Archive

Posts Tagged ‘Friday Fictioneers’

FF – The Aspiring Musician

March 13, 2019 107 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Anshu Bhojnagarwala.

Another story which came straight into my head. Yay!

 

“What the hell is that?”

“I got it from the dump. Pretty great, huh?”

“It’s got a tree growing out of it.”

“You’ve heard of house music? Garage?”

“Yessss….”

“This is gonna be ‘Plant’.”

“Jesus.”

“Here goes…”

Thunk! Crash!

A cat’s tail, poking out from beneath the rubble, twitched once and was still.

“YOU KILLED MR FLUFFY, YOU MURDERER!”

“Maybe it was a bit knackered. I saw a guitar with mushrooms growing out of it down the dump… ‘Fungus’! Awesome!”

Meanwhile Mr Fluffy, one of his nine lives sadly gone, extricated himself and trotted away in search of a less insane human.

 

FF – Don’t be a Jeff!

March 6, 2019 76 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by C.E. Ayr.

Copyright C.E. Ayr

 

Jeff bid goodbye to his mates and left the pub. The other members of the motorcycle gang left en masse but Jeff slunk around the corner to his piddly little moped. As his fellows roared off on their testosterone-fuelled hogs, Jeff opened his throttle and charged off at his top speed of 17mph, head down.

But – too late! He had been spotted! The video was online! Jeff’s street cred was ruined!

 

Don’t let this happen to you. Visit Mike’s Bikes today! Get yourself a Harley!

 

10% discount for members of the Death’s Head Slasher Biker Gang

Don’t be a Jeff!

 

FF – Ye Tragedy at Red Mountain

February 27, 2019 66 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Jean L. Hays.

Here’s the link for all the stories. I don’t know how to make the big blue froggy work 😦

I was in a weird mood when I wrote this and I had a headache. So here’s a weird story which will give you a headache.

Copyright Jean L. Hays

 

Ye Tragedy at Red Mountain

And so did it come to pass that the killer slugs reached Red Mountain, and thus did the townsfolk shelter in ye Deli, for its shelves were filled to bursting with salt.

And the townsfolk did surround ye bastion with salt, and the slugs did dissolve, and the townsfolk did rejoice, and did not escape as they were urged!

As the salt did deplete, removed they their eye-glasses to construct a giant magnifier. And brave Sebastian did climb the roof with the glass to fry the slugs.

And then did the sun go in and the townsfolk did die.

Idiots.

The End.

 

FF – The Glass World

February 20, 2019 84 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. She also contributed the photo this week.

I was worried this week as I’m out at the cinema later and will have no time to think of a story, but I had an idea the instant I saw the photo and the story was finished ten minutes later. I love it when a plan comes together 🙂

 

He looked sadly, resigned, at the flowers. Once so vibrant, they had taken on a different kind of beauty. Harsh, rigid, eternal.

Already he could feel the bioweapon coursing through his veins. His legs hung heavy from the edge of the chair, opalescent, a multi-coloured perfection no glass-blower could hope to replicate.

His mistake, of course, had been to add the pathogen to the water supply, free to infect every living thing, a misguided protest at the folly of Man now become Mankind’s end.

On reflection, testing the antidote before releasing the virus would have been a good idea, too.

 

FF – Hors d’oeuvres

February 13, 2019 69 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by J Hardy Carroll.

I had no time today to even think of a story and was beginning to panic, but fortunately this occurred to me on the way home, thinking of that strange thing at the upstairs window…

Copyright J Hardy Carroll

 

“A beautiful location, miles from anywhere.”

“It is beautiful!”

“Notice the brickwork, the original windows…”

“Oh my, yes! And what’s that up there, it looks like OH MY GOD IT’S A SEVERED HEAD!”

“No, no, of course it’s not…”

“SEVERED HEAD! SEVERED HEAD!”

“I’m sure it’s just left over from Halloween.”

“SEVERED… do you really think so?”

“Realistic but clearly fake.”

“Oh, I feel so silly!”

“Nonsense, not at all. Listen, the owners are friends of mine. I’m sure they’d love to… have you for dinner.”

“Oh, lovely! Will there be hors d’oeuvre?”

“Lady, you are the… um, yes.”

“Lovely!”

 

FF – Out of the Fire

February 6, 2019 82 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Anshu Bhojnagarwala.

 

“We call in humility.”

“And the Dark Lord shall answer!”

“We ask for his presence.”

“And the Dark Lord shall come!”

“To step out of the flames.”

“And the Dark Lord shall appear!”

“Arise! Arise! Arise!”

Phaaa-boooom!

“I AM COME!”

“Oh, Lord of Darkness, hear these pleas of your humble slaves…”

“YES, MORTALS, I AM HERE TO DESTROY AND MAIM AND…”

Michael? What are you and your friends doing down there?

“Arse, it’s my Mum.”

If you’ve lit another fire, so help me I’ll tan your hides…

“RIGHT, I’M OFF. I DON’T DO MUMS, MUMS ARE SCARY.”

Phaaa-boooom!

“Bugger.”

 

FF – Dude

January 30, 2019 87 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. The photo was contributed by Renee Heath.

My story hasn’t really got a beginning, middle or end and isn’t really a story as such either, but I’m short on ideas and time 😦

Copyright Renee Heath

 

“Dude.”

“Dude.”

Puff puff

“This is some good shit.”

“Yeah.”

“Let’s sit here some more and watch our tent. It’s, like, swayin’ an’ driftin’.”

“Dude. It’s multicoloured. What is this stuff?”

“Peyote. All natural.”

Natural? Gotta be good for you then.”

“Dude.”

“Storm coming up. Should we move?”

Can’t move, dude.”

“Man, this wind is bad. Where’d the tent go?”

“Blew away, dude.”

“Dude. SAVE THE WEED!”

Scramble scramble

“Weed is saved!”

“Dude!”

“Dude!”

“Car’s blown over.”

“Don’t care.”

“We’re gonna regret this tomorrow.”

“Live in the now, dude! What d’ya do?”

“Brain surgeon. You?”

“Airline pilot.”

“Dude.”

“Dude.”