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A Costly Mistake

It’s time for Friday Fictioneers again! As ever it is hosted by Rochelle, and this week she has also provided the picture – our task is to write a story, poem or whatnot in 100 words, inspired by said picture.

You can see all the other entries here – more are added all the time – stop by and have a read!

dismantled-keyboard

Copyright Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

Instruments lay smashed about the hotel room – heavy metal band β€œIron Biscuit” was well known for such destructive after-gig parties. A young blonde sobbed in a corner amid the wreckage. Her eyes were fixed on the lead singer, his body cold and rigid, his eyes unseeing, the syringe still stuck in his arm.

A few streets away a dealer lay on the floor staring in horror at the gory mess his kneecaps had become. He had forgotten to cut the last shipment and had sold it 100% pure. His boss, an unforgiving man, had not been pleased.

A costly mistake.

  1. October 25, 2013 at 6:41 pm

    graphic…

    Like

    • October 25, 2013 at 6:49 pm

      I hadn’t really thought about it, but it is, yes. I’ve “gone dark” again I guess.

      Like

  2. October 25, 2013 at 7:08 pm

    Damn! Dark, gritty, real. Well written.

    Like

  3. October 25, 2013 at 7:13 pm

    Someone took their Casio keyboard apart, and unbeknownst to them, it wound up killing a rock star and maiming a pusher in the future!

    Like

    • October 25, 2013 at 7:43 pm

      It’s quite safe to take a Yamaha apart, but those Casios…

      Like

  4. October 25, 2013 at 7:20 pm

    Drali.. really I’m a poor student but if you ever decide to write a novel, comic, or a bundle of short stories.. I’d be the first to buy it.

    Very dark, yet very engaging.

    Like

    • October 25, 2013 at 7:45 pm

      Thank you so much, Purni!
      Maybe one day I will put together a little collection of works – you will get a free copy (signed of course) πŸ™‚

      Like

  5. October 25, 2013 at 8:34 pm

    Wow. Very dark, and unfortunately, probably very realistic. Well done.

    Like

    • October 25, 2013 at 8:47 pm

      Thanks!
      I’m sure it has happened before and will happen again, unfortunately.

      Like

  6. October 25, 2013 at 9:19 pm

    So much conveyed in so few words. Brilliant.

    Like

    • October 26, 2013 at 3:05 am

      Thanks! For the first time ever I hit below 100 words and had to add some in, would you believe.
      I’m glad you enjoyed it.

      Like

  7. October 25, 2013 at 10:57 pm

    I think that may have happened during the 60’s. πŸ™‚ Very realistic.

    janet

    Like

    • October 26, 2013 at 3:06 am

      That sounds like the right decade for such tragic events, sure enough.

      Like

  8. October 26, 2013 at 1:15 am

    A gritty, dark and realistic story. You packed a lot in. Well done.

    Like

    • October 26, 2013 at 3:12 am

      Thank you. My mind went down a rather darker path this week!

      Like

  9. October 26, 2013 at 7:15 am

    Ahh, so fine. Thank you for letting your dark back out. I enjoy how you just go there so well.
    I want a copy also, but I’ld like a novel.

    Like

    • October 27, 2013 at 4:19 am

      I’m glad you enjoyed it. Writing “dark” is more me, I think πŸ™‚
      If there’s ever a novel you’re on the special signed copy list, but I don’t think I have the endurance or patience for such an endeavour!

      Like

  10. October 26, 2013 at 12:14 pm

    Grim piece. Just another night in the city I guess.

    Like

    • October 27, 2013 at 4:36 am

      Sadly I would imagine things like this are happening even as I type this.

      Like

  11. October 26, 2013 at 1:06 pm

    Dear Draliman,

    That was grim, gruesome and gripping. I’m going to my happy spot now.

    shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

    • October 27, 2013 at 5:12 am

      Hi Rochelle,
      I don’t think it was meant to be quite that dark at the outset, but the moment I saw the picture it sort of wrote itself.
      Thanks for reading!

      Like

  12. October 26, 2013 at 1:06 pm

    Dear Draliman,

    A dark and dingy piece, fresh off the streets, full of grit and realism. A very imaginative take on the prompt.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    Like

    • October 27, 2013 at 5:17 am

      Hi Doug,
      Thanks! I usually don’t write very real-life stuff but the moment I saw the picture this is the story that appeared in my head.

      Like

  13. kz
    October 26, 2013 at 3:08 pm

    great story. very dark, and very very real. well done πŸ™‚

    Like

    • October 27, 2013 at 5:28 am

      Thanks! I’m glad you enjoyed my foray into “real life” πŸ™‚

      Like

  14. October 27, 2013 at 11:08 am

    Gruesome tale. Often true, I am afraid to say. Not what I expected after the name of the band, Iron biscuit. I bet you started out planning a humorous tale, but it wound up quite dark.

    Like

    • October 27, 2013 at 2:41 pm

      I actually half-hoped that a humorous name for the band might make the resulting tragedy more of a shock. Plus, of course, there are so many bands out there and I had to find a name which wasn’t at least indexed in Google! I wouldn’t want to accidentally start a rumour that the lead singer of an actual band had overdosed 😦

      Like

  15. October 28, 2013 at 9:38 pm

    Wow! What an introduction into a world of which I know almost nothing. Great read…

    Like

    • October 29, 2013 at 7:47 am

      It’s probably best not to have any first-hand experience of that world!
      I’m glad you enjoyed it πŸ™‚

      Like

  1. December 22, 2013 at 9:12 am

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