On a Promise
It’s Friday Fictioneers time here on the interwebz. This is a 100 word photo challenge, and this week said photo has been supplied by our lovely and talented host, Rochelle!
If you would like to take part, head over here, check out the instructions and then leave a link to your story via the little blue froggie fellow (where you can also find all this week’s other contributions).
I didn’t see “death” in this week’s photo, so I apologise to any of my regulars who are expecting horror, gore and whatnot.
Bored, Simeon placed his drink down and began drumming on the bar with two cocktail sticks, tapping his foot in time. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a raven-haired beauty gliding across the room towards him.
“Come with me,” she whispered. “We will make beautiful music together.”
In a daze, Simeon enjoyed the seductive sway of her hips as she led him from the bar.
Her apartment was filled with a flowing melody as her nimble fingers danced over the keys. As he tapped out the rhythm on a snare drum, Simeon reflected morosely that this wasn’t exactly what he’d had in mind.
Ah, he may be disappointed tonight, but if music is the way into her heart then he is well on his way to getting it. 🙂
(Unless her handegg-playing boyfriend barges in at some point later in the story.)
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Let’s hope he’s willing to play the long game!
He can always visit her while her handegg-playing boyfriend is out playing handegg 🙂
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Ha! Yeah, those raven-haired girls are usually up to no good in the end, so that may still happen.
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Beware of idioms because they will surely bite you on your butt 🙂
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She’s evidently a very literal-minded woman 🙂
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Not exactly the drum he had in mind of hitting, hmmm?
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A drum was certainly not what he was hoping to bang that evening, no 😉
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Well played.
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ha.. yes hopeful there might be a little serenade later on..
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He just needs to hang in there a little bit longer…
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Hah! I like how you led us, the readers, along the same path the raven-haired beauty led Simeon.
Claire
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It could have gone either way until the end. Glad you enjoyed it!
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I think I knew her once. My snare drum never satisfied her.
DJ
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That’s why I go straight for the bass 🙂
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Nice visuals. I could see what you wrote.
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Thanks, I tried to get the description flowing.
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You did a good job of showing not telling.
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Oh! this made me laugh – thanks.
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I’m glad I brought a smile to your face 🙂
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I think this may have been how the Eurythmics formed….
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I always wondered why David Stewart always looked a bit grumpy…
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Dear Draliman, I bet this isn’t what he thought was going to happen is right! So funny and quite good! Nan 😉
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Dear Nan, no, he had something quite different in mind! Maybe in time…
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it looks like our guy needs to learn some patience. 🙂
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Yes, he needs to look at the long game!
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That’ll teach him to drum on bars with cocktail sticks. Good story.
Marg
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He should have known he’d attract the music lovers 🙂
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Oh this is funny, doc! Hope he remembers that patience is a virtue!
This one wasn’t scary. Must have been the music room image…
Ellespeth
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I’m glad you liked it! I couldn’t think of anything scary in a music room.
I’m sure he’ll stick around for a bit to see what might happen.
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That really made me laugh. I can just imagine his disappointment.
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At least he didn’t just storm out!
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Haha! Good one!
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Poor chap 🙂
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Well, he’s in her apartment, so one never knows what will happen after the jam session. 😉
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Exactly, he’s got his fingers crossed I think!
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Well phoo, I really wanted more. What a teaser. That was not kind of you.
Off to my bookshelf.
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I always like to leave the audience wanting more 🙂
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And then…she murdered him with an ax! Oh, just kidding. Well maybe she’s just warming up. Great, and unexpected, story, Alistair.
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He’s either going to get lucky or get dead 🙂
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Happy, Happy Birthday Dr. Ali!
Have a marvelous Birthday weekend.
Eat cake and let your fans see a photo.
Thank you for sharing your life and stories with me.
It’s been my pleasure.
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Thanks! I had a lovely meal with the family and ate cake and ice cream 🙂
Thank you for all your comments, I always look forward to hearing from you.
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I was expecting her to be a succubus! I did laugh out loud at the ending though. Well done.
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Ooh, now there’s an idea. A bit like Bo in Lost Girl.
Glad you enjoyed it!
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I just started watching that. It looks good.
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I’ve seen the first 2 series, I just got the third for my birthday, yay! And better, they’ve announced the upcoming 5th series will be the last, which means they’ll finish it properly rather than have it cancelled on a cliffhanger.
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That sounds great. I’ve only seen a couple of shows, but I really like it. Happy Birthday! 🙂
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Thanks 🙂
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Dear Ali,
Well when she said, “Let’s make beautiful music…” he shouldn’t have fallen for that old line. 😉
I love the way things played out. Made me smile. Made me laugh. Loved it.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
I’m glad you liked it! There doesn’t always have to be death and destruction in my stories 🙂
Ali
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Made me chuckle as well, great job again 🙂
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Thanks, I’m glad you had a chuckle 🙂
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Haha…that’s what they get for being presumptuous!
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Indeed. Well, maybe if he hangs in there…
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Such a funny story, made me laugh. Poor Simon…
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Poor chap indeed 🙂 I’m glad you enjoyed it!
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I think Simeon dabbles too much in subtext. It was completely clear what she was after – good drummers are hard to find! 🙂
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It’s hard to keep a good rhythm and at last she’s found the perfect match!
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That made me laugh silently! I love the use of the word “morosely” at the end. Perfect for the scene.
Also, loved these two sets of lines:
‘“Come with me,” she whispered. “We will make beautiful music together.”
In a daze, Simeon enjoyed the seductive sway of her hips as she led him from the bar.’
The poor git!
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I’m glad you enjoyed it! Poor git indeed 🙂
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