Home > Fiction > FF – Not So Modern Tech

FF – Not So Modern Tech

Here is my contribution for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Jeff Arnold.

Copyright Jeff Arnold

 

“Wow, amazing! Feel those keys! What is it?”

“Ahem. A typewriter, Sir.”

“I see, yes! It writes as you type. Ingenious! Magnificent! A work of art!”

“Would Sir wish to purchase?”

“Of course! How do you connect the WiFi?”

“WiFi, Sir? WIFI? It has no WiFi!”

“What, now? No WiFi? What a stinking pile of crap!”

“Your language, Sir, forces me to eject your presence. I shall take a Polaroid of your aspect for our ‘banned’ wall.”

Click! Bzzzz. Whirrr.

“Oh, wow! A photo came out, ready made! Magnificent! I want one! I assume it Bluetooths to my Instagram?”

“GET OUT!”

 

  1. March 25, 2020 at 8:34 pm

    But if you could design a typewriter and polaroid that did those connectivity things, you could be on to a winner – why has no one done it yet?!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. March 25, 2020 at 8:36 pm

    The ultimate selfie

    Like

  3. March 25, 2020 at 8:44 pm

    I love it. Those youngsters don’t know what they missed.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. March 25, 2020 at 9:03 pm

    Well he’s been told to log off 🙂 Nice one.

    Liked by 1 person

    • March 26, 2020 at 6:32 am

      Yes, he probably doesn’t understand the concept of “physically” leaving 🙂

      Like

  5. March 25, 2020 at 9:19 pm

    I laughed so much I had tears! 😀 I say! I hope Sir was thrown out on his WIFI-connected ear!

    Like

    • March 26, 2020 at 6:35 am

      I believe he was, the ever-so-proper shopkeeper appears to be about to lose his rag 🙂
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Liked by 2 people

  6. March 25, 2020 at 9:42 pm

    This fellow’s going to get himself banned from all the best tourist spots. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • March 26, 2020 at 6:36 am

      He’s living in his own high tech world, so maybe that’s for the best 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. March 25, 2020 at 9:54 pm

    “What we have here… is a failure to communicate.” — from Cool Hand Luke

    Liked by 1 person

  8. March 26, 2020 at 4:20 am

    Haha…that guy!

    Like

  9. March 26, 2020 at 7:40 am

    Technophobe meets luddite. Lovely thought!

    Like

    • March 26, 2020 at 4:18 pm

      It’s never gonna work out, they’re too different!

      Like

  10. March 26, 2020 at 12:14 pm

    Dear Ali,

    Ya gotta laugh and shake your head. I know I’m doing just that. He should check out the rotary telephones the next aisle over. 😉

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

    • March 26, 2020 at 4:20 pm

      Dear Rochelle,
      I’m sure he’ll be very keen until he discovers they have no virtual reality interface 🙂
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  11. March 26, 2020 at 12:44 pm

    This made me smile. A great take on the prompt.

    Like

  12. March 26, 2020 at 3:14 pm

    You mean they haven’t invented a smart typewriter yet? And we think we live in a technologically advanced society….

    Like

    • March 26, 2020 at 4:26 pm

      It’s really not good enough. I’ve always wanted a smart typewriter in my flying car…

      Like

  13. March 26, 2020 at 4:14 pm

    Wonderfully funny 🙂

    Like

    • March 28, 2020 at 11:36 am

      Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂

      Like

  14. March 26, 2020 at 6:17 pm

    what a rude salesman. i wonder if he makes any sale.

    Like

  15. March 26, 2020 at 9:01 pm

    I love this: “Your language, Sir, forces me to eject your presence. I shall take a Polaroid of your aspect for our ‘banned’ wall.”

    That’s like me having a conversation with my mom. “I can’t go to your house. There’s no wifi.”

    Like

    • March 27, 2020 at 4:43 pm

      I did like that sentence, I can imagine the chap saying it!
      No WiFi? That’s no good at all.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. March 26, 2020 at 9:40 pm

    Oh, that was so funny! Loved it.

    Susan A Eames at
    Travel, Fiction and Photos

    Like

    • March 27, 2020 at 4:43 pm

      Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it!

      Like

  17. March 27, 2020 at 11:15 am

    Another hilarious comic piece, well done

    Like

  18. March 27, 2020 at 12:33 pm

    I could imagine a teenager asking questions like that! Nice one.

