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Diner of DOOM

It’s Friday Fictioneers time again, hosted by Rochelle, and this week the photo was contributed by Raina Ng. We get around 100 words to write about a picture, and you can read this week’s other stories by clicking on the blue froggy.

Be afraid. Be very afraid, as I present to you “The Diner of DOOM”.

kitche-picture-prompt

Copyright Raina Ng

 

Kat and Jed exchanged anxious glances as they hid behind the diner’s counter. Outside the noise was getting worse – banging on the door and windows, groaning, breaking glass.

“They’re still out there. What are we going to do?” asked Kat, trembling.

“What can we do? Call someone? Who’s going to come? We’re on our own.”

“Barricade the doors,” said Kat. “If they get in here… it’ll be carnage.”

“We could distract them. Throw them some burgers.”

“Urgh! The thought of watching them mindlessly rip into the meat…” shuddered Kat. “Animals!”

“Well,” said Jed, “it was your idea to do a Student Happy Hour.”

 

  1. June 10, 2015 at 6:49 pm

    That’s great. Really tense and then I laughed out loud!

    Like

    • June 10, 2015 at 7:05 pm

      Mission accomplished, then 🙂 Glad you liked it!

      Like

  2. June 10, 2015 at 6:50 pm

    Hahaha! The end surprised me, and made me laugh! 😀

    Like

    • June 10, 2015 at 7:07 pm

      That’s what I was aiming for, I’m glad I made you laugh 🙂

      Like

  3. June 10, 2015 at 6:53 pm

    LOL. It turned from a horror story to a funny one. Good one.

    Like

    • June 10, 2015 at 7:07 pm

      Thanks, with only 50 more words I could really have amped up the tension!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. June 10, 2015 at 6:57 pm

    We had a diner like that near college. I tremble with the memories … but man oh man, did they make a GREAT burger. Greasy, with fried onions, served up with chips on a hot platter. Ah, those were the days.

    Like

    • June 10, 2015 at 7:08 pm

      That sounds like a student’s dream! My mouth’s watering just at the thought.

      Like

  5. June 10, 2015 at 7:28 pm

    I was fully into a “Walking Dead” episode until the last few lines there. Nice!

    Like

    • June 10, 2015 at 7:52 pm

      Thanks, exactly what I was going for!

      Like

  6. June 10, 2015 at 7:33 pm

    Ha. I thought this was a zombie tale. No, it’s college students. Almost the same.

    Like

    • June 10, 2015 at 8:00 pm

      Ha, you’re not wrong 🙂 Though obviously when I was a student all students were hard working, conscientious and cool.

      Like

  7. June 10, 2015 at 9:51 pm

    Ha! Lovely one. Worse than zombies!

    Like

  8. June 10, 2015 at 10:26 pm

    oh, what a wonderful turn at the end. Ready for monsters . . . Well, I guess we still got them.

    Like

    • June 11, 2015 at 7:14 am

      We did for sure. I can imagine them hoping it’s zombies rather than students 🙂

      Like

  9. June 10, 2015 at 10:46 pm

    Didn’t expect that! Thanks for the chuckle. Good response to the prompt.

    Like

    • June 11, 2015 at 7:14 am

      I’m glad you liked my little twist!

      Like

  10. June 10, 2015 at 11:33 pm

    Oh, you. Nice twist. 🙂

    Like

  11. Francesca Smith
    June 10, 2015 at 11:40 pm

    And there I was preparing myself for something horrific…then again, Students/ rampaging…almost the same thing!
    Great and funny story!

    Like

    • June 11, 2015 at 7:17 am

      Zombies. Students. Same result 🙂
      I’m glad you enjoyed it!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. June 11, 2015 at 12:27 am

    LOL! Good one!

    Like

  13. June 11, 2015 at 2:49 am

    If there’s a happy hour, the students will come! Any excuse for a happy hour. Good one! I’m dying. I can’t think of anything at the moment.

