FF – No Pain No Gain
Here is my story for this week’s Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by Magaly Guerrero.
Click on the blue froggy for this week’s other stories.
Copyright Magaly Guerrero
“So what’s all this gubbins for, again?”
“The heels are for my night out.”
“Yeah, I got that.”
“The art book reminds me of the suffering endured through the ages for the sake of beauty. Like me in my heels.”
“Okay…”
“The red book is a medical reference so I know everything that’s gone wrong with my feet after my night out in my heels.”
“And the little suitcase?”
“Antiseptic, plasters and whatnot. To fix my feet up ready for my next night out. In my heels.”
“I’d switch to flats if I were you.”
“Dad, don’t you know anything? Men!”
Sharing My World 2017 Week 15
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World.
Have you ever participated in a distance walking, swimming, running, or biking event? Tell your story.
I have done quite a few marathons.
Netflix marathons.
Ha ha ha.
No.
Name one thing not many people know about you.
No, because then lots of people would know it about me 🙂
What is your favourite flower?
I don’t really have a favourite flower. I have favourite flower colours, my preference being blues and purples. Here are some which pop up in my back garden every Spring.
I don’t know anything about flowers but I’m guessing they’re bluebells since they’re blue and they looks like bells.
Things I want to have in my home (paintings, hot tubs, book cases, big screen TV etc)
I’ve pretty much got everything in my house that I want/need. The TV in the sitting room is already as big as will fit, though it’s not big by today’s standards (42″).
Catching up on last night’s “Casualty”
I have pictures on the walls and as many book cases as I have wall space for.
My house is full!
FF – Senseless Waste
Here is my contribution to Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo is from Dale Rogerson. Thanks, Dale! I have a very clear image in my mind of my two protagonists 🙂
(In case it’s not used where you are, a “copper” is a police office. I guess, thinking about it, that’s where the American word “cop” comes from.)
To read the other stories, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright Dale Rogerson
“I can’t believe it, Jenkins.”
“Nor me, Sarge.”
“All my years as a copper, to see this.”
“Frightful, Sarge.”
“In his own home, his own home!”
“His castle, Sarge.”
“Safely locked away from the stinking, all-encompassing evil out there.”
“Evil, Sarge. All-encompassing.”
“What a waste, Jenkins, a stupid, senseless, waste!”
“Senseless, Sarge.”
“His safe haven, away from prying eyes, and he still couldn’t bring himself to eat the whole pizza.”
“Pathetic, Sarge.”
“I’ll be ripping the piss out of him when he gets back from the shops. And Jenkins? No need to call me ‘Sarge’ when we’re off duty.”
“Understood, Sarge.”
Sharing My Toast Week 14
Cee’s Share Your World is on pause this week as she was ill on question-setting day (I hope you’re feeling better, Cee!). There have been a couple of sets of questions drifting around but I thought that after last week’s small fire you might like to know how I’m getting on with my cheese toastie experiments.
When it comes to things like this, I’ve always been a “to the max” kinda person. Shelf right up the top, grill set to maximum power. That probably contributed to my toasties bursting into flames. So this week, I moved the shelf down to the bottom!
As you can see, a partial success. No flames this time, but still plenty of burnt bits to cut off. The sauce on the top is this one.
The downside is that because the sauce is on the top it touches my lips, which burns quite a lot. This isn’t the sort of sauce you want to get on your lips, your chin, open cuts, anywhere sensitive…
For next week I have a new plan! My grill has two settings – full and half.
I was under the impression that “half” only heated half the grill, like the left or something. In case you only wanted to grill one piece of toast.
Now that I think about it, it sounds a bit mad.
So next week I will try a lower shelf plus half-power. Wish me luck!
FF – The Aspiring Poet
Here is my contribution to Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was sent in by Jellico’s Stationhouse.
To read this week’s other entries, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright Jellico’s Stationhouse
A bicycle, yet not; a shadow, a merest thought of what was once a bicycle; an imagining, if you will, a suspicion of shape, of purpose, not yet formed in the mind of… whom? May we even dare to imagine this being, this shadow, this merest hint…
“Oh, good God, will you ever shut UP!”
“I’m channelling my inner poet.”
“Well, I’ve had enough. I’m off down town. I’m taking my bike.”
“No, wait, my muse, ridden away… hmm…”
Never more to cast the merest hint of shadow, a void where once the thought of a maybe-bicycle enters one’s imaginings…
Sharing My World 2017 Week 13
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World series.
Does your first or middle name have any significance (or were you named after another family member)?
No to both questions (and names), as far as I’m aware. My first name is a mixture of English (Dad) and Scottish (Mum) spellings, though it’s quite a common spelling. I’m used to people spelling it wrong, though.
Just last week I emailed someone and signed off “Alistair”. He replied “Hi, Allister”…
Music or silence while working?
Music, usually. I often listen to music at work on my headphones. Most people in IT at my company do throughout the day. Not if I’m doing something really complicated, though.
