show in the making. Loved it!
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“…meanwhile in the kitchen the forks and spoons are arguing about their latest challenge…” 🙂
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me likey
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I’m glad, thanks for reading 🙂
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After your intro, I think I’ll go with a damning indictment of mankind. This is so often how it turns out to be, unfortunately. A well written and beautifully imagined version of the cutlery wars.
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It is indeed a damning indictment of mankind, but told in a quirky manner. As you say we’ve seen this happen, though not to total extinction (yet).
Thank you so much for your kind comments.
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loved this. how you delivered the message, that was so clever 🙂 my fave piece this week 🙂
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Thank you, that’s so lovely of you to say! I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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Dear Ali,
I think I’d call this allegory. You nailed human nature. I raise my chopsticks to you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
Thank you, for the chopstick raising and the genre specification!
Ali
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I may have written this before, too bad, you get to read it again.
I like your weird humor. Great job. ;0)
Phyllis
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Thanks! You can tell me you like my weird humour as many times as you like, it’s nice to hear 🙂
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Wow! Thanks. ;0)
And I’ll mean it every time.
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🙂
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Dear Draliman, Your story is brilliant and funny! I love the cutlery wars! You are a GENIUS! Nan 🙂
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I’m glad you liked it! It was the phrase “fork people” and the superior attitude of the chopsticks that gave me the idea 🙂
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