    Like

  19. March 27, 2020 at 4:46 pm

    Funny stuff, Ali, the generation gap is a rich source of entertaining conflict

    Like

  20. March 27, 2020 at 6:16 pm

    Haha! Love it! What next, a tape recorder?

    Like

    • March 28, 2020 at 11:42 am

      What temporary wonders would that hold, I wonder? 🙂

      Like

  21. March 27, 2020 at 10:16 pm

    Steampunk story. Love the retro humour!

    Like

  22. March 27, 2020 at 11:48 pm

    Awesome. lol

    Like

  23. March 28, 2020 at 12:27 am

    Some people has no respect for retroism…

    Like

  24. March 28, 2020 at 2:34 am

    Most kids don’t know how to dial a phone. The concept of a manual typewriter? A manual WHAT?

    Like

    • March 28, 2020 at 11:44 am

      That’s it, drag it all the way round, now wait… now the next number…

      Like

  25. March 28, 2020 at 2:43 am

    very creative and funny piece.
    I assume you got your inspiration from sci-fi. I mean wi-fi, I mean high-five,
    well, you know what I mean, I guess.

    Randy

    Like

    • March 28, 2020 at 11:44 am

      It was a sci-fi-wi-fi-high-five extravaganza!

      Like

  26. March 28, 2020 at 3:56 am

    Haha the clash between eras…

    Like

  27. March 28, 2020 at 7:59 am

    Too funny. Needed a laugh. 🙂

    Like

  28. March 28, 2020 at 4:40 pm

    MOL…those were the days huh…😸Clean Pawkisses for a Happy Caturday. Stay Safe Healthy and Yourselfie🐾😽💞

    Like

  29. Mike
    March 28, 2020 at 5:58 pm

    Loved this, the last three lines made it

    Like

    • March 29, 2020 at 3:53 pm

      Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it, especially the ending!

      Like

  30. March 28, 2020 at 7:27 pm

    Very witty Ali, I liked your story, especially the formal tone of the shop assistant, somehow part of the Old World Charm of the typewriter. I have tried explaining old fashioned rotary dial phones, fixed to the wall in the hallway for your calls to younger people. They look shocked !

    Like

    • March 29, 2020 at 3:59 pm

      I suppose it’s a bit like our shock when we here that people used to keep a pot under the bed for overnight wee-wees 🙂
      I’m glad you liked my story! The shopkeeper’s demeanour developed as I wrote and edited 🙂

      Like

  31. March 28, 2020 at 11:21 pm

    Har! Har! Imagine texting on one of those rotary dial phones…..Wait you mean I can’t text on them?

    Like

    • March 29, 2020 at 3:59 pm

      No, I’m afraid you can’t 🙂

      Like

  32. March 29, 2020 at 12:07 pm

    Ah, the foolish man no doubt his brain has bluetooth and his mind is controlled by the internet.

    Like

    • March 29, 2020 at 4:00 pm

      Cyborgs today, no manners, when I was young we had none of that…

      Liked by 1 person

  33. March 29, 2020 at 7:01 pm

    You need to call 911 on that rotary dial in the corner.

    Like

    • April 1, 2020 at 5:13 am

      Surely it’s voice activated… no?

      Like

  34. March 30, 2020 at 3:20 am

    I began typing on a typewriter much like this one. I had a camera that gave you pictures instantly as well. What grand memories. FYI: I still don;t know how to use a Bluetooth, nor Instagram?

    Like

    • April 1, 2020 at 5:17 am

      I used a typewriter once a long time ago, it’s quite difficult!

      Liked by 1 person

      • April 1, 2020 at 2:16 pm

        I thought the typewriter was easier than the keyboard. I loved the ratty-tat-tat sounds!

        Liked by 1 person

  35. March 30, 2020 at 6:20 pm

    “Your language, Sir, forces me to eject your presence.” I’d love to say that to someone one day! 😁

    Like

  36. March 31, 2020 at 2:22 am

    The new meets the old. That happens to me more and more. 😁 Interesting to see what’s next. I always tell my son, one day you’ll be just like me. Left behind!! Love the story, made me smile!

    Like

    • April 1, 2020 at 5:18 am

      Me too, I already don’t understand kids and their phones. I’ve been left behind 😦
      I’m glad you liked the story 🙂

      Like

  1. No trackbacks yet.

Speak to me - I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: