Home > Fiction > FF – Wife Unfazed

FF – Wife Unfazed

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Fatima Fakier Deria.

 

“Hey, get outta the way! Yes, you! Where’s that horn…”

Whaaaa wha wha whaaaa!

“What you lookin’ at? You wanna piece ‘a me? YOU WANNA PIECE ‘A ME? Thought not. Coming through! Oy, you with the vegetable boat. SHIFT IT! Full speed ahead…”

Smash crunch sink sink sink

“…screw you and your cabbages…”

Meanwhile, below-decks…

“Yes, Dorothy, on the canals… his stress levels? Not noticeably, no… it was supposed to be a de-stresser for top executives, yes… not working, no…”

“Aaaargh!” splash

“…think he’s fallen in… go back for him? No, I don’t think so… much more enjoyable now, yes…”

 

  1. June 20, 2018 at 4:21 pm

    Sounds like the de-stressing went perfect… for her.

    Liked by 2 people

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:44 am

      Yep! I started out “same old” but has taken a definite turn for the better!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. June 20, 2018 at 5:39 pm

    Sounds like a Monday morning commute. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. June 20, 2018 at 6:11 pm

    Nothing like a good throwing people in the canal to get some stress of your chest… 😀

    Like

  4. June 20, 2018 at 6:13 pm

    Instead of road rage … Very entertaining! 🙂

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:45 am

      They don’t have enough roads in Venice, they’ve had to improvise 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. June 20, 2018 at 7:17 pm

    🙀….MOL 😀 Great story, Draliman 😀 Pawkisses for a Happy Day 🙂 ❤

    Like

  6. June 20, 2018 at 7:45 pm

    I love that “much more enjoyable now” line,.

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:46 am

      It’s quite a relief for her, I’m sure 🙂 I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  7. June 20, 2018 at 8:58 pm

    Smooth sailing for her! 😀

    Like

  8. June 20, 2018 at 9:00 pm

    Clearly hasn’t read the canal etiquette handbook!

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:48 am

      He’s the sort of person who doesn’t believe rules are meant for him… 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  9. June 20, 2018 at 11:18 pm

    So funny. Talk about out of his element! You take a man out of the city, but you cant take the city of of the man!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. June 21, 2018 at 3:46 am

    So… that went well… 😉

    Like

  11. June 21, 2018 at 8:26 am

    I think he’s swopped one kind of stress for another. But at least he’ll be a little cooler now. In fact, everyone will.

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:17 pm

      It’s worked out well for everyone!

      Like

  12. June 21, 2018 at 8:39 am

    I’ve heard that petting sharks can lower your blood pressure and reduce stress. I guess we’ll find out…

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:20 pm

      After they chomp down your blood pressure quickly lowers to zero. And stress is the least (or last) of your worries.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. June 21, 2018 at 8:54 am

    How romantic 🙂

    Like

  14. June 21, 2018 at 9:52 am

    That was pretty frantic!

    Click to read my FriFic tale

    Like

  15. June 21, 2018 at 10:38 am

    Hahaha

    Like

  16. June 21, 2018 at 11:19 am

    Dear Ali,

    We all de-stress in our own ways, don’t we? 😉 Funny. Well not for the big mouth who went overboard.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:26 pm

      Dear Rochelle,
      Everyone will be a lot less stressed now that he’s out of the way 🙂
      Ali

      Like

  17. June 21, 2018 at 1:28 pm

    Good one… methinks thou doest need to de-stress… loved it! I can only imagine the traffic jam on the canal, too.

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:27 pm

      I’m sure some of the canals in Venice are as busy as the roads in some cities at rush hour 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  18. June 21, 2018 at 1:34 pm

    Well, at least SHE got de-stressed 🙂

    Like

  19. June 21, 2018 at 1:42 pm

    Ha, ha. You can put another notch on your blog. You’ve killed off another character, Ali. At least it was a happy ending for his wife. 😀 — Suzanne

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:27 pm

      She’s rather pleased and looking forward to the rest of her holiday 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  20. June 21, 2018 at 3:33 pm

    Haha! Nice one, Ali! Will he be any cooler when he climbs out, or just steaming, I wonder?

