FF – Double Win!
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Ted Strutz.
For sale, one pre-fab house, £1000 ono complete with floor safe (broken)…
Three days earlier…
“Well, Baz? Did you get the safe?”
“It was bolted to the floor, boss.”
“Okay, so did you crack it in situ?”
“In where boss?”
“Did you open it and nick the contents?”
“Couldn’t boss. Too tough. So we brought it with us.”
“I thought you said it was bolted to the house?”
“Yeah. We brought the house too.”
“You what? Idiot!”
“What’ll we do boss?”
“Crack the safe and… stick the house on eBay. Double win! I take it all back. Nice job, Baz!”
“Thanks, boss!”
Categories: Fiction
flash fiction, Friday Fictioneers
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Friday Fictioneers
draliman on life 
A new meaning for the term “safehouse”. 😀
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Ha ha 🙂
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It’s going to be somewhat hard to hide the house while they fence it
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Looks to me like it already has a fence!
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Yeah, they can’t exactly stuff it under the bed if the police come a-knocking!
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Not the sharpest spoons in the box, are they?
What do you mean you don’t cut stuff with a spoon? You do if you’re Baz.
I liked your story, Ali!
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That Baz, he does his best, bless him 🙂
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Haha! Nice one, don’t fleece the house. Nick the whole thing, love it!!
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No point rushing when you can nick the whole thing and then go through it at your leisure later on!
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Quite right, may as well make it an enjoyable heist.
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I’m afraid there will be too many witnesses to that crime. 😉
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Yes, their stash is quite hard to hide!
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Surely someone spotted the missing building. I know the police are getting a bad press at the moment, but they can’t be that bad…!? 🙂
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Nah, sarge, there was always a gap there… 🙂
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You had me laughing from “in situ” to the very end 🙂
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I’m glad it made you laugh 🙂
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So… Wait… That house I bid on on eBay might not be legit?
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I couldn’t possibly comment. Though I can hear boss and Baz popping the Champagne next door…
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What a great story. Still smiling.
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I’m glad it made you smile 🙂
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Well, the Ebay ad be like “Half house, hole in floor for ventilation where safe was. Special price. Fire sale. No cops allowed.” 🙂
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Yes, that’s not suspicious at all 🙂
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Suspicious? Why?!! 😉
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Ali,
Funny!! This is a cautionary tale for buyers on e-bay, right?
∼🕊Dora
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If it looks too good to be true… 🙂
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They better hope the cops are really stupid.
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I doubt they’ve thought that far ahead 🙂
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LOL The title of the story says it all. That was an excellent take on the photo, Ali 😄
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I hear their next job will be to rob Fort Knox. They better buy a bigger truck…
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Some form of huge helicopter fleet and winch arrangement, perhaps…
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Oh dear. Who is going to buy a house with a cracked safe? I like the determination to please the boss. What was in the safe?
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I wouldn’t, very suspicious! We can only hope the safe’s contents were worth it.
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Great take on the photo.
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Thanks!
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Dear Ali,
There’s wins and then there’s Baz and his Boss. Fun stuff.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
They’re a law(less) unto themselves 🙂
Ali
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Awesome!! 👏
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Thanks, I’m glad you liked it 🙂
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i guess they’re too smart for their own good. 🙂
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Yes, they’re definitely the “smart” ones 🙂
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Great dialogue. I could picture the scene. I don’t suppose Baz and the Boss are too bright, but most criminals aren’t. Hilarious story, Ali!
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They’re a little below the average crim’s IQ 🙂
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Too funny. I bet someone wants to buy it. Hopefully for Baz before the police see it.
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I’m sure they can hide it by chucking some bushes over it 😉
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Farcically funny, love it, Ali!
My story!
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Thanks! It could maybe be in black and white with stirring backing music!
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Enterprising criminals. I see new unlawful capers on the way.
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I’m not sure how they can top stealing a house, but I bet they’ll give it a go!
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Now that is what I call creative storytelling.
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Heh 🙂
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Ingenious story Ali, I enjoyed it.
If E-bay can sells cars, sure they can sell houses !
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I don’t see why not. Knocked off houses 🙂
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“House for sale”…on eBay…really….MOL😸Pawkisses for a Happy Weekend🐾😽💞
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You can buy anything on there 🙂
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If only all criminals were so easy to catch!
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Not every criminal is a Baz!
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