Archive

Posts Tagged ‘Friday Fictioneers’

FF – Out of Date

August 21, 2019 61 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Dale Rogerson.

I’m in a weird mood today so here’s a weird story. Click on the froggy to read all the other contributions.

Copyright Dale Rogerson

 

It appears to be a restaurant like any other…

“Superb meal, what-ho?”

“Top hole, don’t’cha know!”

“Ye-dishk’na ga… ulp, I meant, lovely…”

A diner stands and eviscerates the unfortunate. Yellow blood spurts…

… for this “restaurant” lies on a distant planet, a training ground for the infiltration of Earth. A century in preparation. Mistakes will not be tolerated!

They rise, adjust their cravats, top hats and monocles… they appear to be a century out of date! After all that preparation…

When they get to Earth they’ll look like a right load of dozy pillocks.

What a complete bollocks-up.

Invasion… cancelled.

 

A Bungled Camp-Out

August 14, 2019 55 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Jan Wayne Fields.

I don’t know if you remember my completely fictional characters Rocheel and Dail and their Disappointing Day Out? Well, they’re back and joined by the equally fictional “Jon”! This week they’ve decided to go camping in the back garden…

To read the other stories, click on the froggy.

Copyright Jan Wayne Fields

 

“Aargh! Dail! Help!”

“What are you doing, Rocheel? Is that you under the tent?”

“It fell on me.”

“The instructions clearly say ‘insert section iii of pole B into flange A of tent flap 3, while gently tugging guide rope 7c’.”

“CLEARLY?”

“Fair enough. So, the barbecue…. hmm, nothing’s happening, maybe a bit more lighter fluid…”

WHOOMP!

“Aargh, my eyebrows, my eyebrows are gone, gone forever!”

“Well, Dail, who are we gong to blame for this debacle?”

As one, they turned to look toward the house…

“Good idea. Jon, oh Jon, could you come out here a moment please…?”

 

 

FF – False Assumption

August 7, 2019 68 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Randy Mazie.

This is a photo from December 2013 and I actually remembered it! I was going to just repost that story, but I wrote a new one so here’s a link to the old one instead. As a sort of drali-bonus. You’re welcome.

For all the stories, click on the froggy.

trespass_randy_mazie-1

Copyright Randy Mazie

 

“No, we shouldn’t go in there!” Jeff was adamant.

“Ha, come on. ‘NO TRESSRASSING’? What does that even mean?!”

“It’s obvious. Come on, let’s go.”

“Chicken!” laughed Mike, already working at the boards on one of the windows. It creaked and splintered. “Last one in’s a rotten egg!”

Jeff peered through the window as Mike cavorted around the abandoned building.

“NO TRESPASSING!” boomed a voice. An axe swung. At first Jeff thought it had missed, then, almost in slow-motion, Mike’s head rolled from his body.

Jeff ran.

Just because you can’t spell, doesn’t mean you’re not a psychotic axe-wielding maniac.

 

FF – Looking the Other Way

July 31, 2019 66 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Ted Strutz.

For the other stories, click on the little stylised froggy.

Copyright Ted Strutz

 

“Did it go okay?”

“What?”

“The bomb. Planting the bomb in the seaplane.”

“What? This bomb?”

“I told you. To plant the bomb. In the PLANE!”

“Oops.”

“So. The Jackal’s drug shipment gets away from us again. Get out of my sight, you MORON!”

Agent Johnson walked away, full of insincere apologies. He disliked playing the incompetent fool, but he lived in a huge house, his kids were in expensive schools, his wife dripped diamonds.

The Jackal was very generous to those willing to go that extra mile. This should be worth at least a new swimming pool…

 

FF – Think it Through

July 24, 2019 68 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Sandra Crook.

Click on the froggy for all the stories.

Copyright Sandra Crook

 

“It’ll be amazing, my love! We shall live as in Steam Age times! We shall eschew modern technology and replicate a simpler time!”

… Christ… “I don’t know. I rather like my home digital assistant…” … last week it was ‘open a meditation retreat’…

“Steam trains, washing in the stream, clean air, making our own entertainment…”

The train went past. They began to hack and cough, smoke filling their lungs.

“As I was saying, my love… dirty transport, bubonic plague, no antibiotics, filthy smoky air, boring evenings with no Netflix… we should respect the status quo…”

“I think that would be best, dear.” … idiot…

 

FF – See No Evil

July 17, 2019 57 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Roger Bultot.

For the other stories, click on the froggy!


I’m off to the cinema this evening to see Spiderman, hence the early posting of my story. I thought I’d use some of my lunch break to write this, rather than rush this evening 🙂

Copyright Roger Bultot

 

See no evil.

That was the central tenet. Nobody wanted to know. Nobody cared. It was the law. THEY enforced it.

When Samuel saw thugs beating up a boy, he couldn’t look the other way.

He knew it was wrong. He knew he shouldn’t. But he did it anyway. He shouted at them.

They abandoned their attack and fled.

Maybe he would be lucky? Maybe THEY hadn’t noticed?

A creaking disabused him. The hands on the Watcher opened. It looked at him.

He headed home. Maybe he would have time to say goodbye to his wife before THEY came for him.

 

FF – Where are they Now Part 1 – Jack

July 10, 2019 63 comments

Here is my post for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Dale Rogerson.

Well, I only remembered about this a little wee while ago as I was very busy at work. Now I’m out babysitting!

To read the other stories and add your own, click the froggy.

Copyright Dale Rogerson

 

Jack, of beanstalk fame, was living the high life. A giant here, an ogre there. Easy. It went to his head. It made him careless.

“Wow! Look at that great artwork!”

He admired the sculpture. He took pictures. He didn’t pay attention.

Fee fi fo fum, I smell a charging point, here I come! Fo fum fi fee, a quick bit of charge and then I’m free!

The giant’s giant electric car, silent in its approach, squished Jack into the pavement. The giant plugged in, absent-mindedly wiping some of Jack off his shoe.

From mighty giant killer to pavement art. Poor Jack 😦