FF – SpyBird
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Jean L. Hays.
I’m not all that taken with my story this week, it just seems to amble along, but never mind 🙂
Copyright Jean L. Hays
Inside the truck, Agent Smith describes his new invention to his superiors…
“There’s SpyBird approaching the house, its cunningly situated head-mounted micro-camera transmitting everything it sees to our monitor. See how it sneaks covertly past the window.”
Inside the drug dealers’ house…
“Hey, there’s a bird flapping around outside the window with a great big camera strapped to its head. Kill it!”
And so Agent Smith’s SpyBird was consigned to the bin of espionage history alongside his equally ill-fated MurderPen, ExplosionSoap and ElectrocutionDoorbell. He later died of massive blood loss following an unfortunate incident during development of his ScissorBladeToiletSeat.
Pegman – The Forever Bunker
Here is a story I wrote for What Pegman Saw, which takes us to Palo Duro State Park in Texas.
I seem to drop in and out of Pegman when the muse takes me and when I have time. Hope that’s okay.
Copyright Erik Rathgaber for Google Maps
Jeff checked the environmental seals, as he did every day. The same routine, every day of his life.
Ding dong!
The doorbell! This had never happened before! He ran to the hatch, donned his environmental suit and triggered the release. Outside stood a man… in normal clothes!
“How… how…?”
“Is this bunker 27? What are you all still doing down there? The Earth has been habitable for over 100 years!”
“But… I’ve looked out, every day. There’s nothing… devastation for miles, only scrub…”
“It’s the desert. It’s supposed to look like that.”
“The desert? Why was I not informed?”
“It’s all in the literature.”
“Well, maybe, but who has the time to read all that?”
“Time? Time? You’ve had nothing but time.”
“Hmm. 100 years, you say? I don’t suppose the others’ll be all that happy. Best not tell them. Good day to you.”
Slam.
100 years later…
Ding dong!
Sharing Your World 2018 Week 23
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World.
A piece of clothing from your younger childhood you still remember?
I remember one or two bits and bobs. I remember wearing such excitements as shorts and sandals to primary school. Corduroy trousers. I had a “cool” cagoule, a really thin one, which folded up into a tiny pouch and was worn around the waist. I always wore a snake belt, much like this one.
Regardless of your physical fitness, coordination or agility: if you could be an athlete what would do do? Remember this is SYW, dreaming is always allowed.
I reckon I’d be a long distance runner. It would be nice to be able to go out for long runs by myself (even in a race I’d be by myself as I’d be miles ahead of everyone else), just loping along mile after mile without having to stop every couple of hundred metres to gasp for air and throw up in the ditch.
In a car would you rather drive or be a passenger?
Generally I’d prefer to drive. I’m hardly ever a passenger – maybe once a year if my parents are driving me out somewhere. My Mum always complains that I go “too fast” when I’m driving, though. I don’t think she like the g-forces 😦
FF – DocuDrone 4000
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Roger Bultot.
Copyright Roger Bultot
“Good, yes, good shot, zoom…”
“This drone is great. This’ll be one hell of a documentary.”
“Yep! Lower… careful, CAREFUL! Okay, that was his carotid artery. What a mess.”
“It’s really hard to control.”
“Watch out… urgh. I hope she wasn’t right-handed.”
“Why are the rotor blades so sharp?”
“Dunno. We got it cheap from military surplus.”
“Zooming in for a headshot. Wonder what this button does?”
Rat-a-tat-a-tat splatter.
“Oh, hell. Headshot is right.”
“What’s the name of this documentary, anyway?”
“Originally, Faces of Art. Now… Murder at the Museum? Bohemian Bloodbath? Thirty to Life, No Parole? Take your pick.”
Sharing My World 2018 Week 22
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World.
If you were to pack a basket for a picnic lunch, what would be in your basket?
Just the simple things, I’m a man of simple tastes.
Quail eggs, caviar on crackers, smoked salmon with lemon on freshly-cooked bread. I’ll leave it to the servants to sort out the crockery and silverware. I’m sure they won’t mind carrying the folding table across hill and dale. That sort of thing.
Nothing too fancy.
On a vacation what you would require in any place that you sleep?
Just the simple things, I’m a man of simple tastes.
Four-poster bed with curtains. Whirlpool bathing tub. Gift baskets containing hand-crafted chocolate, delivered daily. Twenty four hour silver service. Exclusive access to the penthouse lift. That sort of thing.
