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Spider Army

Spider General

I have a fear, a nagging fear
Keeps running through my head
I’m worried there’s a spider army
Underneath my bed.

Spiders On The MoveI’m sure that sometimes I can hear
The spiders at their drill
And just the thought they’re coming out
Can give me such a chill!

I fear one day they’ll sally forth
Parade across my floor
Marching all in single file
To slip beneath my door.

They’ll leave my house but make no sound
On tiny, tiny feet
So no-one hears them coming
As they march off down the street.

Spiders Eat The Wires

They might go in the bakery
And eat up all the bread
Or chew the wires in traffic lights
Until they’re stuck on red!

Spiders At The School

Perhaps they’ll mess up all the bins
By taking off the lids
Or maybe they’ll invade the school
And frighten all the kids.
I must admit I just don’t care,
Don’t care what they attack
As long as all the little guys
Are never coming back!

Spiders No Entry

  1. November 3, 2013 at 11:04 am

    EEK. Spiders! Can I used your “no spider” badge?


    • November 3, 2013 at 11:13 am

      Of course you can – I hope it keeps the spider army from your door šŸ™‚


  2. November 3, 2013 at 1:44 pm

    I know where they are… they have set up a fortress at my front door. I didn’t need to put up fake webbing for Halloween this year….


    • November 3, 2013 at 5:27 pm

      Ha! You’re welcome to them. Don’t send them back, I don’t want them!
      Try printing out a copy of the “no spiders” image at the bottom of the post – maybe they’ll take heed šŸ™‚


  3. merbear74
    November 3, 2013 at 2:58 pm

    This was great!


    • November 3, 2013 at 5:28 pm

      Thanks! I had “kiddies’ book” in mind when I wrote it (that’s why it’s so PG) šŸ™‚


  4. November 3, 2013 at 6:15 pm

    Is that you, Shel Silverstein? Awesome post!


  5. November 4, 2013 at 3:41 am

    I have this same fear ~ A spider army really does top my list for fears I don’t want to see actualized! šŸ™‚
    Delightful dralidoodles today, my friend!


    • November 4, 2013 at 7:27 am

      Let’s hope they never get organised! At the moment there’s a lot of infighting but if a powerful spider leader ever emerges…
      I’m glad you enjoyed the doodles šŸ™‚


  6. November 4, 2013 at 10:48 am

    I LOVE this!!! šŸ™‚


    • November 4, 2013 at 11:47 am

      Thanks! It was a lot of fun to write and “illustrate” šŸ™‚
      I’d like to do more of these until I have a hypothetical children’s book of funny little poems.


      • November 4, 2013 at 11:51 am

        It doesn’t have to be hypothetical. You should definately do some more.


  7. November 4, 2013 at 10:10 pm

    uber awesome.. absolutely love the doodles and the words… don’t wait for hypothetical children.. there are already so many on the planet (and people like me, who need to grow up).

    did I mention uber awesome? yes yes uberawesome!


    • November 5, 2013 at 7:21 am

      I’m glad you liked it. “Uber awesome”, that’s pretty high praise, thank you šŸ™‚


  8. November 5, 2013 at 9:30 am

    I share the same fear šŸ™‚


    • November 5, 2013 at 9:46 am

      You’re certainly not alone, I think it must be one of the most common fears around šŸ™‚


  9. November 5, 2013 at 11:32 am

    I collect spiders, my roommates hate them, so I keep planting them on their path.
    Great post!


    • November 5, 2013 at 11:37 am

      Although spiders scare me, I must admit that if I knew someone who collected them I’d probably be round all the time, staring through the glass with a look of horrified fascination on my face. As long as they stayed behind the glass šŸ™‚
      Glad you liked the post!


  10. November 5, 2013 at 9:03 pm

    My sister won’t sleep in her room sometimes because of this fear. I’m serious – she has actually slept out in the living room, on the couch because she thought she saw a spider in her room. She is absolutely terrified of them!

    This was a really fun post. I enjoyed the drawings too!


    • November 5, 2013 at 9:30 pm

      If I see a spider in my bedroom, I’ll hunt around for hours trying to catch it! I can’t bear the thought of it clambering over me while I’m asleep šŸ˜¦
      I’m glad you enjoyed the post! I did it “PG” rated because I thought that a longer version (with some slightly more professional illustrations) might make a good children’s book.


      • November 6, 2013 at 1:34 pm

        Well, I can understand that. The thought of a spider crawling on me…*shudders*
        I think would be a wonderful idea! This would make a great children’s book (especially for those afraid of spiders!)


        • November 6, 2013 at 2:20 pm

          That’s what I reckoned. Give the little mites a funny fright before bedtime!


          • November 6, 2013 at 3:34 pm

            Haha quite so! If nothing else, they can relate!


  11. November 13, 2013 at 8:49 pm

    What a wonderful poem, I grew up terrified of spiders because my mother was a spider-phobe. Thankfully I’ve got over it now, but they still make me jump if one turns up unexpectedly. Great pics & I agree with those above who think this could be a great one for a kids book šŸ™‚


    • November 13, 2013 at 9:12 pm

      I’ll still run for it if I see a spider. They’re so fast on their feet!
      I’m glad you liked the poem. Hopefully at some point I’ll try to write a few more verses and a few more poems in the same kid-friendly style.


  12. July 29, 2014 at 6:08 pm

    Hey DM, this is Mer…I would like to invite you to follow my new blog.


    • July 30, 2014 at 7:11 am

      I’m in! Thanks for letting me know about your new blog šŸ™‚


  13. July 13, 2018 at 4:18 pm

    Not a fan of the arachnid, eh?
    Fun poem, Alistair!


  14. July 14, 2018 at 5:02 am

    Ha ha ha. Reminds me of a story I wrote 12 years ago on my previous blog šŸ™‚ http://jagahdilmein.blogspot.com/2006/05/


    • July 14, 2018 at 5:22 am

      Oh, poor Raj and Simran, squished in their prime!
      Glad you liked it!


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