Home > Fiction > FF – Mr Clumsy and the Second Apocalypse

FF – Mr Clumsy and the Second Apocalypse

Here is my little story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Sandra Crook.

My story this week once again includes “sound effects” (some imagination required)!

Copyright Sandra Crook

 

It’s Andy “Accident-Prone” Andrews’ first day at the Museum of Pre-Apocalypse Earth…

“Oops, I’m sure that wasn’t valuable… moving on, here we see the last surviving example of a ‘wooden’ table. One sec, someone’s left a bunch of crap on it…”

Sweep, crash, tinkle

“That’s better. This so-called ‘wood’ was very solid…”

Knock knock

“… and as I demonstrate with this flame thrower, completely resistant to…”

Whoomp!

“…oops, um, all part of the show, folks, um, over here we see the last surviving ‘atomic bomb’. As you can see if I hit it with this sledgehammer, it’s completely resistant to…”

WHOOOOOOOOMP!

 

  1. October 3, 2018 at 7:31 pm

    Even after the Apocalypse, we still haven’t learned…!

    Liked by 2 people

    • October 3, 2018 at 7:40 pm

      Nope. One would have hoped that the last surviving weapons of mass destruction would have been destroyed or at least better protected…

      Liked by 2 people

  2. October 3, 2018 at 7:41 pm

    He went out in a blaze of glory! 😀

    Like

  3. October 3, 2018 at 7:55 pm

    Oh dear! That idea didn’t end well at all!

    Like

  4. October 3, 2018 at 8:05 pm

    There’s something about the words flame thrower – something terrifying. Very amusing story, well told.

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 6:59 am

      I started with “lighter” but thought “flame thrower” was much funnier 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. October 3, 2018 at 8:29 pm

    So funny!

    Like

  6. October 3, 2018 at 10:43 pm

    Be careful who you hire! This brought a smile to a rather dreary afternoon. Thanks.

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 7:01 am

      Their interview process could have used some work. I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  7. October 4, 2018 at 1:00 am

    Ah! The proverbial “bull in a china shop.” If they still have lawyers in that age, his employers are going to get hit with an atomic-sized lawsuit.

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 7:05 am

      Unless his employers were on-site at the time. In which case they’re never going to have to worry about anything ever again…

      Like

  8. October 4, 2018 at 2:44 am

    I like that blaze of stupidity from the comment section –
    And the sound effects were fun

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 7:03 am

      “Sounds effects” are also a cunning way to avoid breaking the dialogue and use far fewer words 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • October 4, 2018 at 6:50 pm

        Oh that is good to know – and it also was fresh and different – so keep on with your creative self!

        Like

      • October 5, 2018 at 7:28 am

        I will 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • October 7, 2018 at 6:44 pm

        🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  9. October 4, 2018 at 5:38 am

    Ha ha ha. Reminds me of the time when I was demonstrating the ‘unbreakable’ transparent shelves of a new refrigerator model to a customer at an exhibition. We had been taught to take them out, and gently drop them to the ground(upside down) to show how strong the shelves were. I took one out, and smartly threw it down straight. It chipped off with a loud CRACK, and the customer squealed with delight and started clapping and shouting- It broke, it broke!

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 7:04 am

      Ha, I wish I’d been there, that sounds awesome (well, not for you) 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  10. October 4, 2018 at 7:51 am

    Andy’s going to be in REALLY BIG trouble once the fallout settles. How dare he sweep all those precious artifacts off the display table like that!

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 11:49 am

      Well, it saved them from the fire! Though not the nuclear explosion.

      Like

  11. October 4, 2018 at 9:40 am

    Explosive stuff!

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 11:50 am

      Sorry to turn your lovely photo into an apocalypse 🙂

      Like

  12. October 4, 2018 at 10:05 am

    Haha! I didn’t see that coming! Once again, awesome story.

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 11:50 am

      Thanks, I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  13. October 4, 2018 at 10:26 am

    And I thought I was clumsy… 🙂

    Like

  14. Abhijit Ray
    October 4, 2018 at 10:48 am

    Accident prone Andy is not suited for the job, is he? Anyway, he has cause a nuclear explosion of some sort.