If you had a special place for your three most special possessions (not including photos, electronics, people or animals), what would they be?
Not electronics? What does that leave? 🙂
I put artwork by my friends’ kids on my fridge.
The Never List: What are things you know you never will do?
In true Bond style, I will “Never say Never Again”! Except I’m never going to bungee jump. Or do any extremely dangerous things. There are enough ways to suddenly die already without flinging myself out of an aeroplane.
And on that happy note, I shall leave you to your Sunday!
Though I will just add, did anyone know that cheese toasties can be quite dangerous? I left mine under the grill for less than a minute on Thursday and when I went to check they had burst into flames! I was going to fetch my phone to take a photo, but I decided discretion was the better part of valour and put the fire out instead.
They tasted nice though after I’d snapped off the charcoal. They had quite an authentic flame-grilled taste.
FF – Pilot Boats
Here is my story (sort of) for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This weeks’s nautical photo was contributed by Fatima Fakier Deria.
It’s a lot harder than you think to deliberately write something awful. My stories are getting ever madder bwahahaha.
To read the other stories for this week, click on the blue froggy.
Copyright Fatima Fakier Deria
The gloriously-restored ship sets sail, its canvas billowing majestically as the stalwart (yet horribly uninformed) helmsman steers erroneously to port. The graceful ship plows catastrophically into the harbour wall, its timbers splintering in majestic fashion. The gloriously-attired crew members fall into the fatally-cold (yet majestic) sea as the majestically glorious ship sinks gracefully to the bottom on its gloriously majestic (yet final) voyage.
This has been an advert for Porthmiggin Harbour Authority – always use a qualified Pilot – We’re expensive but so’s your boatTM
[Also, new PR intern required. Plain, simple language skills a must. Own thesaurus preferred. Apply within.]
Sharing My World 2017 Week 12
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World series.
How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?
Hmm, tricky one. I’d better use a clever computer algorithm to work this out. Let’s see now… link in the Moto Body app, heart rate, blood pressure, random number generator (careful with the boundaries), carry the one, take away the number you first thought of…
702.
That can’t be right, can it? Well computers don’t lie. 702.
So, you’re on your way out and it’s raining. Do you know where your umbrella is or do you frantically search for it all over your apartment/house?
I know exactly where it is. Nowhere. Brollies are either so weak they blow inside out the moment someone sneezes or so strong you get blown in front of a bus. You’ve just got to hope one of those happens before you poke someone’s eye out.
Thinking about it, brollies are few and far between these days in town. There just isn’t room in the crowds.
Do you recharge your energy by going out with friends for a good time or by spending with quiet time alone?
Alone. I’m not sure how one can recharge one’s batteries by going out. It can be very tiring!
Name three things you and your spouse, partner or best friend to have in common.
Like the same films, same sense of humour and, um, something else makes three things.
FF – Onche a Shpy
Here is my story for Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle. This week’s photo was contributed by J. Hardy Carroll.
I had an idea but couldn’t make an actual story out of it and then a certain somebody sprang to mind and it all came together 🙂 . Last time, I promise 😉 . Click on the blue froggy for this week’s other stories.
Copyright J Hardy Carroll
The ageing figure clambered arthritically over the fence, grimacing as the spikes gashed his arm. Undeterred, he crashed through tree branches, grazing his face. Extracting an immaculately-pressed handkerchief, he wiped off the blood and pressed on, tripping over a tree stump and dislocating his shoulder.
Ignoring the pain he finally stumbled to the door, above which he spied the banner – “Welcome Intelligence Operatives Class of 1962!” He looked over others in the queue – all appeared perfectly groomed.
“For heaven’s sake, Bond!” snapped M. “It’s a party! Can’t you use the front gate like everyone else?”
“Onche a shpy, alwaysh a shpy.”
Sharing My World 2017 Week 11
Here is my post for Cee’s Share Your World.
Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?
I don’t use lifts as a rule. In Cornwall we don’t have any buildings high enough that I can’t take the stairs. I don’t like to be squished into a little metal box with lots of other people.
However, if I do need to take the lift I push the button once. Pushing the button more than once will have one of the following effects:
- No effect (most likely)
- Slow it down slightly as it processes the extra button push(es). This can also happen if you keep pushing a link on a website if nothing seems to be happening – all you’re doing is asking the server to process more and more.
- Break it
Do you plan out things usually or do you do them more spontaneous (for example if you are visiting a big city you don’t know?)
If I was driving there I’d check out the route and parking. If I was staying there I’d book in advance. Apart from that I’d check out what there is to see there and then just play it by ear. The worst thing I could do is make an itinerary as I’d panic if it didn’t go absolutely to plan.
Describe yourself in at least four uplifting words.
I can’t think of anything. I don’t really do “uplifting” 😦
If you had a choice which would be your preference salt water beaches, fresh water lakes, ocean cruise, hot tub, ski resort or desert?
Beaches are okay.
But I prefer lakes.
Horsies
I would like to visit a desert once day but there isn’t one for thousands of miles.
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