Home > Fiction > FF – Into the Fire

FF – Into the Fire

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. It’s a brand new photo this week, supplied by Vijaya Sundaram.

To read the other stories, click on the blue froggy.


Copyright Vijaya Sundaram

Copyright Vijaya Sundaram

 

Jorgen watched the fireworks as they burst in triumphant splendour over the distant town.

His town.

His burning town.

A town full of corpses. His family, his friends, men, women, children. The woman who helped his kids cross the street to school every day.

All gone now. All gone.

And the invaders were celebrating. Celebrating! Drinking their fill, gorging themselves while everything he’d ever known turned to ash.

Resolute, his decision made, he checked that the knife was secured to his belt and melted into the shadows, heading towards the smoke and fire.

 

  1. August 31, 2016 at 5:20 pm

    Oh, dear. Those are the kind of fireworks one doesn’t want to see!

    Like

    • August 31, 2016 at 6:07 pm

      For sure – celebrating the death of your town.

      Like

  2. August 31, 2016 at 5:53 pm

    A powerful story, brilliantly told. There is despair there, and a sense of resolution. I was caught up in it.

    Like

  3. August 31, 2016 at 6:53 pm

    Excellent tale. All too easy to imagine in today’s world. Great writing.

    Like

  4. August 31, 2016 at 8:15 pm

    You’ve captured the contrast between Jorgen’s tragic loss and the captors’ euphoric victory so well. I don’t blame him for wanting to take revenge.

    Like

  5. August 31, 2016 at 8:18 pm

    Paybacks!!!! I would not want to be in his way.

    DJ

    Like

    • September 1, 2016 at 7:50 am

      Nor me. I think there will be a few unexplained deaths this night.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. August 31, 2016 at 8:56 pm

    I hope Jorgen will emerge victorious!

    Like

    • September 1, 2016 at 7:51 am

      Me too. Those invaders sound like they deserve some payback.

      Like

  7. August 31, 2016 at 10:07 pm

    Definitely a prompting read that makes me want more. You may need to broaden this into a short story! 🙂

    Like

    • September 1, 2016 at 7:54 am

      There was definitely more I wanted to tell. I wanted him to have started a new life there after a career as a paid assassin (to make his revenge much more likely, and have him return to a life he’d hoped to leave behind) but sadly the word count defeated me 🙂
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

      • September 1, 2016 at 12:44 pm

        Time for a spin off short 😉 lol

        Like

  8. August 31, 2016 at 10:36 pm

    Defeat and victory, so close together. Sadness and tears, right beside laughter and celebrations. There are always two sides to a coin. 🙂

    Like

    • September 1, 2016 at 7:56 am

      There often are, especially when violence is involved. I’m glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

  9. August 31, 2016 at 11:39 pm

    And so begins the tale of war, magic, murder, and finally rebirth. I can see it all …

    Like

    • September 1, 2016 at 7:57 am

      A tale which has everything! He might even fall in love with a survivor…

      Like

  10. Lyn
    September 1, 2016 at 12:59 am

    I’m with Marilyn. Keep this going–there’s a great story to be told 🙂

    Like

  11. September 1, 2016 at 2:59 am

    Wahhh!!! I WANT MORE! Hee Hee. What happens next? ☺

    Like

    • September 1, 2016 at 7:58 am

      He trips on his way into town and breaks his neck :-). No, that’s not right. Revenge is his!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. September 1, 2016 at 5:50 am

    The invasion of Possum Town!

    Like

    • September 1, 2016 at 7:58 am

      My hero could be Buster!

      Like

      • September 1, 2016 at 9:43 am

        And the story of his revenge would probably perfectly fit the 100 word maximum…

        Like

  13. September 1, 2016 at 7:17 am

    ah! Victory of one and devastation of another!

    Like

  14. September 1, 2016 at 8:49 am

    This stands alone, Ali, but could be the beginning of a longer thriller story. Good writing. 🙂 — Suzanne

    Like

  15. michael1148humphris
    September 1, 2016 at 9:12 am

    A great read, it stands up well as 100 word flash story. Mike

    Like

  16. September 1, 2016 at 10:11 am

    I think he might have a tough fight if they can kill everyone. Nice story.

