FF – Ancients

March 24, 2022 44 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Rochelle herself!

The scientists gasped as the quantum time-space manipulator hummed to life. The broken ruins before them transformed – pristine buildings, people everywhere… people under attack! The Ancients, an advanced yet savage, cannibalistic race thought to have left Earth millennia ago, were killing, burning – feasting.

“It’s like we’re actually there!” enthused Professor Hayworth, team leader. “A doorway to the past! This will rewrite history!”

One of the Ancients turned towards him and threw a spear. It slammed through the professor’s chest, throwing him backwards.

The scientists had forgotten what any schoolchild knows – a door, once opened, works both ways.

The Ancients flooded through.

Sharing My World 14-03-2022

March 20, 2022 22 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

How do you tell if someone has a sense of humour?
When they tell a hilarious off-colour joke which causes my coffee to spray out of my nose.

What sort of music do you prefer?
It depends on my mood. Anything pop through to symphonic rock and (lighter) heavy metal. Nothing rap, garage, hip hop or classical.

Thoughts on gravy or ‘sauce”? Yea or nay?
Well, they’re staples. Sometimes I even eat some food with my sauce.

Would you enjoy a hot air balloon ride?
I reckon it would great. I would love to do it. The views, the quiet…

But please no-one offer to take me on one, as it looks terrifying and we would crash and I would surely die.

Categories: About draliman Tags:

FF – Building Fences

March 17, 2022 40 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Brenda Cox.

Copyright Brenda Cox

I used to play wiv da kids across da street. But den deir parents tried to take our stuff an’ break our houses. So our parents built a big fence. Now I can’t play wiv dem any more. An’ dey is nasty now too. Dey grabbed my teddy bear Mr Fluffles through da fence and dey kicked him aroun’. I can’t reach him. He looks lonely. Dey won’t give him back. Poor Mr Fluffles.

I hope our parents can make up soon.

It cold tonight. Mr Fluffles doesn’t have any heating. I hope Mr Fluffles is okay.

Sharing My World 07-03-2022

March 13, 2022 15 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

What’s The Strangest Thing In Your Refrigerator?
Strange? In my fridge? Perish the thought. My fridge doesn’t contain the heads of any of my enemies. Absolutely not. How dare you imply otherwise.

Would You Rather Hear The Music Of Johann Sebastian Bach Played By A Barbershop Quartet, Or A Heavy Metal Band?
Definitely Heavy Metal. Everything sounds better in Heavy Metal.

If You Could Erase One Event From History, Which One Would You Erase?
Erasing events from history is not a good idea. How many films have we seen regarding time travel? Changing stuff never works out well. The film industry has the right of it.

If Your Food Is Bad At A Restaurant, Do You Say Something?
If it’s obviously uncooked or cold I’ll say something. If it’s simply not very nice I just won’t go back. It’s tricky these days around here – some places keep changing hands – it’s good, it’s rubbish, it’s good again…

Categories: About draliman Tags:

FF – Missing

March 9, 2022 54 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Lisa Fox.

Copyright Lisa Fox

I wonder what’s in there? thought the little boy as he wandered past. The doors and windows were barred, stopping him getting in. Sometimes he thought he heard noises inside, a voice maybe. He had asked, but his Dad told him it was just his imagination.

There was nothing in there.

I wonder what’s out there? thought the little girl as she sat in the dark. The doors and windows were barred, stopping her getting out. Sometimes, she thought she heard noises outside, a voice maybe. She had asked, but the Man told her it was just her imagination.

There was nothing out there.

Sharing My World 28-02-2022

March 5, 2022 17 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World. It’s a day earlier than usual as I’m busy tomorrow and I can’t afford to run out of time as Monday will bring a new SYW!

Is any one person’s life worth more than another’s? Why or why not?
No. Or, if you like, you could measure someone’s life by the number of other lives it would affect. Like, if someone were to die, how many other’s lives would get better/worse? If, just as an example, off the top of my head, some random dictator, from Eastern Europe, say, fell in the bath tub tomorrow and broke his (or her) neck, would a whole lot of people’s lives suddenly get a lot better?