    Like

    • June 11, 2015 at 7:19 am

      “Happy Hour” is like “Holy Grail” for students. It certainly was when I was one!
      I’m sure something will come to you 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  14. June 11, 2015 at 3:00 am

    I remember the ferocity in which my sons football team tore into their meals. I’d get put of the way!

    Like

    • June 11, 2015 at 7:20 am

      It’s best not to get between students and college athletes and their food. Especially if it’s “all you can eat” 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  15. June 11, 2015 at 3:01 am

    it was an ending i didn’t expect from you. i expected the worst. 🙂

    Like

  16. Lata Sunil
    June 11, 2015 at 3:06 am

    Hahaha.. i was thinking of something ominous. BuT this ending is genius.

    Like

    • June 11, 2015 at 7:21 am

      I’m glad you liked the ending, I’m in “comedy mode” at the moment 🙂

      Like

  17. June 11, 2015 at 4:18 am

    Reminds me of the time I took charge of the first graders as prefect 😀 Didn’t turn out so well. Genius ending indeed.

    Like

    • June 11, 2015 at 7:22 am

      That sounds like a recipe for mayhem and anarchy! I’m glad you liked my story 🙂

      Like

  18. June 11, 2015 at 9:37 am

    Nicely defused at the end there. 🙂

    Like

    • June 12, 2015 at 8:12 am

      Thanks, I like building tension and then twisting it at the end 🙂

      Like

  19. June 11, 2015 at 1:57 pm

    Excellent surprise twist, and oh so true! For a good burger … I’ll bet everyone has at least one memory of the perfect bite! 🙂 Thanks for visiting my blog, I’ll have to consider this flash fiction challenge too. Such fun!

    Like

    • June 11, 2015 at 8:13 pm

      Just wanted you to know, I dipped my toe in the pool and then jumped right in! 🙂 Gave you all the blame, I mean credit!

      Like

      • June 12, 2015 at 8:53 am

        I just read it – very good! And thanks for the “credit” 🙂

        Like

    • June 12, 2015 at 8:49 am

      The perfect bite – like “The Perfect Storm” except with more tasty goodness 🙂

      Like

  20. June 11, 2015 at 3:46 pm

    Very good. I was laughing at the title and then thought are you serious this week? But no.

    Like

  21. June 11, 2015 at 5:04 pm

    I loved the last line! I was not expecting it to be students… Good story Ali! ^..^

    Like

  22. June 11, 2015 at 7:01 pm

    Students!?!? Do they even have any money? What was Kat thinking?

    Like

    • June 12, 2015 at 8:50 am

      I don’t think she was thinking, ES 😦

      Like

  23. June 11, 2015 at 8:28 pm

    Great story! You set us up with your title and lead in to the story. But students can be pretty scary, too! (I used to be a college professor, so I know!) 😉

    Like

  24. June 12, 2015 at 4:08 am

    HahHah! Good one!

    Like

  25. June 12, 2015 at 5:47 am

    Beautifully Written

    Like

  26. June 12, 2015 at 12:48 pm

    I laughed at the end. I’ve been to Student Happy Hours and that is an apt description. Hope the hamburger was cooked! Don’t want to get sued for creating bad stomachs, too.
    Great story and fun read.

    Like

    • June 12, 2015 at 3:18 pm

      I always put a “bad stomach” down to the ten pints of beer when I was a student. Maybe it was the food all along 🙂

      Like

      • June 12, 2015 at 5:06 pm

        Yes, it’s always the food.
        Beer is a whole food group on to itself.
        Wow, 10 pints. You would loose me at 8!

        Like

      • June 12, 2015 at 7:26 pm

        That was a long time ago…

        Like

  27. June 12, 2015 at 1:43 pm

    Hilarious! The best twist ending I’ve read in a long time. Nicely done, Alistair!!!

    Like

    • June 12, 2015 at 3:18 pm

      I’m glad you liked my little twist 🙂

      Like

  28. June 12, 2015 at 3:20 pm

    Loved it….very funny!