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 11:52 am

      Definitely not the job for him! Or anybody any more.

      Like

  15. October 4, 2018 at 11:17 am

    Dear Ali,

    Looks like the last job Andy will ever have. 😉 Pow! Funny stuff. Bam!

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 11:53 am

      Dear Rochelle,
      Even if had survived I don’t think anyone else would take the chance. I’m glad you liked it!
      And now you’re doing some sound effects of your own – I look forward to seeing them in your stories 😉
      Ali

      Liked by 2 people

  16. October 4, 2018 at 12:45 pm

    Oh well at least Andy had a blast. Who would have thought that an ass could turn into a weapon of destruction.

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 12:48 pm

      Ha yes, he certainly went out with a bang!

      Like

  17. October 4, 2018 at 2:04 pm

    I hated to cackle at this one… guess we now know how Terra was destroyed….LOL! Love it!

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 3:51 pm

      Yep, Andy got to it! At least in your story they still have replicate samples to study. I’m glad you liked it 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  18. October 4, 2018 at 2:32 pm

    From the photoprompt to Armageddon in 100 words. Wow!

    Like

    • October 4, 2018 at 3:52 pm

      You can’t hang around when you’ve got a word count 🙂

      Like

  19. October 5, 2018 at 11:20 am

    Had me laughing out loud! Nice one!!

    Like

  20. October 5, 2018 at 2:52 pm

    You made me chuckle. I get the feeling he should have researched wooden tables before taking on the job! Very funny.

    Like

    • October 6, 2018 at 9:23 am

      He definitely didn’t do the “required reading” before taking the job 🙂
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  21. October 5, 2018 at 3:41 pm

    Too funny, Ali…
    Well then. So much for that. He took his clumsiness to last extreme.

    Like

  22. October 6, 2018 at 3:28 am

    if his boss has survived, he’ll be fired. that is, if both of them did. 🙂

    Like

  23. October 6, 2018 at 4:51 pm

    Oy. Hes an apocalypse all by himself 🙂

    Like

  24. October 6, 2018 at 7:02 pm

    Oh my goodness, keep that man away from anything flammable or explosive. Oops … too late. Hilarious story! 🙂

    Like

    • October 7, 2018 at 6:03 am

      There was probably a warning in his employee file but who reads those? 🙂
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  25. October 7, 2018 at 4:05 pm

    Seems like there is always a post apocalypse apocalypse…

    Like

    • October 7, 2018 at 5:01 pm

      We’d never stop at just the one, that would just be lazy.

      Like

  26. October 7, 2018 at 5:16 pm

    This must be the worst first day on the job anyone has ever had! At least there’s no need to fire him… he did that to himself. 😉

    Like

  27. October 7, 2018 at 5:40 pm

    How on earth did he even get the job in the first place? Clever stuff.

    Like

    • October 8, 2018 at 6:54 am

      The only thing he’s any good at is interviews 🙂
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  28. October 7, 2018 at 5:52 pm

    MOL…MOL 😀 Extra Pawkisses 🙂 ❤

    Like

  29. October 8, 2018 at 12:58 am

    All the predictions are wrong. The world will be destroyed by a klutz. Very cute.

    Like

    • October 8, 2018 at 6:57 am

      It’s always what you least expect 🙂
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Liked by 1 person

  30. October 8, 2018 at 12:52 pm

    This is the shortest version of the Apocalypse I have ever read.

    Like

    • October 8, 2018 at 6:51 pm

      It doesn’t take someone like Andy long before it all goes horribly wrong.

      Liked by 1 person

  31. October 8, 2018 at 5:29 pm

    LOL. OMG where did they find Andy? Accident prone doesn’t quite cut it. Great laughs this week 🙂

    Like

    • October 8, 2018 at 6:53 pm

      There’s an Andy in every firm. Hopefully most of them don’t have access to nuclear weapons 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  32. October 8, 2018 at 11:30 pm

    The absolute worse docent in museum history!
    He could have had his own show but that atomic bomb blunder blew his chances!

    Like

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