draliman on life

Weekly Writing Challenge: The Best Medicine – This week, write about whatever topic you’d like, but go for laughs.

Write about whatever I want? I can do that! No bother. Not a problem.

Wait a sec though – “go for laughs”? Well, there’s the rub. Humour is so subjective, and I’m not the funniest fella at the best of times. Tell you what, I’ll shoot for “mildly witty” and we’ll see where we end up.

The title of this post – “Never Happy” – is perhaps not a promising start. I don’t know about you, but to me that doesn’t scream “side-splittingly riotously hilarious” (try saying that three times fast). It sounds more like I’m going to have a rant, or maybe I’m going to wax lyrical about something that’s really getting me down.

So what, I hear you ask, am I going to complain about? I’ll give you a clue – I’m British.

That’s right! It’s the weather. That’s not what you guessed? Pretend you did! I’ll never know.

I’ve complained about the weather before (British, remember?). It’s too cold. It’s icy. It’s too windy. It won’t stop raining. Here’s a new one for you – it’s too hot!

“Never Happy” by DraliDoodles (TM)

Let’s take a quick Haiku-break.

Hostile sun blazing fire
Melting roads and hearts and minds
Air con broken

Hope you enjoyed it.

As I drove home this evening the thermometer informed me that it was 26 degrees C. I’ve just used the marvel which is Google and it informs me that this equals 78.8 Fahrenheit! I know what some of you are thinking. “That’s not very hot!” Well, it is to me. It appears that “too hot” is as subjective as humour.

My office is eco-friendly. We don’t have that planet-destroying toxic chemical-fuelled air con. Oh no! We have some sort of “comfort cooling” air recycling system. Today it managed to get the temperature to a not-so-comfortable 28 degrees C. Way to go, eco-friendly comfort cooling air con.

I didn’t wear shorts, but I did break out my trousers with the detachable legs. Detachable legs! What’ll they think of next? I was going to post a picture of me wearing the trousers with one leg removed so you could see the flexibility, but I thought that some of you might be reading this while eating dinner. I worried that the sight of my pasty-white leg might cause a case of the “tummy upsets”. So, no picture.

I also looked in my drawers for a light-weight T-shirt. It’s been so long since I’ve needed a light-weight T-shirt that it had mould on it from sitting in the drawer for years.

Mould!

And to add very serious insult to injury, it was my Red Dwarf T-shirt!

My poor mouldy T-shirt – please be OK!

I do hope the washing machine can work its magic.

It looks like I’m Never Happy.

Very sad.