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FF – Virus!

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Na’ama Yehuda.

Copyright Na’ama Yehuda

Gurr’g’tharg surveyed the planet from above the clouds. It looked perfect. A great place to invade, he thought, when suddenly alarms whistled, lights flashed! He checked the readout.

“Warning! Contagion detected!”

Gurr’g’tharg checked his instruments. Indeed, it was true. The planet was beset by a virus, from pole to pole, leaving death and destruction in its wake! He triggered the communicator.

“Well, Gurr’g’tharg, how about this Earth place?”

“Sadly no, Leader,” lamented Gurr’g’tharg. “Take a look.”

“By Holy Mansh’m’gel’s testicles! The planet is riddled with…” he almost spat the word “…humans! Retreat!”

Earth’s animals breathed a sigh of relief. Humans had their uses…

  1. December 30, 2020 at 6:02 pm

    I agree; those humans are terrifying! 😀 Very interesting curse, Gurr’g’tharg.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. December 30, 2020 at 6:10 pm

    Oof! That last line. What a perfect twist, Dr Ali!

    Of course, that somehow brings back memories of Michel Farber’s novel, Under The Skin…

    (and yes! I figured out my password to MorrighansMuse again – to confuse you further!)

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 10:10 am

      Welcome back to your other moniker 🙂 I’m glad you enjoyed my little story!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. December 30, 2020 at 6:14 pm

    Mostly harmless

    Liked by 2 people

    • December 31, 2020 at 10:12 am

      I’m not so sure the Hitchhiker’s Guide was entirely accurate there. Well, currently harmless to the rest of the galaxy, perhaps.

      Like

  4. December 30, 2020 at 7:53 pm

    So glad we’re here as guardians of the animals from the alien plunderers! We humans have our uses after all. (Happy New Year, Ali!)

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 10:21 am

      Guarding them even if unwittingly. I hope you have a good new year too 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  5. December 30, 2020 at 8:03 pm

    Like Neil, my first thought was the Hitchhiker’s Guide!
    Hope they’re not Vogons…

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 10:27 am

      Me too. I’m not a massive fan of poetry at the best of times…

      Like

  6. Lyn
    December 30, 2020 at 9:20 pm

    Funny, yet very satisfying tale, D-Man 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 10:29 am

      Thanks, I’m glad you liked it!

      Like

  7. December 30, 2020 at 10:29 pm

    Excellent!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. December 31, 2020 at 12:39 am

    Never thought of it like that before. Humans do have practical use for Mother Earth! Thanks 🙂 Happy Holidays.

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 10:33 am

      Yes, we keep away the more discerning would-be space invaders! Happy holidays 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  9. December 31, 2020 at 12:58 am

    One of their few redeeming qualities, it must be said…

    Liked by 1 person

  10. December 31, 2020 at 12:59 am

    I bet they’d be better off with Gurr’g’tharg, though.

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 10:38 am

      Very likely. And if not, maybe better a quick death.

      Like

  11. December 31, 2020 at 10:33 am

    By Holy Mansh’m’gel’s testicles! Your curse makes me wonder whether the aliens may be even more prolific breeders than humans. Nice story, Ali!

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 10:42 am

      Yes, they seem to be an important part of their religion 🙂

      Like

  12. December 31, 2020 at 11:52 am

    A neat take on the prompt, and I love your way with curses! Happy 2021, minus aliens.

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 4:02 pm

      That curse is as strong as it gets in their world! Happy 2021 to you too 🙂

      Like

  13. December 31, 2020 at 12:17 pm

    Another brilliant tale in your inimitable style! Happy New Year!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. December 31, 2020 at 12:50 pm

    You’d think such an advanced race of aliens would have developed a disinfectant against nasty humans by now…

    Liked by 1 person

    • December 31, 2020 at 4:10 pm

      Yeah, or a really powerful laser rifle or something. I mean, who turns up to an invasion without a couple of really big bombs? I’m sure Zeeba could suggest something…

      Like

  15. December 31, 2020 at 2:26 pm

    I love the creative names you have come up with. And that last sentence is perfect 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  16. December 31, 2020 at 6:15 pm

    what a tale to the year! well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. December 31, 2020 at 8:10 pm

    Dear Ali,

    I don’t blame them for turning and speeding off. I would, too. Well done.

    Shalom and happy new year,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    • January 1, 2021 at 6:15 am

      Dear Rochelle,
      I fear our planet has gained something of a reputation 🙂
      Happy New Year!
      Ali

      Like

  18. January 1, 2021 at 1:39 pm

    Wishing you a happy and wonderful New Year 2021.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. January 1, 2021 at 8:49 pm

    I’m thinking they were right to turn around.
    Love your curse!!

    Like

    • January 3, 2021 at 11:05 am

      For sure! Yes, they’re a right load of potty-mouths, this bunch 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  20. January 2, 2021 at 4:51 am

    Haha… Not even the aliens want us. Animals might be better off with aliens though.

    Like

  21. January 5, 2021 at 4:40 pm

    Enjoyed! A unique spin of the story- as always. There are a few ‘human’ I would classify as contagions…. now that my mind is thinking of the list, maybe more than a few?

    Like

  22. January 5, 2021 at 8:47 pm

    Best part of the tale: By Holy Mansh’m’gel’s testicles! 😀

    Like

  23. Michael
    January 5, 2021 at 9:42 pm

    You made me, I really enjoyed this story

    Like

    • January 6, 2021 at 6:10 am

      Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it!

      Like

  24. January 5, 2021 at 10:03 pm

    Brilliant 😀 So glad to hear that we have our uses.

    Like

    • January 6, 2021 at 6:10 am

      I knew we must be good for something 🙂

      Like

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