Friday Fictioneers – Her Broken Heart
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s picture was contributed by Marie Gail Stratford.
To read this week’s other stories, click on the blue froggy.
Sitting slumped at the desk, she looked across at the easy chairs. The one on the left had been his. Empty now. Empty as her broken heart.
He was gone. Gone forever. Her love, her life, her everything.
Wiping a tear from her eye, she grabbed the mouse – his silly, ziggy-zaggy, beautiful mouse (that thought brought a lump to her throat) – and began searching. Chainsaw hire, mini-diggers, concreting and patio servicesβ¦
If her wonderful, beautiful, perfect Barry and slutty Sally from Accounts Payable enjoyed each other so much, they could bloody well spend eternity in the same hole.
Ali , are you trying to induce another chain-saw dream in me? π Nicely written.
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Ooh noo, sorry about that π
I’m glad you liked it!
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Oh, wow. She’s not feeling bitter or anything, is she? This made me laugh even though it’s so wicked. Nicely done, Ali.
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She’s a very forgiving sort π
I also found it amusing heh heh! I’m glad you liked it.
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That’s great! A whole spectrum of emotions and a wicked ending. Wouldn’t want to be on her bad side.
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I hoped to make it sound like a grieving widow until near the end π I wouldn’t want to be on her bad side either, she doesn’t sound entirely stable!
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Be careful with those chainsaws, they have a mind of their own!
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Yeah, she might end up in the hole too! If there’s one thing I have no desire to do, it’s hold a chainsaw. I’d be sure to chop off something I’ll need later.
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Hey, at least she got to keep the pretty mouse, right? π
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Every cloud and all that π
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I love how the fact that the other woman is from ACCOUNTS PAYABLE is what’s emphasized — too funny!
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If she’d been in Marketing, that would have been different π
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At first I felt sorry for her; then I realised the truth — as it could only be told by our D-Man π Love the mouse!
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Exactly what I was hoping for π
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LOL! Question — did you consider not adding the last paragraph at any point? Of course then I wouldn’t have found out about Sally π
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Funnily enough, I did. It was just going to be a grieving widow, then I thought “hang on, that’s not me! Someone has to to die horribly!”
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Whoa! Don’t cross her path. But at least the ‘he’ and ‘she’ will be together forever?
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They’ll have that, I suppose! Nice and cosy in a hole. Or possibly many holes π
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Hahaha! Jealousy has been going around in the flash fictions. LOL!
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It’s a popular topic, especially when it leads to murder most horrid π
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Ooh, wicked.
Randy
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Very!
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Wow – a movie in a story! Great job! Nan
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It would make a cool short film for someone at drama school π
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Haw Haw Haw Haw Haw! LOL! π
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Bzzzz… splatter π
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i didn’t expect it would end that way. always beware of the scorned woman.
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A nearly called it “A Woman Scorned” but didn’t want to give the game away.
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Whoa! Watch out! Revenge is sweet – I guess.
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And sometimes quite messy!
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Loved it! Totally pulled me along and whammo!
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Just when you’re starting to feel sorry for her…
I’m glad you liked it!
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At first I thought it was just a break up but then…Good twist at the end.
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I’m glad I managed to lead you down the wrong path. I’m happy you enjoyed the twist!
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A magnificent fantasy, I’ve fantasized over a similar thought. Think I would skip the chainsaw add a bed of nails and bury them alive.
Ahh to be that brave.
Thanks DrAli for the good dreams.
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Blimey! π
Funnily enough a couple of nights ago I had a dream about gutting someone with a kitchen knife. I wonder what that signifies? π¦
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knives need sharpening or
you are hungry, pick one π
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Hungry usually π
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All those computer searches will figure greatly at the trial! LOL Loved it!
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Ha, very true! Search history is being used more and more these days. Then they’ll come round and dig up her lovely new patio π¦
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Do not upset the lady!
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Too late!
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Sheesh… a couple hundred pounds of fertilizer, and she’s going to erect a concrete patio over it? She should look up a gardener instead…
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She’s not thinking straight! Think of the prize-winning roses she could grow.
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Yes! The biggest, brightest roses in the world. Those people from Accounts payable are so full of sh…. organic compounds!
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Tee hee – love it!
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I’m glad! There’s nothing like a humorously murderous twist π
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I’m guessing she’s not a girl to take rejection lightly then! Nice one.
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She’s also quite prone to overreact!
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Dear Ali,
Time for a little landscaping eh? Hell hath no fury…well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
Thanks! New life, new patio π
Ali
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Ooh, dark and scary, Ali.
I wouldn’t dare watch a chain-saw movie. I’d have nightmares from then on. This reminds me of one of Agatha Christie’s books. No one used a chainsaw though. This was not a woman to cheat on. Well done. π — Suzanne
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I love watching people get chainsawed up (in fiction) π
She’s definitely a woman to be kept happy at all costs.
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I loved the quick flit between sorrow then murder, great job π
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Thanks, that’s just what I was aiming for π
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Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
Good piece.
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Very true! And in this case, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned who has access to a chainsaw π
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Scorned woman and chainsaw is a most unhealthy mix.
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My my! I think she’s a wee bit p*ssed! Great story.
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Just a little :-). I’m glad you liked it!
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I love the way you did this, moving her through grief to covering her tracks. I felt sorry for her and then she turns into a proper FF bunny boiler!
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I’m glad you liked the way I set this out. I thought it was about time for some good old-fashioned revenge here on FF π
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Never betray a woman with knowledge of how to mix concrete… chainsaw… last time I let someone be killed it was a meat-cleaver i think
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A meat cleaver works too, but it’s a lot more effort.
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Revenge: A dish best served with a chain saw. Funny stuff Ali.
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Ha! Thanks, glad you liked it π
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That’s a very cool mouse. I could get my head behind it. Probably not the chain saw, though, especially not if used on me.
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I’m not sure if that mouse might make my eyes go funny π
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Great how you pulled us all along. Think twice before breaking a person’s heart, I say. I think that mouse brings out violent thoughts…
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It is the sort of pattern which makes one go “rarrr!”
I’m glad you liked it π
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Oh lovely. Really enjoyed that surprise ending.
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Thanks, I’m glad you liked the twist!
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Seems fair.
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π
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Wow! She’s taking it rather well, isn’t she? Not vengeful, or spiteful, or anything like that!
I loved the sad, sentimental drivelling over “his silly, ziggy-zaggy, beautiful mouse (that thought brought a lump to her throat),” which is quickly followed by her thought that they could “bloody well spend eternity” together.
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She’s quite a complex character… π
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π
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