Home > Fiction > Counting Sheep

Counting Sheep

It may not be Friday, but it’s certainly time for Friday Fictioneers! Hosted every week by the talented Rochelle, a whole host of people write a roughly 100 word story in response to a photo, which this week has been contributed by fellow Fictioneerer Sandra Crook.

To read the other stories for this week click on the little blue froggy, whom I have named “Bracken”.


Copyright Sandra Crook

“Look out! Run for your lives and don’t look back!”

“What? Are you not asleep yet? I thought you were counting sheep?”

“Yeah, awesome zombie sheep! They’ve surrounded a car and they’re eating the occupants. There’s blood and body parts everywhere. They’re bleating ‘baa baa baaaarains!’”

“Okay, this isn’t working. Try counting something else.”

“Like what?”

“Something a little more soothing. A little more sedate. Like cows. Try counting cows. I need to sleep myself, I’ve got a meeting tomorrow.”

“Cows it is then.”

Ten minutes later…

“Woah! Run!”

“Ugh. What is it now?!”

“Awesome vampire cows!”


  1. May 15, 2014 at 6:19 pm

    Oh no, now I’ve got Baa baa baa – baa baa baarains to the tune of the Beach Boys stuck in my head. Zombie sheep & vampire cows, how do you dream this stuff up lol, it’s so kool 🙂


    • May 15, 2014 at 7:25 pm

      It does fit to the music, doesn’t it? Now I’ve got it stuck in my head too.
      I was going to do an “approaching tsunami” story but decided on some comedy instead 🙂


      • May 15, 2014 at 8:37 pm

        I’m glad you did, it made me laugh 🙂


  2. NotAPunkRocker
    May 15, 2014 at 7:08 pm

    Ok, I really needed this one today. Baa baa brains has me cracking up, my coworkers probably think I have snapped.

    Bracken? Kind of cool 🙂


    • May 15, 2014 at 7:27 pm

      I’m glad I brought a smile to your face today.
      I figured the little blue froggy needed a name 🙂


  3. May 15, 2014 at 7:30 pm

    Vampire cows and zombie sheep. Now THAT’S a farm for Old MacDonald!


    • May 15, 2014 at 7:49 pm

      “… and on that farm he had some UNHOLY UNDEAD CREATURES OF THE NETHER REALMS, ee ay ee ay oh…”


  4. May 15, 2014 at 8:35 pm

    MOL…I liked it, Draliman. Can you do that with mice too..MOL..Pawkiss 🙂


    • May 16, 2014 at 10:39 am

      I’m sure it would also work with mice 🙂


  5. May 15, 2014 at 9:40 pm

    1) I feel so much better now because apparently I’m not the only one who saw this picture and – for no reason I can immediately identify- my first thought was Zombie Apocalypse!
    2) And Vampire Cows!! I can totally see that too, now.
    Thank you.


    • May 16, 2014 at 10:41 am

      I’m not exactly sure how my brain got from sheep to zombies 🙂
      Maybe it reminded me of some scenes from The Walking Dead.


  6. gentlestitches
    May 15, 2014 at 10:05 pm

    HaHa! Funny! Hi Bracken, it is good to have a name.


    • May 16, 2014 at 10:41 am

      We all use him but never named him. He works so hard I thought he needed naming!


  7. May 15, 2014 at 10:21 pm

    I love it!


    • May 16, 2014 at 10:42 am

      Thanks for reading – I’m glad you loved it!


      • May 16, 2014 at 11:38 pm

        I printed it and brought it to work for my zombie loving friends to read. Everyone laughed out loud.


        • May 17, 2014 at 4:43 am

          That’s so cool, I’m glad they liked it!


  8. May 16, 2014 at 3:49 am

    Loved this story!

    I have so much trouble sleeping…maybe I should be counting awesome vampire cows!!!


  9. May 16, 2014 at 7:06 am

    Dear Draliman, AWESOME – Vampire Cows – who would of thought of that? You are so clever! Great story and I enjoyed it a lot! Funny!!!! Nan 🙂


    • May 16, 2014 at 10:44 am

      I think vampire cows would look rather comical 🙂 I’m glad you enjoyed my story!