    Like

    • June 21, 2018 at 5:30 pm

      Probably steaming but she’ll be off down the canal by then 🙂

      Like

  21. June 21, 2018 at 9:11 pm

    Ha! I keep being told how relaxing canal boats are and you’ve proved my own instincts were right – they aren’t at all! Great stuff

    Like

    • June 23, 2018 at 5:15 am

      Inevitably there will be a jam or a wait at a lock or it’ll sink or some such 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • June 26, 2018 at 10:24 am

        Yes indeed! Or one of those long staircases of locks that take hours to get through! 🙂

        Like

      • June 27, 2018 at 5:32 pm

        🙂

        Like

  22. June 21, 2018 at 10:09 pm

    well, i just hope she knows how to swim. 🙂

    Like

    • June 23, 2018 at 5:17 am

      As long as he doesn’t manage to swim back to the boat she’ll be happy 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  23. June 22, 2018 at 3:30 am

    I love the way you combined all the snatches of conversation. Great job.

    Like

  24. June 22, 2018 at 11:35 am

    Great job of the diologue. You captured the different characters very well.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

    Like

    • June 23, 2018 at 5:18 am

      Thanks, I’m glad their quite different personalities came through!

      Liked by 1 person

  25. June 22, 2018 at 2:26 pm

    Brilliant. And I don’t blame her for leaving him behind!

    Like

    • June 23, 2018 at 5:19 am

      Me neither – she deserves a holiday too! I’m glad you liked it.

      Liked by 1 person

  26. June 22, 2018 at 5:58 pm

    Great dialogue giving a sense of these characters. She will definitely have a better time now he’s fallen off.

    Like

    • June 23, 2018 at 5:20 am

      She will for sure. A holiday from him!

      Like

  27. June 22, 2018 at 10:09 pm

    The contrast of him yelling at the cabbage vendor while she below decks calmly talking is truly entertaining. Somehow, because it’s been a long day, I hope he can’t swim. Thanks for the smile, Ali.

    Like

    • June 23, 2018 at 5:25 am

      The poor woman’s so used to it by now she’s created herself a shell. With any luck, at the very least the rescue will take enough time for her boat to get out of range 🙂 I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  28. June 23, 2018 at 7:40 am

    I don’t want big mouth to actually drown. I want him to have a humiliating rescue. Then I want her to find some peaceful waters away from him where she can tell other people the story and laugh her socks off. Terrific dialogue.

    Like

    • June 23, 2018 at 8:00 am

      Me too! We don’t want him dead, we want him horribly humiliated. Bring him down a peg or two while she has a nice relaxing holiday 🙂
      I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  29. June 24, 2018 at 5:11 pm

    Great stuff, wonderful comedy, well done

    Like

  30. June 25, 2018 at 7:11 am

    You have filled my eyes with tears… my mouth with smiles… Thank you, Ali. The humour here is so Italian. Chow!

    Like

  31. June 25, 2018 at 7:28 am

    Fighting traffic on waterways is no less stressful than doing so on motorways. 😜

    Like

  32. June 26, 2018 at 8:24 am

    I feel sorry for the unlucky boat and its passengers who take pity on him and scoop him out of the water.

    Like

    • June 27, 2018 at 5:32 pm

      I’m guessing they won’t get any thanks!

      Like

  33. June 27, 2018 at 5:18 pm

    Oh dear – the de-stressing experience went horribly wrong ! Who said Venetian canals guaranteed serenity ?

    Like

    • June 27, 2018 at 5:34 pm

      Probably someone who’s never been to Venice (I haven’t either but it looked pretty busy in the photo) 🙂

      Like

  34. June 30, 2018 at 1:43 am

    Made me chuckle. My best mate lived a canal boat- Kennet and Avon Nr Bath – many moons ago. We had such fun, which usually involves cider, hic. Nice blog brought back happy memories. Oh the tales I could tell.

    Like

    • June 30, 2018 at 10:41 am

      That does sound lovely! It sounds like the sort of thing I would have jumped at in my younger days. I rarely venture as far north as Bath these days but I seem to recall it’s a lovely area.

      Liked by 1 person

  35. June 30, 2018 at 11:00 pm

    feels so New York – and well done – could feel this character

    Like

    • July 1, 2018 at 5:45 am

      Thanks! He’s definitely from some big city where everyone crashes around the place yelling at each other.

      Liked by 1 person

      • July 1, 2018 at 2:28 pm

        ha – that rings true right here because we had a car actually flip over at a WA Wa gas station yesterday – all from road rage

        Like

      • July 2, 2018 at 4:50 am

        Yikes.

        Liked by 1 person

      • July 3, 2018 at 3:16 pm

        🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  1. No trackbacks yet.

Speak to me - I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: