FF – Plug Gate
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, the 100 word challenge hosted by Rochelle with a photo this week by C. E. Ayr.
I did think of a dark story to do with the take over of jobs by machines, but in the end I went for this ridiculous little news story.
To read the other stories, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright C. E. Ayr
Excerpt from The Daily Prattle
The inquest into the “PlugGate” incident on Britain’s railways, which last April caused 745 deaths and millions of pounds of damage, closed today.
The coroner heard that the new Automated Railway Signalling Equipment (ARSE) system was deactivated when contract cleaner Mrs Moira Dimple, 47, unplugged it as she, in her own words, “needed somewhere to plug in my vacuum cleaner, dearie.”
National Rail has reassured customers that such a disaster could never happen again as they have “invested in loads of Sellotape to stick over the plug sockets”.
This reporter remains sceptical and will be taking the bus.
Sharing My World 2017 Week 1
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World series, as we fire off into 2017.
Would you prefer to receive a unicycle, bicycle, tricycle or motorcycle?
The very thought of me on a unicycle makes me laugh.
Ha ha ha.
I can barely stay upright on a bicycle any more let alone only one wheel. Given this, I’m going to go with a suggestion I gave to another SYW participant – a motortrike, or whatever you want to call it. Take look at this bad boy, for example. Can’t you just see me roaring around the place on this?
From motorcycles-for-sale.biz
What is one thing you’d like to accomplish this year?
I don’t really do “life goals” and whatnot. Just getting through the year without screwing anything up would be good.
What was one of the highlights of 2016 for you?
I guess when I was promoted to Systems Architect. I don’t really remember anything else happening of note. I’m probably forgetting something important.
Would you prefer to fly a kite or fly in a hot air balloon?
Wow, the mundane to the amazing. Well, I’ve flown kites of course so I’ll go for a ride in a hot air balloon. That sounds like a lot of fun, floating in the quiet over the countryside. I see lots of SYW participants have gone for this option, so I’d better book my flight early to avoid disappointment!
FF – Master and Student
Here is my post for Friday Fictioneers, the 100 word writing challenge hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo comes from Sandra Crook.
A bit of a silly story this week but once I got it in my head I couldn’t think of anything else. It looked to me like one of those elaborate things you set up in that game “Mousetrap”.
To read the other stories, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright Sandra Crook
“How does it work, Master?”
“Observe. He approaches. The door opens…”
Clunk
“… loosing the ball bearing to roll down the plank, triggering the mechanism…”
Rumble
“… the cog turns…”
Griiiind
“… releasing the flour above…”
Cough cough
“… thus blocking out the light…”
Huh?
“… our target lights a match…”
Scrape
“… igniting the flour particles…”
Whoomp!
“… blowing him to pieces.”
Aaaarggggh!
“Couldn’t we have just blown his brains out with a sawn-off shotgun, Sensei?”
“Finesse, young Padawan. Beauty, elegance. That is why I am the Master, and you, the student. Now, go upstairs and scrape him off the carpet.”
Sharing My World 2016 Week 52
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World. It seems a bit odd doing “2016 Week 52” in 2017. Maybe I should have done it yesterday.
What’s your favourite ice-cream flavor?
I’m a big fan of many many ice cream flavours! I think one of my favourites is a mascarpone one by Carte D’Or (Walls). I like the red berry sauce. I also like black cherry flavour.
If you were to treat yourself to the “finer things” what would you treat yourself to?
Maybe quality food – decent meats, cheese and so on. Yesterday I baked a load of cupcakes, some for me, some to take to give to my parents and brother later on today. They don’t look great (first time I’ve made icing!) but I’m sure they taste okay. Some of them have black cherry jam in (the ones with the strange dark lines)!
These ones are all for me! The ones I’m taking away are already boxed up.
Have you ever been drunk?
Yes.
Complete this sentence: My favourite supposedly guilty pleasure is…
Tech stuff. Even when I don’t really need it. A couple of weeks ago I put in a home alarm system and now I’m considering an Amazon Echo thing and some WeMo Wi-Fi plugs so I control my house with voice commands 🙂
Happy New Year to everyone!
FF – Adapt or Die
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, the weekly 100 word story prompt hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo comes from Shaktiki Sharma.
I was going to do a Christmassy one, maybe with Santa in it, but the first thing this photo said to me was “death in the shadows” 🙂
To read this week’s other stories, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright Shaktiki Sharma
A scream, swiftly silenced, rang through the darkness. The humans shuddered and gathered closer to the light. Since the Awakening, things waited in the shadows.
They said there are no monsters.
They were wrong.
Graduk smiled to itself, pouring more energy into its bio-luminescent appendages. Its glow increased, drawing more of the bipeds close. “Adapt or die” was a favourite saying amongst them, it had heard. Those of its brethren, lurking in the dark places waiting for an occasional foolish meal, had not adapted.
Graduk had.
It increased its glow still more and awaited the unsuspecting feast.
Sharing My World 2015 Week 51 Holiday Edition
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World series.
What is your favourite holiday?