    Like

  29. June 12, 2015 at 4:47 pm

    Students in their feelings of ecstasy are difficult to control 🙂

    Like

    • June 12, 2015 at 7:25 pm

      If not impossible. In fact, best just to get out of their way 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  30. June 13, 2015 at 5:23 am

    Shades of Animal House. That was hilarious. Those kids would frighten zombies away. I loved that twist at the end, Ali. Seems fun-loving students are more dangerous in a pack. 😀 — Suzanne

    Like

    • June 13, 2015 at 9:25 am

      Definitely more dangerous in a pack, and more scary too. Give me zombies any day! I’m glad you liked it 🙂

      Like

  31. June 13, 2015 at 8:09 am

    You always surpise us, with your stories, Draliman. We were awaiting the outcome with tension and laugh it off at the end 😀 Pawkisses for a Happy Weekend 🙂 ❤

    Like

    • June 13, 2015 at 9:26 am

      I’m glad you liked the twist at the end of my story! You have a good weekend too 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  32. June 13, 2015 at 9:23 pm

    Great twist! I was really expecting zombies. 🙂

    Like

  33. June 13, 2015 at 11:03 pm

    This is very funny.

    Like

  34. June 14, 2015 at 5:09 pm

    Hahaha! I loved it! Totally not what I expected, which made the punchline even better.

    Like

    • June 14, 2015 at 5:12 pm

      I was hoping people would leap to straight to “zombies” 🙂

      Like

      • June 17, 2015 at 1:52 pm

        I certainly did. Mission accomplished!

        Like

  35. June 14, 2015 at 6:52 pm

    This make me shudder.. actually worse than I anticipated.. I thought it would be something benign like a zombie feeding frenzy.. but students..

    Like

    • June 15, 2015 at 11:38 am

      Give me some nice predictable zombies any day.

      Like

  36. June 14, 2015 at 7:17 pm

    Dear Draliman, Cute and funny story – I coughed on my coffee when I read the last sentence – you are so clever! Just great! Nan

    Like

    • June 15, 2015 at 11:38 am

      I’m glad you liked it! Sorry about the coffee 🙂

      Like

  37. June 14, 2015 at 8:31 pm

    What can I say that others haven’t already? So, I just say ‘oh no!” and then “hahaha!”
    Ellespeth

    Like

    • June 15, 2015 at 11:39 am

      Glad you liked it!
      I’m not sure students are preferable to zombies, though 🙂

      Like

  38. June 14, 2015 at 8:51 pm

    Dear Ali,

    You made me laugh out loud. Thank you, I needed that. 😀

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

    • June 15, 2015 at 11:43 am

      Dear Rochelle,
      I’m glad I made you laugh! I think I remember you commenting on someone else’s contribution once that you’re not into zombie stories (if I’m remembering correctly), so I did wonder what you’d be thinking of this until you reached the end 🙂
      Ali

      Like

      • June 15, 2015 at 11:45 am

        Honestly, zombies never entered my mind. And yes, you do remember correctly. Zombies and vampires leave me cold. 😉

        Shalom,

        Rochelle

        Like

  39. June 14, 2015 at 11:56 pm

    That was good. Very good.

    Like

  40. June 16, 2015 at 2:21 am

    hilarious. have you considered putting your little stories together into a book some time? people would pay for this stuff you know..

    Like

    • June 16, 2015 at 12:07 pm

      I do think about it from time to time. Just choose stories which don’t rely on the photos (or take some similar ones myself). One day…
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

      • June 16, 2015 at 12:19 pm

        Even if you were inspired by the photos, the stories are still yours- you should do it! 🙂

        Like

  41. June 16, 2015 at 4:39 pm

    She showed such innocence to such a hard truth!

    Like

    • June 16, 2015 at 6:55 pm

      She certainly should have known better!

      Like

  1. June 11, 2015 at 3:32 am

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