Can a good person do evil things and remain a good person? Under what circumstances?
I don’t reckon so. A good person can do bad things and remain a good person, but “evil” takes a certain sort of person.

Is somebody morally culpable if they take a morally wrong action at the orders of a superior? What if their life is at stake?
Ooh, the “I was just following orders” defence. According to the war crimes court, yes, they’re culpable.

People had widely mixed opinions about illegal bananas, so let’s take that a step further this week: What would be the worst thing for a government to make illegal?
The world wide web. I’d have to, like, talk to people. IRL. Urgh 😦

Categories: About draliman Tags:

FF – An Inadvisable Decapitation

March 2, 2022 40 comments

Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Anne Higa.

Copyright Anne Higa

“Daddy, why is it leaning?”

“Ah, son, that’s because when the aliens borrowed it for study they didn’t put it back straight.”

“Frank! Stop filling the kid’s head full of nonsense!”

Meanwhile, in orbit…

“Helmsman K’Charg, look at it! It’s on the piss! What does the Prime Directive say? Hmm? Hmm?”

“Umm, after borrowing an alien artefact for study, put it back the way you found it?”

“Exactly!”

“I think we’ll have trouble with that human specimen, then. I removed its head to look inside but when I glued it back on it wasn’t working anymore.”

“Oh, K’Charg, you idiot!”

“Hahaha!”

“Hahaha!”

The Ninth CoW – Critter!

February 27, 2022 35 comments

It’s that time of the year again! It’s Evil Squirrel’s Ninth Annual Contest of Whatever! Woohoo!

This year we’ve been given a picture of a critter. Who is he/she? What is he/she? That’s our job. It’s backstory time!

I have decided to write a little poem. Since I can’t write poetry, I am using a poetic structure I have made up called “random pentameter”. This means that it doesn’t have to scan or rhyme and things change from verse to verse. I can see it becoming quite popular.

Copyright Evil Squirrel’s Nest

The fact is clear, for all to see
From rhino to tiniest bumblebee
Our poor little friend is obviously
Butt ugly.

His favourite story, the ugly duck
Became a swan
He hoped this for himself
But no such luck.

Wandering the world alone
No luggage, anything, not e’en a phone
He chanced upon a place, it was the best
He’d found the Evil Squirrel’s Nest!

In Shelf Critter Theatre(R)(TM)(c) he became a God
Always watching out for the underdog
Exalted above all the rest
In every episode at the Nest.

He was so happy
So carefree
It really was a sight to see
On a natural high
He carelessly
Walked into the road with little fuss
And was run over by the Number 19 bus.

Wait, wait wait, some of you probably wanted a happy ending? Here you go.

There was no strife
Within his life
Our critter even found a wife!
Isn’t that nice.

Categories: Poems Tags:

Sharing My World 21-02-2022

February 27, 2022 21 comments

Here is my post for Melanie’s Share Your World.

What’s the most useful thing you know?
How to find the toilet.


What impact do you think it would have on the world if bananas were illegal?
Bananas? Illegal? What madness is this? What mad despot has passed this law?

I expect it would make quite a difference to the banana growers and pickers.


What social stigma does society need to just get over?
Wearing red and green at the same time. Okay, it’s not nice, it makes you look like a Christmas elf, but just get over it, people.


Do you prefer the moral viewpoint of consequentialism, which focuses on the consequences of actions, or deontology, which focuses on the innate rightness or wrongness of the actions themselves?
This sounds like “do people avoid wrongdoing because they’re afraid of getting into trouble, or because it’s actually wrong”. The latter is preferable, we have laws and police for the former.

Categories: About draliman Tags:

FF – A World Askew

February 26, 2022 36 comments

Here is my post for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Roger Bultot.

I had nothing this week and finally, several days later than usual, ended up with this.

Copyright Roger Bultot

Did you notice? That the world is getting a little askew?

Don’t worry if you didn’t. It happens very slowly. Very slowly indeed. Just a tiny bit at a time. So it’s hard to spot.

Little by little everything goes sideways. Things aren’t quite right any more. If we don’t do something, pretty soon up will be down and left will be right and no-one will even have noticed.

But have you noticed?

Close your eyes and look at the world with your mind.

Does it look quite right to you?