Nothing too fancy.
If you were to buy a new house/apartment what are the top three items on your wish list?
Just the simple things, I’m a man of simple tastes.
Hilltop setting with infinity pool. Separate luxury accommodations for the servants – got to keep them happy! Massive garage filled with classic cars, monitored 24/7 from the on-site security office. That sort of thing.
Nothing too fancy.
FF – Not to be Trifled With
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Connie Gayer. After insulting Rochelle’s heirloom last week, I thought I’d leave Russell alone 🙂
Copyright Connie Gayer
“What’ya doin’, Bill?”
“Planting taters!”
“What fer?”
“Uncle Frank say he givin’ me a hun’red dollars fer doin’ it!”
“Wow! A hun’red dollars! You’ll be rich. Where’d he git so much?”
“Stole it off’a Aunt Vera, he tol’ me.”
“Whoa. Scary lady. Not ter be trifled wiv. Don’t you be gittin’ mixed up in it, Bill.”
“C’mon, what she gonna do? I kin buy a new bike, new shoes, everyfink!”
“Yeah, true. An’ it’ll be Uncle Frank she mad at, not you.”
“Hey, wos dis? Somefink’s in da hole!”
“Dig down!”
“Diggin’! Ooh…”
“Wos down dere?”
“Uncle Frank.”
“Well, shit.”
Sharing My World 2018 Week 21
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World.
What household chore do you absolutely enjoy doing? (can be indoor or outdoor)
Chore? Enjoy? Do? Does not compute. Does not compute.
I don’t enjoy doing any chores, let alone “absolutely enjoy”.
The second dictionary definition of “chore” is “a tedious but necessary task”. I usually find a way to make chores less “necessary”.
Create a sentence with the words “neon green” and train”.
I like to keep fit, and always train in neon green spandex.
There’s an image your imagination can never unsee bwahahaha.
Other than your mobile phone what can you always be found with?
My wallet. With a phone and money you can usually get out of any unforeseen emergency situation.
FF – Out of Ideas
Here is my “not really a story” for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Rochelle.
I was a bit stumped this week and didn’t have a lot of time.
Copyright Rochelle Wisoff-Fields
“Okay then, here goes…
“The mists rolled ominously across the moors. Bethwick drew a deep breath, cocked his rifle and strode out into the gloom. Suddenly…”
“Hang on, what’s this?”
“My photo prompt story.”
“You’re supposed to be writing about a weed in an ash tray.”
“Shh, keep it down. That’s probably her prize crystal serving dish.”
“It’s definitely a weed, though.”
“Yeah, I’ll give you that. Okay, ditch the tale of intrigue and murder out on the misty moors. Take two!”
“There once was a weed which lived in an ash… I’m not feeling it. Pub?”
“Yeah.”
Sharing My World 2018 Week 20
Here’s my post for Cee’s Share Your World.
Complete this sentence: This sandwich could really use some…
… hot sauce.
What is your least favourite candy?
Liquorice. ‘Tis indeed the devil’s food.
What sign are you? Do you believe in astrology?
Libra. And no. I once had a read of the traits of a Libran, and I was amazed! A lot of it was me! Then I read the traits of the other signs. And I was amazed! A lot of it was me too!
This stuff, and horoscopes, are like a self-fulfilling prophecy. Once you’ve read it you find a way to make it true, or see it in yourself.
FF – Wrath of the Gods
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was submitted by Courtney Wright from an anonymous source.
Heh. I started smiling the instant I saw this and within 5 minutes my story was all typed in. So you can probably guess it’s not one of those “cerebral” ones. You know, like the ones I never write.
Copyright anonymous, submitted by Courtney Wright
“Wow. Sure they’re Chaeron’s boots?”
“Verily. They were still smoking when I arrived.”
“You think Zeus finally zapped him for his blasphemy?”
“Maybe. Wait though, who’s this? Hey, it’s Chaeron!”
“It worked! My teleporter! It worked! It zapped me clear over the other side of the village! Left my boots behind. Needs a little adjustment.”
“Yeah, Chaeron. Sure it did. C’mon, Callinus, let’s go.”
“No, wait, it did work! I am all powerful! More powerful than even feeble Zeus! The gods will tremble…”
Zap! Bang! Fizz!
“What was that flash of light?”
“Dunno. Can you smell barbecue? I smell barbecue.”
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I totally didn't win!
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