    Like

  17. September 1, 2016 at 2:14 pm

    They say, vengence is sweet! Great story, Ali!

    Like

    • September 5, 2016 at 10:43 am

      Thanks! Sorry for the late reply, your comment went into the spam filter for some reason 😦

      Like

      • September 5, 2016 at 12:57 pm

        I understand. Sometimes I find people’s comments in my spam file.

        Like

  18. September 1, 2016 at 2:16 pm

    Excellent story and writing. This screams for more.

    Like

    • September 2, 2016 at 7:16 am

      Thanks! It is a candidate for lengthening.

      Like

  19. September 1, 2016 at 3:03 pm

    I think he might be going out in style. It sounds like there are more of them.

    Like

  20. September 1, 2016 at 3:54 pm

    The two differing sides are portrayed really well.

    Like

  21. September 1, 2016 at 3:56 pm

    Everyone is thirsty for blood the offenders and the offended.

    Like

  22. September 1, 2016 at 5:03 pm

    Has that Rod Serling kind-of tone to it. He wrote other stories than just s-f or speculative fiction, of course. Made me wish for more story. You got it GOOD!

    Like

    • September 2, 2016 at 7:18 am

      Thanks, I’m glad you liked it! There was more I wanted to say so I might extend it.

      Like

      • September 2, 2016 at 5:54 pm

        Oh PLEASE do! It’s good, it really is.

        Like

      • September 3, 2016 at 8:04 am

        Thanks, I might just do it!

        Like

  23. September 1, 2016 at 9:35 pm

    Dear Ali,

    Frightening, where’s Bruce Willis when we need him? Well done.

    Shalom.

    Rochelle

    Like

    • September 2, 2016 at 7:19 am

      Dear Rochelle,
      Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it!
      Maybe we’ll throw in a bit of Chuck Norris as well just to make it really good 🙂
      Ali

      Like

  24. September 2, 2016 at 10:51 pm

    Well, I hope he’s got a lot of stamina and I hope he’s well rested …

    Like

    • September 3, 2016 at 8:06 am

      Me too, he has a lot of work to do.

      Like

  25. September 3, 2016 at 6:20 pm

    Oh, how dire. Great suspense and description. NIce job, Ali.

    Like

    • September 4, 2016 at 6:23 am

      Thanks, I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  26. September 3, 2016 at 8:48 pm

    Oh I think he will catch them being drunk… a second blood bath coming.

    Like

    • September 4, 2016 at 6:24 am

      Yeah, methinks they celebrated too soon and now they’re in no fit state to defend themselves.

      Like

  27. September 4, 2016 at 10:04 am

    A great story and very well told. It’s a situation that could happen at any time, anywhere, and undoubtedly has done many times in the past. The ending holds a particularly powerful punch.

    Like

    • September 4, 2016 at 5:17 pm

      Thanks. I can’t help feeling that somewhere right now this is playing out.

      Liked by 1 person

  28. September 4, 2016 at 10:31 pm

    You’ve aptly described a man with nothing to lose!

    Like

  29. September 5, 2016 at 8:20 am

    Gripping. You’ve painted a convincing portrait of Jorgen. It’s a realistic scenario, unfortunately.

    Like

    • September 5, 2016 at 10:40 am

      Thanks. Unfortunately you’re right, it is realistic.

      Like

  30. September 5, 2016 at 10:28 pm

    Reminds us of how easy it is to have ongoing conflict with both sides feeling passionate and justified, both sides potentially grieving, taking revenge, celebrating. Made me pause. Well told!

    Like

    • September 6, 2016 at 7:23 am

      Indeed, everyone always thinks they’re in the right. I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  31. September 6, 2016 at 2:06 pm

    Wonderfully done, Ali. His anger, despair and determination come through really clearly. Hopefully he’ll find some other survivors and not just throw his life away needlessly – I can see some sort of resistance forming…

    Like

    • September 6, 2016 at 3:13 pm

      He may be the inspiration for resistance but he’s a lone wolf at heart…
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

  32. October 2, 2016 at 11:36 pm

    Go and get’em, cowboy. The night is still young!

    Like

    • October 3, 2016 at 7:05 am

      Plenty of time fer some killin’.

      Like

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