Christmas, I guess. There are only two, really. Christmas and Easter. Unless you count Bank Holidays, and they’re just days off work.
What types of food is associated with your holiday?
The traditional turkey and trimmings. I always buy some nice cheese and meat. And there’s always lots of chocolate of course. If you get through Christmas without putting on at least 10lbs it’s not really Christmas, is it?
I found this year that I have made a “terrible miscalculation”. After wrapping everything, I find that I “accidentally” bought far too many boxes of chocolates and chocolate biscuits.
What a mistake to make. I guess I’ll just have to suck it up and eat them all myself. Bwahahaha nom nom nom.
Do you travel for your holiday?
I’m off to my parents’ later today and then to my brother’s. They all live in town about 2 miles apart, and about 10 miles from me.
Is it a religious or spiritual holiday?
Religious, I guess. The early Christian Church decided it needed a day to celebrate Jesus’ birthday. Since nobody knows quite when He was born, the Church chose the feast of Saturnalia in what is now called “December”, hoping, I guess, that the pagans would gradually come across to Christianity since they were having a bit of a knees up around that time anyway.
Is there a gift exchange?
Oh yes indeedy 🙂
How long does the celebration last?
For me, a day or so. For the shops, from just after Halloween (so early November) until around mid-January. At that point the shops switch to Easter-mode and start filling the shelves with Easter bunnies.
Merry Christmas everybody 🙂
FF – A Pie They Died For
Here is my happy jolly Christmas offering for Friday Fictioneers, the weekly 100 word photo prompt hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Roger Bultot.
To read this week’s other stories, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright Roger Bultot
“Hey, look, I love UV black light, let’s go in.”
“Yeah, it’s such a great colour!”
“And it shows up all sorts of stains and blood and Oh. My. God. What the Hell happened here? Waitress?”
“Good evening! Coffee? Pie?”
“What happened, Miss?”
“Ooh, a big grisly murder. A whole bus-load of tourists. And they never found the bodies!”
“Never found the bodies?”
“No. Not a single one!”
“Wow. Weird. I wonder what happened to them? Anyway, I guess we’ll have a couple of coffees. And a slice of pie with two forks, please. ‘Mystery meat pie’. Sounds tasty!”
Sharing My World 2016 Week 50
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World.
What is your favourite smell? What memory does it remind you of?
Bacon cooking. It reminds me of food!
What type of pet do you have or want to have?
I recently had a pet mouse. I called him Moby.
Well, I say “pet”. He was living under the fridge. I bought a couple of traps. Snap squish!
Only joking! Here is Moby. Sorry about the picture quality.
I drove Moby out to the local owl sanctuary and let him go.
Only joking!
It was the local cats’ home.
Only joking!
I let him go in the countryside.
Yesterday Moby II joined him. Here is Moby II.
I’d just got back from the work Christmas party at 23:30 (40 miles away) and I was not impressed that I had to drive out into the country again. But you mustn’t leave mousies in the trap too long or they get stressed. Hopefully the Mobys will find each other.
Are you usually late, early, or right on time?
I’m always early. I don’t like to be late.
For recharging, would you rather meditate, swim, walk, listen to music, write, read, yoga, qigong, other?
I plug myself in. I’m a robot! WE ARE LIVING AMONG YOU.
Just kidding.
Or am I? AM I?
FF – Poor Ned
Here is my story for the 100 word flash fiction challenge Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week she also provided the photo.
To read the other stories for this week, click the blue froggy.
“Ugh. What the MyLittlePony is this?”
“Winter feed. Not a fan?”
“Neigh.”
“Get used to it. The grass is all wet and stuff so we get this instead.”
“What’re these hard bits?”
“Nutritional Supplement Number 87. Tasty. Ned’ll tell you. Where is Ned, anyway?”
“Last I saw, vet was with him. He didn’t look well.”
“Hope he’s okay.”
“I’m sure he’ll be fine. So what’s this under this patch of hay? Looks like a… a… face…”
“Let me see… oh. Oh dear.”
“What? What?”
“It’s Ned. Guess he didn’t make it. Tuck in, he always liked to be useful!”
Sharing My World 2016 Week 49
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World.
What do you value most in a friendship?
Ooh, really huge expensive birthday presents. Wait, reading that back to myself, it sounds a bit mercenary. Someone who listens and doesn’t judge. There you go, that’s better.
Do you prefer eating the frosting of the cake or the cupcake first? Do you prefer a specific flavour?
I eat both at the same time. They’re designed to complement each other, and they do! Any flavour is good for me.
Have you ever been in a submarine? If you haven’t, would you want to?
I seem to remember going in one a long time ago. It was one of those decommissioned ones from years ago for people to walk around, so it didn’t have any atomic torpedoes or anything on it. It was also on the water rather than under it. I quite like enclosed spaces, but I’m not so sure I would like being under all that water as well.
If 100 people your age were chosen at random, how many do you think you’d find leading a more satisfying life than yours?
Oh, golly gosh, cor blimey and whatnot, what a question! Sounds like something you’d be asked in a psych evaluation. I’m going to play it safe and say 50.
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I totally didn't win!
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