draliman on life

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

What news event do you vividly remember hearing about as a child, and where were you?
The thing about being a kid is that I wasn’t very interested in news. I was more interested in cartoons. However, one event I remember was the first ever shuttle launch. It was delayed a few times, but we were called into one of the classrooms each time (the one with the TV!) to watch until it took off. That was April 1981, so I was in my final year of junior school.

What is a Christmas song that makes you cringe?
I was struggling to think of one and then another blogger reminded me – “Last Christmas”, By Wham!. Why does it make me cringe? Because it’s an absolute pile of steaming shit, that’s why.

What is one place you shop(ped prior to Covid) that might have surprised people?
Absolutely nowhere, I would say. My shopping is limited to a very few fairly mainstream outlets, mostly online. Even more online currently.

What is your least favourite holiday side dish?
I’ll eat anything and everything, me. Bring it on 🙂

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

Do you enjoy skiing or ice skating or if it’s warm where you are, hiking or enjoying outdoor sports?
I’ve never been skiing or ice skating. I’m sure I’d end up with a number of broken bones, and as a kid there was nowhere to do either without taking a holiday anyway. Nowadays, there’s a skating rink created over Christmas (not this year obviously), and I think there’s a dry ski slope within 100 miles or so.

It’s not too cold here – anywhere between 2 and 11 degrees. Walking rather than “hiking” is my thing, and there’s not much sports going on this year with The Covid.

Do you give to charities or homeless that you might encounter, during this time of year, more than you do otherwise?
I give via direct debit. I don’t go into town much (not at all since March) so I don’t encounter much by way of charities in the street. I don’t think that’s happening this year anyway.

What is the most enjoyable activity you engage in during December? Is it a tradition for you and your family?
There’s always my traditional Christmas Eve Die Hard and present wrapping marathon. And of course, Christmas Day with Mum and Dad, which will be different this year but still going ahead.

What changes will C-19 bring to your festive celebrations this year?
Slightly reduced I think. And I’ll likely be wearing a mask (except while eating) as I always do when visiting my parents, though my parents are getting their first vaccine jab this coming week so they’ll be somewhat protected.

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

What would you enjoy if you could do so without someone getting annoyed with you for enjoying it? It MUST be something you aren’t supposed to enjoy because it is “bad for you”.
Ha, there isn’t anyone to get annoyed with me for doing “bad for me” things so I do what I want heh heh 🙂

Is it okay for men to wear the colour pink?
Of course. I wore a (pale) pink shirt to a wedding a few years ago, and quite a few chaps there wore the same.

Can you curl your tongue?
I checked, and apparently I can! Hooray. I knew I had a superpower.

What, in your opinion, is the best room to put a fireplace?
Sorry to sound traditional, but the living room. It where most people spend most of their at home awake time.

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

What is worse than a dentist with bad breath?
A proctologist with a power drill.

Have you ever been rejected by someone that you liked, or been told that you were not good enough for somebody else?
Ha!

“Um… fancy going out for a drink after work?
“Yeah, sounds good!”
woohoo!
“Great, place round the corner at 6?”
“Yep. Who else is coming?”
Nooooooo!

Did you ever want to have toast for breakfast, only to find that all your bread was covered in green mould?
Result. Extra penicillin, set you up for the day.

Did you ever sneeze so hard that your whole body hurt?
Not my whole body but my head. Makes me worry I’ve burst a blood vessel 😦

Did you ever buy clothing on the internet that did not fit, but you wore them anyway, since you didn’t want to pay the £5 shipping charge to send them back?
No. I only buy clothes on the internet if they’re a known brand and I understand their sizing system. Most places these days have a handy size chart, as obviously one company’s “XL” is another company’s “M”.

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World. We have a new COVID-themed image this week!

Is cereal soup? Why or why not?
What? No. Surely not! Milk makes me throw up anyway so all that leaves is the dry Rice Crispies. Not very soup-like.

I suppose if you wait for the cereal to get soggy and mash it all up you’d get a soup-like substance. Like gruel. Yum.

What are some interesting ways to answer everyday questions like “how’s it going” or “what do you do”?
“What’s ‘it’? You’re talking nonsense, man. You need to define your terms. Moron.”

“What do I do when? At night? During the day? When I’m out and about? Be more precise! Moron.”

(Taken from my upcoming book “How to lose friends and piss everyone off”.)

What was your favourite toy growing up?
I remember two. There was my bike. I’d cycle all around town visiting friends. The other was a cool castle my Dad made for me and my brother out of wood. Battlements, a drawbridge, it had everything!

If you have a pet, and you could ask it three questions, what would you ask?
I don’t but I’ve had cats so let’s go with a cat.

“Why are you peeing on the carpet?”
“Are you taking the piss? If you are, please take it off the carpet and outside.”
“When you look at me are you thinking about how I’d make good eating?”