  10. May 16, 2014 at 10:38 am

    Counting sheep (or cows) certainly doesn’t work for people with active imaginations! Your story was a moment of joy in the middle of a hectic day 🙂


    • May 16, 2014 at 10:45 am

      It’s hard imagining them leaping over a fence or whatever when they could be feasting on humans.
      I’m glad I was able to brighten up your day!


  11. Helena Hann-Basquiat
    May 16, 2014 at 12:27 pm

    This was so funny, darling — such wonderful humour. If you’d had more room, you might have gone on to count crows — and a group of crows is called, of course, a murder.


    • May 16, 2014 at 3:33 pm

      Thanks, I’m glad you enjoyed it!
      I’d forgotten that it’s a “murder of crows” – that would have fit in perfectly.


  12. May 16, 2014 at 1:42 pm

    Baa baa baaaaaarains…. Too funny!


  13. May 16, 2014 at 4:09 pm

    Hee hee, a return to your dark side I see, you do it so well 🙂


    • May 16, 2014 at 5:41 pm

      It’s not every day I get to squeeze in both zombies and vampires 🙂


  14. May 16, 2014 at 4:44 pm

    Funny! I love the idea of cows being more docile then sheep. They’re both a little on the no-baaaarains side. Har har.


    • May 16, 2014 at 5:42 pm

      I think cows are just lazier – until they get all riled up!


  15. May 16, 2014 at 7:42 pm

    Wow! What’s next? Cannibal cats? Great stuff.


    • May 16, 2014 at 7:54 pm

      Cannibal cats – now there’s an idea…


  16. May 16, 2014 at 8:51 pm

    Ha, this sounds like me trying to fall asleep. Starts off quite orderly and relatively peaceful and before you know it… BRAINNNSSS.


    • May 17, 2014 at 4:37 am

      Don’t you just hate it when that happens 🙂


  17. May 16, 2014 at 9:26 pm

    I would go for were-rabbits.. that works well except in full-moon.


    • May 17, 2014 at 4:38 am

      It’s always awkward when Floppsy the bunny goes “were” once a month and eats all your friends.


  18. May 17, 2014 at 8:55 am

    Al, Personally, I think the sheep and cow unions might just try and sue you for defamitory remarks. You better have your defense ready. XD Seriously, that was funny which I guess isn’t very serious. 🙂 Your story seemed to make quite an impression. —Susan


    • May 18, 2014 at 5:42 am

      If they can prove definitively that none of their cow or sheep members have been turned into the undead, I’ll gladly print a retraction 🙂


  19. May 17, 2014 at 3:48 pm

    Hahaha that is awesome. Sounds like something my boyfriend do…only they would be space sheep. :p

    P.S. Love that you named the froggy “Braken.” Where’d the inspiration for that come from?


    • May 18, 2014 at 5:43 am

      Space sheep sound cool!

      A couple of names for the little guy went through my head, but “Bracken” just seemed to suit him for some reason 🙂


  20. May 18, 2014 at 2:42 pm

    Dear Ali,

    Perhaps you’re onto something. I mean look what Hitchcock did with The Birds. Nothing is more horrifying than innocuous creatures becoming flesh eating monsters. Maybe the guy should try counting something like pencils or paper clips to go to sleep. Fun story.




    • May 18, 2014 at 3:33 pm

      Dear Rochelle,
      Yes, something so normal and safe going so wrong is always scary. I’m not sure his weird mind wouldn’t be able to concoct something horrific with stationery but it’s worth a try!


  21. May 18, 2014 at 4:02 pm

    Oh no! Maybe he should count bunnies instead. Baa baa baaaarains…I haven’t heard that one before! Funny story, Alistair.


    • May 18, 2014 at 4:03 pm

      I dunno – did you ever see that killer bunny in Monty Python and the Holy Grail? It took the Holy Hand Grenade to take care of him!
      I’m glad you enjoyed it 🙂


  22. May 19, 2014 at 7:58 am

    This made me laugh out loud – loved it. I could see it as a comedy sketch.


    • May 19, 2014 at 9:19 am

      It would make a good comedy sketch. I don’t have any contacts in “show-biz” unfortunately 🙂


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